I can't feel sorry for the elders. There is some ego that makes them capable of taking on so much that they have no right to.
Do Jehovahs Witnesses shoot their own wounded?
by paul from cleveland 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Luo bou to
My ex is bipolar and had the courage to seek medical help despite the fact it was frowned upon by the Org and her peers. One time she was suicidal and took an overdose.. told me what she had done and finished up in hospital. I rang her psych for advice etc and knowing the possible consequences did not involve the Elders. Later after she tried again.... she did not tell me but instead she told an Elder. He kept it to himself and did tell me. I knew her history. I was her husband. Can you imagine the possible consequences of this ignorant bastard withholding this information.
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paul from cleveland
"I am curious if you don't mind sharing, how did your family and JC Elders respond to you after having been diagnosed?"
The elders have never contacted me since I've been disfellowshipped. I don't know what, if anything, they know about my situation. I haven't contacted them either because, right after the whole experience, I felt this can't be Jehovah's organization. It just can't be... so I never went back. Like I said, I didn't feel bitter... I actually felt free. (Until about a month ago, but that's another story) Also, I felt that if I had another episode, I may be disfellowshipped again. I have had several since then.
Regarding my family, they still shun me. They know about my situation but can't, in good conscience, talk to me unless I'm reinstated. I don't blame them... they think they're doing the right thing. Plus, I'm sure they feel it's not worth risking their eternal future to talk to their brother. In their mind, they're helping me. I might be doing the same thing if I hadn't had this experience.
(Ynot, I've already returned your email several days ago)
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beksbks
My gosh Paul, do you still believe? I mean I've seen a full out manic phase, if that is what you were disfellowshipped for, ...................!! But as for you, that's a whole different story.
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wantstoleave
Paul, thanks for sharing :) And I too am sorry you had to put up with the rotten treatment from the elders.
There was a case here many years ago, very similar in fact. The man in question was Df, and has never been back. I'm sure it goes on much more than we realise. The fact is, not many in the organisation recognise mental problems as anything other than a 'state of mind' and 'something you can control', when clearly it is beyond the control of the sufferer. The elders simply say 'wait on Jehovah to fix it in the new system'. It's a cop out so they don't have to face the issue and help the person in the right way.
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paul from cleveland
I don't know how to answer that. For years I've felt free. I've felt that if I could be disfellowshipped for the reason I was, how many other people are disfellowshipped for reasons beyond their control? For it to be the truth (in my mind), it has to work for everyone, not just some of the people. People can't just fall through the cracks.
Lately, however, I've begun to have doubts. I've become afraid that maybe I'm just wrong. Perhaps I'm using my experience as an excuse not to go back. When you're raised as a Witness, the fear is so ingrained. Sometimes I think, 'I'm not going back because I shouldn't be serving God out of fear'. Then I think 'I should go back because if these are the last days, and they parallel the days of Noah, I'm supposed to be afraid'.
My thoughts are going in circles... I don't know if I'm starting another episode or my thoughts are legitimate.
btw, I don't feel the elders treatment was rotten. I just think what happened to me wouldn't have happened in God's true organization. (I know I'm just one person but if the hairs on our head are numbered...)
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oompa
welcome to the club paul.....i want to study with you...........oompa
but my thoughts no longer go in circles in regard to if these people have a real truth from god to share......
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paul from cleveland
I have to mention this also. (more details on why I'm considered apostate) I not only told the elders at the Judicial Committee that I was Jesus, I said my first act at Armageddon was to destroy the Jehovah's Witnesses since they were the Great Harlot of Revelation, etc. etc. I was going on and on like this... just crazy talk. The presiding overseer just put up his hand and said "Stop! What do you want... to be disfellowshipped or disassociated?"
After they disfellowshipped me, I got on a plane to Washington to 'see president Clinton' and tell him my 'views'. I wouldn't wear shoes because 'Jesus wouldn't have to wear shoes'. (I'm sure if this was after 9/11, I wouldn't have gotten so far) I did many many other crazy things that I don't even remember (people just told me later). Finally the police caught me when I was running down the street ripping my clothes off. I was crying, telling them that now I was the antichrist. They handcuffed me and took me to the nearest hospital, but since I didn't have insurance, they had to take me to the county hospital. I don't remember much, but it wasn't very nice. After I was properly medicated for a couple weeks, I was stablized. I felt like I had awoken from a very bad dream.
I think my family still believes I'm really an apostate.
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wantstoleave
How sad ((hugs))....
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paul from cleveland
I laugh about it now. It's all so ridiculous.