by daniel-p 21 Replies latest jw friends
An idea...start an exercise routine. I used to hate to exercise and I was lucky I didn't need too for years and years. But age catches up. I exercise almost every weekday now. When I miss several days I can tell a difference in my mood and energy level.
I'm actually fairly active. Exercise most days of the week and go on hikes, etc. on the weekends. It makes an enormous difference in my mood, but the things I'm talking about are sort of more broad than that.
I've learned that we need diversions from time to time. A day trip to the mountains or camping for a couple of nights...no laptops or email allowed. Phones are for emergencies only. We're lucky to have a friend who has a boat and includes us on his list of friends to go the lake.
Even when things are smooth at home, just the mundane day in and day out can become drudgery. We like to have an event to look forward to.
It's also a motivator for getting a project done. Can't go camping if the camper isn't de-winterized or repaired. Can't go to the lake if I put off water proofing the deck and this is the only weekend to get it done for the next month.
I would scrutinize your spending--if you are going to buy a gadget that is going to cost you money (especially recurringly), ask yourself if you are really going to get that much value out of having the item. If something is going to cost you $400 upfront and $40 a month for service, ask if you are going to get that much or more value (plus the time spent using it). If you are going to get that much value out of the product (and you alone can make that decision, not someone else), then by all means get it.
However, if you realize that you are not going to get your money's worth of total value out of the product, then getting it is only going to be a waste of money. If you are going to get $500 of value out of your $500 iPhone, it is worth it. But, if a $35 cell phone is going to provide the same value, you are wasting the $465 difference and should just stick with a regular cell phone. This also goes for other material things--if a $400 TV is ample, and you are not going to get an extra $3600 value out of a $4,000 set, then stick with the $400 set and save the $3600 for whatever will give you $3600 worth of value. If you are not able to use the extra features in a $500 printer, a $150 one will probably do nicely and save you $350 in value.
On the flip side, getting low end crap is almost always a waste of money. If you get a $10 blanket, it might last a year before needing replacement. A $60 one would last you 20 years or more (plus being more comfortable), saving you $140 during its lifetime. A $60 dish rack might give you the extra $52.01 worth of value if it fits your needs better than the $7.99 special, is easier to clean, or lasts longer. And there might be personal factors that will give you added value--it might remind you of a person, place, or thing that, for that alone might be worth the extra $200 for you.
Only you can decide whether something is worth the price to you. Invariably, when someone tells you to spend indiscriminately, it is them (not you) that gets the extra value. If they are telling you to do without (without knowing how much value you would have gotten), chances are that they want your money and time. One thing that is almost never worth anything is field circus supplies, field circus itself, or donating anything to the Worldwide Pedophile Defense Fund. Cut out boasting session attendance, Worldwide Pedophile Defense Fund donations, and field circus, and you will probably simplify your life more than any one step you can take beyond that.
Since your work seems to consist of sitting at a computer most of the day, what would be the chances of you being able to work from home, either part of the week or full time? It might be worth running the idea past your employers.
If you were able to do this, you could get your work done nice and early and do some other stuff with the extra leisure time (from not travelling to/from work) and any downtime you have rather than wasting it being tied to a desk all day - if you do get this opportunity though, make sure that you set aside a strict space for WORK and don't allow it to encroach on HOME - or vice versa.
Wizard, I like your thinking. To a large degree, this is the way we operate. I can't stand most new gadgetry, have never even considered getting an iPhone, and will be getting rid of my cell phone this month and replacing it with a pre-paid phone.
Since your work seems to consist of sitting at a computer most of the day, what would be the chances of you being able to work from home, either part of the week or full time? It might be worth running the idea past your employers.
If you were able to do this, you could get your work done nice and early and do some other stuff with the extra leisure time (from not travelling to/from work) and any downtime you have rather than wasting it being tied to a desk all day - if you do get this opportunity though, make sure that you set aside a strict space for WORK and don't allow it to encroach on HOME - or vice versa.
Sademo, you're spot-on with this. I have actually thought about this before, and even pitched it to my boss one time. I seemed a little reluctant at the time, but a lot of things have changed at the firm and I think he might go for this eventually. He just hinted to me the other day that we'll probably go down to a 4-day workweek, which would be awesome.
When I am involved in developing a project I work from home with occasional outside meetings. These projects can go on for months and I am paid well and enjoy my work. But when I am between projects, as I am now, I have a hard time filling the time in such a way so that at the end of the day I feel like I've earned my rations. I can also relate to undercover in having a liqour cabinet conveniently located.
Simple Living and Lifestyle Choices
I'd love to get a pilot's license and fix up old boat so I can get back out on the water again like I used to before my son was born. Those are just luxuries, of course. But my life is probably too complicated with all the pots I have on the burner.
Yeah. Simplicity was for my JW days so that they could complicate my life. Screw that.
What the hell am i missing? I have a cushy job, i make a decent living, i have a very easy and relatively carefree life. But it's driving me insane.
Respectfully, I think maybe you are bored. You seem to be very intelligent and capable and are thus are naturally at risk of boredom. Possibly you need a challenge, a project, a goal. You need to complicate your life with something that excites you. You've got two basic choices: boredom or some anxiety.
BTS
I'd love to get a pilot's license and fix up old boat so I can get back out on the water again like I used to before my son was born. Those are just luxuries, of course. But my life is probably too complicated with all the pots I have on the burner.
One of my ongoing fears is to get into a life situation where any meaningful change is impossible. Kids will come soon, and how much harder will it be to really get to where I want to be in life? It seems that it only gets harder. I guess this is why I'm more and more obsessing over simplicity, so that change will be easier to make.
Possibly you need a challenge, a project, a goal. You need to complicate your life with something that excites you. You've got two basic choices: boredom or some anxiety.
I think you're pretty much dead-on with this. You're right, I am bored, bored out of my mind most of the time. My work is challenging, but not in the rewarding kind of way. It's just tedious research and analysis with no tangible results when a project is done.
I suppose this feeling will abate a little when my last quarter of grad school starts back up. On second thought, I always seem to get like this when I have a long break from school. Work just doesn't cut it, when it comes to keeping me challanged. School less and less. Plus, it'll be over pretty soon anyway.
We are poorly adapted to the modern life. Get school out of the way, cover your bases, and try something new, even if it is on the side. School got boring for me too, towards the end. Of course, I have never gotten to graduate level (yet). Good luck with the new family, it will definitely engage you and enrich you. And don't obsess too much about the coming kids. I did. I've learned better, and you adapt after a year or two. Things are more difficult when we try to fit into a mold of what a traditional parent is supposed to be. Kids just need a lot of love, they grow up fine if they get that. they'll grow up a lot happier if you are happy, rather than static, miserable, and self-painted into a corner. Also, and this seems superfluous in your case, don't get into big financial obligations, they limit your freedom.
BTS
I think this song may describe your ennui, right down to the cell phone use at the end ;) :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfoR_PwqR6I
I'm feeling a bit the same way. I almost feel like I need to do everything differently, just to change the pace completely.
