LOVE REALLY SUCKS

by Saint Theresa 11 Replies latest social relationships

  • Saint Theresa
    Saint Theresa

    I ruined a real relationship with a real man that I had been with for 11 years for a JW who used me, got his rocks off, then told me to hang in there. I have lost everything for this person, and does this person care???? I doubt it. He should've never gotten involved with me to begin with if he wasn't serious in the first place. I lost everything--the only man who I can say truly did love me, my house, my car, my sanity...all for nothing. When he needed me I was there for the idiot, now I need him more than ever, and he says and I quote, "I just can't". He won't even answer his phone. And we were so close, then he went and got spiritual on me, deciding that after he slept with me countless times that it was wrong in all mighty Jehovah's eyes. Bullshit--he used me and broke my heart and ruined my life. Why did I get involved with him? Because I am a f****** idiot. I let him whirl me around his finger because I don't have a brain in my head. So what's the sense of this post? I AM PISSED. Who does these goody-two-shoes think they are? They prance around all high mighty, like I'm such worldly trash, immune to heart break, or maybe they think that we're disposable toys that they can play with as needed. I never told this idiot my true feelings, and I need to get it off my chest, it won't make a difference to him how I feel, I know.
    But I was falling in love with him. Actually I fell in love with him that night we went riding around the world in his car, as sad as this sounds, that was one of the best nights of my life, I can't remember a time that I was so happy. I would've given him the world, I would've done anything to make him happy, but I don't know what is wrong with him, he's so foolish. I am so pathetic, that I make myself sick, I lost a man who really did love and care about me, for a 3 month fling with someone too preoccupied in pleasing himself and the congregation. Well, screw the congregation, the elders can kiss my ass, and for you M.S. you gave up what could've been the best thing in your 30 yrs of depression and self pity. You said it yourself, when we were together you didn't need the antidepressants.
    But I let myself fall, I created this horrible reality of utter loneliness, but he was not an innocent by-stander, he made the first move, and came on to me. I fell for his charm all the way. I dug this grave, now I must lie in it. But for him, I see the way he flirts with little Ms. sister slut, at least she is JW, as I was not, but she flirts with everyone, and when she smiles, this gross decaying tooth smiles right on back, yuck. I am sure soon they will be playing touch and feel between the sheets soon, although, I think, since I am a member of the babylon the great rat pack, and have absolutely nothing to loose--I think I'm gonna find me an elder and have a little chat with him. I am sure getting wild and naked with a babylonian esp. outside of marriage is a very big no-no. It's like I am the devil in his eyes right now. It's me, who's heart was totally mislead then broken. He's the evil one.

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    Simon, is this anyone we already know?

  • Saint Theresa
    Saint Theresa

    Who's Simon????????????

  • ashitaka
    ashitaka

    Simon is the God of this forum.

    Seriously, though, he's the admin of the site. What's there to say? Were you married, etc.?

    Were you a JW?

    ashi

  • Saint Theresa
    Saint Theresa

    Yes, I was married to a wonderful guy. I gave it up for nothing.
    Never been a JW.

  • ashitaka
    ashitaka

    My dear, why would you leave a wonderful man, even if the JW pretended to be good as well? Wouldn't your misery be partly your fault, even though the JW now scorns you? If so, it sounds like a little justice. Your husband must have loved you, and he paid dearly for no fault of his. I don't know, hon, I think this one is your burden to carry. Can't blame the JW's for everything.

    ashi

  • larc
    larc

    Theresa,

    I am so sorry to hear your terrible story.

    There have been several women who have come here who are in relationships with JW men and we try to warn them. If another on shows up, I will bring your story up, so they see what is likely to happen. Problem is, when someone is in love it is hard to convince them that they are headed for trouble.

    If you want to get even, send a letter to the elders of his congregation and tell them what he did. Call his kingdom hall, get the names of the elders, and send one letter to each of them, certified with receipt and tell them in the letter, you are willing to testify at his judicial committee meeting.

  • Skeptic
    Skeptic

    Saint Theresa,

    Have you asked your wonderful guy if he would consider reconcilling with you? You would have to apologize, but he may want you back.

    I do have a question though. Was there a problem with your relationship of 11 years? Or did you just get the "11 year itch"? Most people do not end a good 11 year relationship easily. Perhaps it was not as good as you think. Or, perhaps it was better than you thought it was at the time.

    I hope you are able to patch things up.

    Richard

  • Mindchild
    Mindchild

    Hi Theresa,

    It wasn't pleasant to read about your painful experience. I'm certainly no fan of Jehovah's Witnesses but you could have just as easily been "played" and used by a man from any religion. Perhaps you got sucked in more because of the JW belief system but sad to say ended up being betrayed.

    I hope you move forward with your life and find love again. Maybe you will realize now that you too are a graduate from the school of hard knocks and won't fall for the same mistakes twice. You might even discover why it was that you needed to have a relationship with someone else after being with one man for 11 years as you say. I say none of this in a judging or moralistic way. I think all of us need to realize that the roles we play don't really work all the time, the role especially of finding one person and he/she being the only one for the rest of their life. How do you make love last? Perhaps you might find a surprising answer in Tom Robbin's book, Still Life With Woodpecker.

    My best wishes for your continued growth and happiness down the road.

    Skipper

  • Skeptic
    Skeptic

    Saint Theresa,

    Do we know each other? Something in your story rings a bell.

    If you have a friend named Lambchop, then I am familiar with your situation, and your former mate. I am certain if you explain to your man, he will forgive all. You will find him quite understanding, in fact. If you know me personally, you probably know this already as we both know your man very well. You can take my word on it. He would never cast your love aside easily.

    If you are not the person I think you are, approaching him and attempting reconcilation might still work. If it doesn't, what do you have to lose?

    Richard

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