Question about "marking" in the congregation

by Olin Moyles Ghost 22 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Olin Moyles Ghost
    Olin Moyles Ghost

    Can one of the resident scholars settle a disagreement about the current JW practice of "marking"?

    My understanding is that marking works this way: Suppose Annie is a JW who persists in an activity that is strongly frowned upon by the Society--but is not a DF-ing offense (for example, she is dating a non-witness), then Annie gets counseled by the elders. If Annie continues to date the unbeliever, then the elders may decide to "mark" her.

    This is done via a "marking talk." Basically, it's a local needs part on the Service Meeting. An elder explicitly states during the talk that it is a marking talk. The elder describes the type of activity that is going on, but does not name the individual who is being marked. Anyone in the congregation who knows that Annie is dating an unbeliever is expected to limit their association with her. But Annie can still go out in service and do other "theocratic" activities with the congregation.

    A friend told me that the JWs don't do marking like this anymore. Am I right, or is he?

  • willyloman
    willyloman

    I can't cite chapter and verse (any more) but in my couple of decades as an elder and nearly 30 years a WT slave I concluded that nobody really understood the whole marking concept. The references in WT lit seem clear enough, but in actual practice marking was a rare event. I only heard a few "marking talks" in my dub life, at least ones that I knew were such. It was often unclear. The rank and file typically had no idea when such a talk was the genuine article, and on the other hand they often assumed that any counsel from the platform was a form of marking if they could clearly identify the target.

    Another one of those dub things that, in retrospect, often makes me wonder WTF I was thinking.

  • Dagney
    Dagney

    You are right OMG.

    That is how it is supposed to work.

    However, I was told that I was marked by an "elder" patriach of a family I used to be close to. My MS nephew and the family was told to discontinue association with me because I was "disobedient to the slave."

    So they can make their own rules about this stuff when they want to.

  • musky
    musky

    There should be a big black "X" marker ed on the forehead of those marked. No beating around the bush about who it is. Until they straighten up and fly right, That "X" stays.

  • Bonnie_Clyde
    Bonnie_Clyde

    Clyde is good friends with a long-standing JW. He was a PO for many years and now a widower in his 80's. I won't go into great detail, but will just say that Clyde has truly been his best friend in every way.

    About a year ago, two elders half his age took him aside at the hall and counselled him to stop associating with Clyde as he was "bad association." I guess you would call that marking.

  • villabolo
    villabolo

    I recall, about thirty years ago, that there was a punishment called "Public Reproof". I recall the announcement made against a married couple who were mentioned by name like when they disfellowship you.

    That couple was actually at the meeting when the announcement was made. I'll never forget the look of fear mixed with shame as they huddled together in their seats.

    I guess they've gone through some changes in terminology and actions.

    villabolo

  • Atlantis
    Atlantis

    (Credit goes to Ezekiel3) This is the complete text from Chapter 14 of Organized to Do Jehovah's Will. Prepare to hear more about "sifting" from the Org... http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/beliefs/87606/1/Chapter-14-Dread-Unabridged-Details-from-the-new-OD-Book


    CHAPTER 14

    MAINTAINING THE PEACE AND CLEANNESS OF THE CONGREGATION

    EACH year thousands of people flock to Jehovah's house of pure worship, in fulfillment of Bible prophecy. (Mic. 4:1, 2) How happy we are to receive them into "the congregation of God"! (Acts 20:28) They appreciate the opportunity to serve Jehovah with us and to enjoy our spiritual paradise. This spiritually clean and peaceful environment is made possible by the operation of Jehovah's holy spirit and by our applying the wise counsel found in his Word, the Bible.?Ps. 119:105; Zech. 4:6.

    Application of Bible principles enables us to put on the Christian personality. (Col. 3:10) We make every effort to conform our way of life to Jehovah's righteous standards. For this reason, we put aside petty disputes and personal differences. By accepting Jehovah's view of matters, we overcome divisive worldly influences, and this allows us to work unitedly in love as an international brotherhood.?Acts 10: 34, 35.

    Nevertheless, from time to time difficulties arise, affecting the peace and unity of the congregation. What is the cause? In most cases, it is a failure to heed and apply Bible counsel. We still have to cope with our imperfect human tendencies. Not one of us is without sin. (1 John 1:10) Someone may, without fully realizing it, take a false step that could introduce moral or spiritual uncleanness into the congregation. By our thoughtless action or unguarded tongue, we may offend someone, or we may feel offended because of what someone has said or done. (Rom. 3:23) When such difficulties arise, what can we do to set matters straight?

    We can be thankful that Jehovah has lovingly taken all of this into consideration. His Word provides counsel on what to do when difficulties arise on account of inherited imperfections and limitations or when wrongdoing is introduced into the congregation. Personal assistance is available from loving spiritual shepherds. By applying their Scriptural counsel, we can enjoy a fine relationship with all in the congregation and maintain a good standing with Jehovah. If we require discipline or reproof because of some wrongdoing on our part, we can be sure that such correction is an expression of our heavenly Father's love for us.?Prov. 3:11,12; Heb. 12:6.

    SETTLING MINOR DIFFERENCES

    There may be times when personal disputes or difficulties of a minor nature arise between individual members of the congregation. These should quickly be settled in a spirit of brotherly love. (Eph. 4:26; Phil. 2:2-4; Col. 3:12-14) Very likely you will find that most problems of a personal nature involving your relationship with another member of the congregation can be resolved by applying the apostle Peter's counsel to "have intense love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins." (1 Pet. 4:8) Such minor difficulties stem from human imperfection. We all stumble many times. (Jas. 3:2) By recognizing this and applying the Golden Rule, doing to others just as we would want them to do to us, wecan usually dispose of minor offenses by forgiving and forgetting.?Matt. 7:12.

    But if something has disturbed your relationship with someone in the congregation so much that you feel that another approach is needed, wisdom dictates that you do not delay in resolving the matter, knowing that your relationship with Jehovah is also involved. Jesus counseled his disciples: "If, then, you are bringing your gift to the altar and you there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar, and go away; first make your peace with your brother, and then, when you have come back, offer up your gift." (Matt. 5:23, 24) There may have been a misunderstanding. If so, it should be cleared up by giving priority to Christian unity and keeping the lines of communication open. Good communication among all in the congregation goes a long way toward preventing misunderstandings and resolving problems that arise because of human imperfection.

    PROVIDING NEEDED SCRIPTURAL COUNSEL

    At times, overseers may find it necessary to counsel someone, trying to readjust his thinking. This is not always easy. To the Christians in Galatia, the apostle Paul wrote: "Brothers, even though a man takes some false step before he is aware of it, you who have spiritual qualifications try to readjust such a man in a spirit of mildness."?Gal. 6:1.

    By lovingly caring for the flock, overseers protect the congregation from many spiritual dangers and prevent serious problems from developing. Shepherds of the flock should strive to make their service to the congregation measure up to Jehovah's promise through Isaiah: "Each one must prove to be like a hiding place from the wind and a place of concealment from the rainstorm, like streams of water in a waterless country, like the shadow of a heavy crag in an exhausted land."?Isa. 32:2.

    RESOLVING CERTAIN SERIOUS WRONGS

    Willingness to overlook offenses and to forgive does not mean that we are unconcerned about wrongdoing or that we approve of it. Not all wrongs can be charged to inherited imperfection; nor is it for our brother's good or for the good of the congregation to overlook wrongs that go beyond minor offenses. (Lev. 19:17; Ps. 141:5) The Law covenant recognized degrees of seriousness of sins and transgressions. This is also true in the Christian arrangement.?1 John 5:16,17.

    Jesus outlined some specific procedures for resolving problems involving serious wrongdoing that may arise between fellow Christians. Note the steps that he set out: "If your brother commits a sin, [1] go lay bare his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, [2] take along with you one or two more, in order that at the mouth of two or three witnesses every matter may be established. If he does not listen to them, [3] speak to the congregation. If he does not listen even to the congregation, let him be to you just as a man of the nations and as a tax collector."?Matt. 18:15-17.

    The illustration that Jesus subsequently gave, recorded at Matthew 18:23-35, shows that the sins considered at Matthew 18:15-17 are evidently such sins as those involving financial or property matters ?failure to make proper payment for something or some action involving a measure of fraud?or the damaging of someone's reputation by actual slander.

    If you have solid evidence that someone in the congregation has committed such a serious sin against you personally, do not be hasty to turn to the overseers or others, asking them to intervene on your behalf. As Jesus counseled, speak first with the one against whom you have a 'complaint. Try to resolve the matter between just the two of you without involving anyone else. If he does not respond favorably to your efforts, you may let a little time pass before taking the matter further. Keep in mind that Jesus did not say 'go only once, and lay bare his fault.' Therefore, if the person does not initially admit the wrong and ask forgiveness, it may be good to consider approaching him again later. If the matter can be straightened out in this way, the one who sinned will certainly appreciate that you have not told others about his sin or marred his good reputation in the congregation. You will have achieved your objective of 'gaining your brother.'

    If the one who committed the offense accepts responsibility, seeks forgiveness, and straightens the matter out, there is no need to carry the matter further. This shows that although serious, the offenses here discussed are limited to those that can be settled between the individuals involved. This does not include such offenses as fornication, adultery, homosexuality, blasphemy, apostasy, idolatry, and similar gross sins. (1 Cor. 6:9,10; Gal. 5:19-21) These sins require more than forgiveness from an offended individual. Since the spiritual and moral cleanness of the congregation may be threatened, such matters should be reported to the elders and handled by them.?1 Cor. 5:6; Jas. 5:14,15.

    If you are not able to gain your brother by 'laying bare his fault between you and him alone,' then you may do as Jesus said?take along one or two others and speak with your brother again. Those you take with you should also have the objective of gaining your brother. Preferably, they would be witnesses of the alleged wrongdoing, but if there are no eyewitnesses, you may choose to take along brothers to be witnesses to the discussion. They may have experience in the matter at issue and may be able to establish whether what occurred was truly a wrong. Elders chosen as witnesses do not represent the congregation, since the body of elders has not specifically assigned them in the matter.

    If you are convinced that your brother has committed a serious sin against you and you have evidence to prove it and the matter has not been resolved after repeated efforts?when you spoke with him alone and when you went to him with one or two others?and you feel that you cannot let it pass, then you should report the matter to the overseers of the congregation. Remember that their goal too is to maintain the peace and cleanness of the congregation. Having approached the elders, you will have taken the matter as far as you can. Leave the problem in their hands, and trust in Jehovah that it will be resolved. Never should you allow the conduct of someone else to stumble you or to rob you of your joy in Jehovah's service.?Ps. 119:165.

    If upon investigation it becomes evident to the shepherds of the flock that the brother has indeed committed a serious sin against you and yet has been unwilling to repent and try to make reasonable and appropriate amends, it may become necessary for the overseers to expel the unrepentant wrongdoer. In that way they protect the flock and safeguard the cleanness of the congregation.?Matt. 18:17.

    MARKING DISORDERLY ONES

    In his second letter to the Thessalonians, Paul warned of certain ones who were walking disorderly and who if accorded good standing in the congregation could exert an unhealthy influence. Paul admonished the Thessalonian Christians "to withdraw from every brother walking disorderly and not according to the tradition you received from us." He further clarified that statement by writing: "If anyone is not obedient to our word through this letter, keep this one marked, stop associating with him, that he may become ashamed. And yet do not be considering him as an enemy, but continue admonishing him as a brother."?2 Thess. 3:6,14,15.

    Occasionally, someone not known to be guilty of practicing a grave sin for which he could be expelled nevertheless displays flagrant disregard for theocratic order. This could include such things as being grossly lazy or critical, being a profitless talker who is a constant 'meddler with what does not concern him.' (2 Thess. 3:11) Or this could include one who is scheming to take material advantage of others or indulging in entertainment that is clearly improper. The disorderly conduct is not so minor that it can be handled by applying Bible counsel and manifesting love; rather, it is serious enough to reflect badly on the congregation and potentially to spread to other Christians.

    After giving repeated admonition to such an individual and finding that he persists in disregarding well-established Bible principles, the elders may decide that a talk should be given to the congregation providing appropriate counsel concerning such disorderly conduct. Elders will use reasonableness and discernment in determining whether a particular situation is sufficiently serious and disturbing to require a warning talk. This talk will not name the disorderly one. However, those who are aware of the situation described in the talk will take heed and limit their social contacts with such individuals.

    The loving concern and firm stand of faithful members of the congregation could indeed move the disorderly one to shame and repentance. When it is clearly evident that the individual has abandoned his disorderly course, it would no longer be necessary to treat him as a marked individual.

    HANDLING CASES OF SERIOUS WRONGDOING

    After taking the steps outlined at Matthew 18:15, 16, some individual brothers or sisters may report to the elders cases of unresolved serious wrongdoing. (Matt. 18:17) On the other hand, individuals may also approach the elders either to confess their own sin or to report what they know regarding the wrongdoing of others. (Lev. 5:1; Jas. 5:16) Regardless of the manner in which the elders first hear reports of serious wrongdoing on the part of a baptized member of the congregation, an initial investigation will be made by two elders. If it is established that there is substance to the report and that evidence is available showing that a serious sin actually has been committed, the body of elders will assign a judicial committee of at least three elders to handle the matter. Regarding serious wrongdoing by one who is unbaptized, see pages 157-8.

    While exercising watchful care of the flock, seeking to protect it from any elements that would be spiritually damaging, the elders will also endeavor to use God's Word skillfully to reprove any who have erred and will try to restore them. (Jude 21-23) This is in harmony with instructions given to Timothy by the apostle Paul, who wrote: "I solemnly charge you before God and Christ Jesus, who is destined to judge the living and the dead, . . . reprove, reprimand, exhort, with all long-suffering and art of teaching." (2 Tim. 4:1, 2) Doing so may take much time and effort, but this is part of the hard work of the elders. The congregation appreciates their endeavors and gives them double honor.?1 Tim. 5:17.

    In every situation where guilt is established, the primary endeavor of the overseers is to restore the wrongdoer if he is genuinely repentant as indicated, for example, by his producing "works that befit repentance." (Acts 26:20) If he is repentant and they are able to help him, their administering reproof either in private or before onlookers with knowledge of the case serves to discipline him and instill a wholesome fear in any such onlookers. (2 Sam. 12: 13; 1 Tim. 5:20) In all cases of judicial reproof, restrictions are imposed. Thus the wrongdoer may be helped to 'make straight paths for his feet' thereafter. (Heb. 12:13) In due course these restrictions are removed as the individual's spiritual recovery becomes manifest.

    ANNOUNCEMENT OF REPROOF

    If a judicial committee determines that an individual is repentant but that the matter is likely to become known in the congregation or in the community or if for other reasons the elders believe that the congregation needs to be advised, a simple announcement will be made during the Service Meeting. It should read: "[Name of person] has been reproved." The presiding overseer should approve this announcement.

    IF THE DECISION IS TO DISFELLOWSHIP

    In some cases the wrongdoer may become hardened in his course of sinful conduct and thus fail to respond to efforts to help him. Fruitage, or works, befitting repentance may not be in evidence, nor may genuine repentance be apparent at the time of the judicial hearing. What then? In such cases, it is necessary to expel the unrepentant wrongdoer from the congregation, thus denying him fellowship with Jehovah's clean congregation. This is done to remove the bad influence of the wrongdoer from the congregation, thereby safeguarding the moral and spiritual cleanness of the congregation and protecting its good name. (Deut. 21:20, 21; 22:23, 24) When the apostle Paul became aware of the shameful conduct of a member of the congregation in Corinth, he admonished the elders to "hand such a man over to Satan ... in order that the spirit [of the congregation] may be saved." (1 Cor. 5:5, 11-13) Paul also reported the disfellowshipping of others who had rebelled against the truth in the first century.?1 Tim. 1:20.

    When a judicial committee concludes that an unrepentant wrongdoer should be disfellowshipped, it should let him know of the decision, clearly stating the Scriptural reason(s) for the disfellowshipping. When informing the wrongdoer of their decision, the judicial committee should tell him that if he believes that a serious error in judgment has been made and he wishes to appeal the decision, he may do so by writing a letter clearly stating the reasons for his appeal. He will be allowed seven days for this, from the time he was notified of the committee's decision. If such written appeal is received, the body of elders should contact the circuit overseer, who will designate elders to serve on an appeal committee to rehear the case. The elders selected to care for this weighty responsibility should be men who are experienced and qualified. Every effort should be made to conduct the appeal hearing within one week after the written appeal is received. If there is an appeal, announcement of the disf ellowshipping will be held in abeyance. In the meantime, the accused person will be restricted from commenting and praying at meetings or from special privileges of service.

    An appeal is granted as a kindness to the accused and allows him a further hearing of his concerns. Thus, if he deliberately fails to appear at the appeal hearing, the disf ellowshipping should be announced after reasonable efforts have been made to contact him.

    If the wrongdoer does not wish to appeal, the judicial committee should explain to him the need for repentance and what steps he can take toward being reinstated in due time. This would be both helpful and kind and should be done in the hope that he will change his ways and in time qualify to return to Jehovah's organization.?2 Cor. 2:6, 7.

    ANNOUNCEMENT OF DISFELLOWSHIPPING

    When it is necessary to disfellowship an unrepentant wrongdoer from the congregation, a brief announcement is made, simply stating: "[Name of person] is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses." There is no need to elaborate. This will alert faithful members of the congregation to stop associating with that person. (1 Cor. 5:11) The presiding overseer should approve this announcement.

    DISASSOCIATION

    The term "disassociation" applies to the action taken by a person who, although a baptized member of the congregation, deliberately repudiates his Christian standing, rejecting the congregation by his actions or by stating that he no longer wants to be recognized as or known as one of Jehovah's Witnesses. Because he is disassociated, his situation before Jehovah is far different from that of an inactive Christian, one who no longer shares in the field ministry. An inactive person may have failed to study God's Word regularly, or because of experiencing personal problems or persecution, he may have lost his zeal for serving Jehovah. The elders as well as other concerned members of the congregation will continue rendering appropriate spiritual assistance to an inactive brother. (Rom. 15:1; 1 Thess. 5:14; Heb. 12:12) However, the person who disassociates himself by repudiating the faith and deliberately abandoning Jehovah's worship is viewed in the same way as one who is disfellowshipped. A brief announcement is made to inform the congregation, stating: "[Name of person] is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses."

    Concerning those who renounced their Christian faith in his day, the apostle John wrote: "They went out from us, but they were not of our sort; for if they had been of our sort, they would have remained with us." (1 John 2:19) For example, a person might renounce his place in the Christian congregation by his actions, such as by becoming part of a secular organization that has objectives contrary to the Bible and, hence, is under judgment by Jehovah God. (Isa. 2:4; Rev. 19:17-21) If a person who is a Christian chooses to join those who are disapproved by God, a brief announcement is made to the congregation, stating: "[Name of person] is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses." Such a person is treated in the same way as a disfellowshipped person. The presiding overseer should approve this announcement.

    REINSTATEMENT

    A disfellowshipped person may be reinstated when he gives clear evidence of repentance, demonstrating over a reasonable period of time that he has abandoned his sinful course and is desirous of having a good relationship with Jehovah and His organization. The elders are careful to allow sufficient time, perhaps many months, a year, or even longer, for the disfellowshipped person to prove that his repentance is genuine. When the body of elders receives a written plea for reinstatement, the judicial committee that disfellowshipped the person should, if possible, be the committee that speaks with the individual. The committee will evaluate the evidence of works of godly repentance on his part and decide whether to reinstate him at that time or not.

    If the person requesting reinstatement was disfellowshipped by another congregation, a local judicial committee may meet with the person and consider the plea. Thereafter, the local judicial committee will communicate with the body of elders of the congregation that disfellowshipped the individual, giving them its recommendation. The involved committees will work together in unity to ensure that all the facts are gathered and a just decision is made. However, the decision to reinstate is made by the original judicial committee of the congregation that took the disfellowshipping action. If some members of the original committee are no longer in the congregation or qualified to serve, other elders from the original congregation can be chosen to replace them.

    When the judicial committee is convinced that the disfellowshipped person is genuinely repentant and should be reinstated, an announcement of the reinstatement is made in the congregation where the individual was disfellowshipped. If the person is now in another congregation, the announcement will be made there as well. It should simply state: "[Name of person] is reinstated as one of Jehovah's Witnesses."

    WHEN UNBAPTIZED PUBLISHERS ARE WRONGDOERS

    What of unbaptized publishers who become involved in serious wrongdoing? Since they are not baptized members of the congregation, they cannot be formally disfellowshipped. However, they may not fully understand the Bible's standards, and kind counsel may help them to make straight paths for their feet.

    If an unbaptized wrongdoer is unrepentant after two elders have met with him and have tried to help him, then it is necessary to inform the congregation. A brief announcement is made, stating: "[Name of person] is no longer recognized as an unbaptized publisher." The congregation will then view the wrongdoer as a person of the world. Although the offender is not disfellowshipped, Christians exercise caution with regard to any association with him. (1 Cor. 15:33) No field service reports would be accepted from him.

    In time, an unbaptized person (adult or minor) who was removed as a publisher may wish to renew his association with the congregation and become a publisher again. In that situation, two elders would meet with him and ascertain his spiritual progress. If he has a good attitude, a Bible study may be held with him. If he progresses spiritually and eventually qualifies, a brief announcement can be made, stating: "[Name of person] is again recognized as an unbap-tized publisher."

    CASES INVOLVING MINOR BAPTIZED CHILDREN

    Serious wrongdoing on the part of minor children who are baptized should be reported to the elders. When the elders handle cases of serious sins involving a minor, it is preferable that the baptized parents of the young person be present and cooperate with the judicial committee, not attempting to shield the erring child from necessary disciplinary action. Just as in dealing with adult offenders, the judicial committee endeavors to reprove and restore the wrongdoer. However, if the young person is unrepentant, disfellowshipping action is taken.

    JEHOVAH BLESSES UNITED, CLEAN WORSHIP

    All who are associated with the congregation of God today can certainly rejoice in the rich spiritual estate that Jehovah has given to his people. Our spiritual pastures have indeed been made lush, and we have been provided with an abundance of refreshing waters of truth. We have experienced Jehovah's protective care through his theocratic arrangement under the headship of Christ. (Ps., 23; Isa. 32:1, 2) Being in the spiritual paradise in these troublesome last days has given us a feeling of security.

    By maintaining fine conduct and Christian unity as ministers of God's good news, we will continue to let the light of Kingdom truth shine forth. (Matt. 5:16) With Jehovah's blessing, we will have the joy of seeing many more people come to know Jehovah and serve with us in doing God's will.

    N.
  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    They use that card to keep people from doing things that, while scripturally acceptable, might "stumble" others. Things like listening to "bad" songs in the privacy of your own home or with a MP3 player or code-marked mini discs (which are not playable on more mainstream music systems, so no one is going to "borrow" them and find your "bad" songs), watching R-rated movies, or masturbating, can get you "marked". You can also get "marked" if you disobey the hounders (who themselves are telling you something that is against both the Bible and the Filthful and Disgraceful Slavebugger). All of which is an abuse of the system.

    It might be interesting to note that the scriptures only identify two "offenses" that legitimately warrant marking. (And in both cases, it would be unpleasant to associate too much with the person anyways.) These offenses are prying into one's affairs that should be private, and being lazy to the point of trying to get a free ride from people and unfairly exploit them (things like continually "borrowing" money). Those are the offenses that Paul was specifically referring to when mentioning "walking disorderly". In one case, someone is trying to know everything you are doing with a view of controling you; in the other, one is seeking unjust gain from you.

    Which seems that most hounders (especially upward bound ones) are guilty of one or both of these to the majority of the flock. And so is the hounder-hounder. And the organization itself.

  • passwordprotected
    passwordprotected

    What's amazing about marking, and OMG used it as an example, is that people are marked for not marrying "in the Lord". To marry in the Lord is about as close to a direct command as you'll find in the NT, yet the WTS doesn't disfellowship for this, they 'only' mark the person.

    Apostasy is, when you read Paul's words, surely only a "marking offense", no?

  • passwordprotected
    passwordprotected

    Here's a story about marking.

    A young girl in our area started dating a guy whose parents were JW and he'd studied over the years but had never been baptised. When it became time for her to marry him, she was 'marked' for not marrying in the Lord, and this caused all sorts of problems in the congregation and in her family, as you can imagine.

    Sadly, just a few short months after their wedding, he was killed in an accident.

    So, was she still marked? Afterall, she wasn't married to an 'unbeliever' anymore. How could she express regret (yes, that's what's expected of JWs who marry outside 'the truth'; they need to publicly express regret or remorse for getting married to a person who doesn't follow the Governing Body. In other words, they need to make it know where their loyalty lies; not with their spouse (with whom God yolked them together), but with the Organisation) when her husband was dead? The answer is yes, she was still marked. So, at a time when she would surely need the full support of the local congregation, all JWs were still to withhold fellowship from her.

    3 years later, her younger brother is getting married. Most in the congregation are invited to the wedding reception. But, his sister - the marked one - is going to be there! Agh! What should we do? Letters to the Society from the body of elders ensued, elders meetings were convened, and was decided that a definite ruling cannot be made. However, all appointed men and their families should be united in not going to the wedding, as there would be a marked person in attendance. This would then, in turn, set the example for the rest of 'the flock'.

    So, because this young widow who had married a non-JW years before was going to be at her brother's wedding, 95% of the local congregation did not attend the wedding.

    Such a display of balanced, Christian love.

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