AE, you like all of us, live in your own little world. I have mine, you have yours, we all do....
Thus, I am not offended by the fact that concerns of a personal nature matter to you. (its a little bit self involved, but I was like you once on that score... but I changed) Since JWN is a part of my little world that I include in my life, I feel I can share the following observations with you, as you openly put matters in your little world on here for public consumption.
You seem very confused, and very ill informed about Jehovah's Witnesses. Others, because of your teflon coated ability to have logical thoughts bounce off you, have tried to label you as a troll, etc. I am glad that Simon has stopped that.
But that doesn't give you free reign to make this forum different from what it clearly is. You say
nice to have understanding ones on the forum, thats what this forum is all about :)
And I agree. I for one understand those who have been tragically hurt, and permanently altered thanks to being part of this cult you are in. Because the GB has demonized the internet, and strongly implies that JW's are to stay away from internet discussions about JW's (hell, JW's can't even have private bible studies without the exclusive use of WT literature) your musings draw a definite crowd here because of your claims to being a JW. To that, you are entitled to represent yourself however you like. But typically, what you say about how Jehovah's Witnesses live and believe is very wrong, and that is why there is such anger directed to you at times.
This thread is different from what you normally put out there. If there is one thing internet forums are very useful for, it is that our words and opinions are there for all to see.
Like all of us AE, you have consequences for what you write. This forum is not run by Jehovah's Witnesses for Jehovah's Witnesses. This forum is about the discussion of Jehovah's Witnesses. As I already said, since JW's are taught to stay away, few will come here. When they do, they do it Nicodemus style, under the cover of night. They don't need the trouble of announcing they are here and potentially get in trouble.
Has it ever occurred to you, have you ever noticed, that not a single Jehovah's Witness has ever supported you, while instead, you have been contradicted at almost every turn regarding your presentation of Jehovah's Witness lifestyle and dogma? It doesn't matter to me what your opinion of this little fact is, but it's a great question to ask yourself: Where are my brothers and sisters to defend me? Why am I the only one who says the things I do? If JW's are allowed on the internet, then where are my brothers and sisters?
Your views have been publically dis-proven, and you have been tacitly thrown under the bus by the deafening silence of your brothers and sisters.
So why do I write this on a tread where you say that you are changing? And then ask
But i really believe that due to things that have badly and wrongly been allowed to take place etc its moulded me a little different to how I was. Unsure if thats a good thing or not? Am i being misled by satan or has it been a re moulding for the better.
...followed by
Did any of you feel like this before leaving? (hope not, never want to leave) but just want to have serious answers please......im really asking as a friend...please :)
then I am merely taking you up on your invitation for a very serious answer. Your own words tell me that you are very confused and ill informed as to what a proper JW does. You certainly talk like a JW. Yet, you fail to "get" that your presented lifestyle is not something any JW or former JW can relate to. To put it bluntly, if I could have stayed a pioneer or elder and posted about my true feelings on the internet, do you think I would have left? Hell no! But I couldn't point out that the king had no clothes on, and so I resigned before they could fire me. (that is one piece of advice I give to you...)
But you say you are changing. You certainly don't need the permission of anyone here to do so.
Jehovah's Witnesses teach that to follow your own heart is to give into Satanic influence, so personally, from the JW point of view, you are being influenced by Satan.
And I am serious as a heart attack when I say that.
How you choose to look at yourself therefore is the ultimate test for you. "We" on JWN ultimately don't matter. You are the one who has to look at yourself in the mirror each day, deal with the fact that your thoughts could possibly be influenced by "satan", or perhaps realize that like any person, you simply have the right to be you, to occupy your own space, and have your own thoughts.
That challenge is up to you. But you don't need to be a JW to be who you really are. As those who happily are no longer JW's due to the falsehoods this cult teaches can gladly attest to, our changes for the better included leaving this destructive cult. Where your life takes you is ultimately in your hands, and to a large degree, the success of your life will depend on how honest you can be with yourself.
"You can lead a horse to water....."
