Please help!! (page 2)

mamashel6

I got it thank you yknot. They are not the elders who DF'd us, but they say i am an apostate and wont speak with me.

AK - Jeff

Welcome.

The 'my way or the highway' mentality is so powerful among Jw's, and also I understand among a few other groups that advocate that they have the 'truth', an exclusive pathway to God.

Good advice above. I will not add to except with a positive hope for your future. Stick around here, lots of good people with similar problems.

Jeff

yknot

So let me get this straight, you hubby says only Elders, if you agree they refuse to counsel yall as a couple because you have been 'stumbled' by an apostate virus!

Have you asked you husband 'what now', pointing out yall need counseling and yall have been rejected by his Elders.

Put the ball back in his court and keep it there until a counselor can be engaged!

nelly136

ok i'm a brit sooo

**He has threatened to take our 3 sons by the neck if they did not obey him and come to the meetings. **

is that figuratively speaking from frustration or is he threatening actual bodily violence?

he may not feel he has any spiritual reason to leave but a solicitor/lawyer doesnt deal in spiritual, and legally he may have no choice but to leave should you feel that you and or your children are being threatened physically or mentally in your own home.

you dont deserve to be subjected to that behaviour, look out for you and your kids and sod him.

Bystander39

I'm not a brit, but I agree with nelly136. I just looked at this thread and couldn't believe that it took until nelly before anyone picked up on that phrase. This sounds like abuse - but since it's difficult in this medium to read expression, and intents, I'm not stating outright that this may be the case. It is enough, though, that you might want to re-examine it. Definitely something to bring up early in counseling, whether with him or not.

mamashel6

Yes he said he would bodily take them to the meetings. But he has since spoken to his father who is an elder also, and his father told him that he was wrong to be like that. Number one, my sons are very large, the 14 yr old is 6' 1 and 280, the 16 is 6'4 and 235 and the 18 is 6'3 and 230. lol

So needless to say, i dont think he will be dragging anyone anywhere. BUT, i did however tell him if he gets a burr up his butt again to try and do something like that, i would have the police called immediately.

It is truely like living with someone who has lost their mind. I think I already know the out come of this, but he wanted me to have scriptural reason for leaving him. Outside of committing adultry, i dont know what i would say. And dont think i havnt been tempted. But I know thats not the answer. lol

mamashel6

nelly136

phew, wow, well at least it sounds like you've homegrown a set of bodyguards there

well if he wants scripturally free thats not your problem. sounds like you've tried to accommodate his wishy washy self to the best of your ability

you cant do more than that. and seriously why the heck should you?

when it gets to the point when you look at em and you cant imagine spending the next month with em (let alone the next ten years) then you gotta do whats good for you and yours.

we're not much different in age so i'm guessing you already know deep down if you want to keep trying or just be done with him.

good luck with whatever choice you make

yknot

Wow!

You got some big boys!

So what is his solution now that the Elders refuse to counsel yall?

jamiebowers

i really just want to end it.

Then, by all means, go! With your kids playing sports and vying for scholarships, your husband has no right to disrupt the lives of his family. If there are bank accounts, take half, get a place and find an attorney to file for child and spousal support and divorce. Maybe reality slapping him in the face will cause him to cool his heels for awhile!

Please help!!

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