Goodbye bible creeps, Hello 2002 :)

by unclebruce 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce
    Of interest to me is if I move back 70 years from 1914 I am getting the year 1844 which was a known date for the end of the world.
    Times .... 1844 + 70 years + 70 years + 7 years + 7 years
    So we have the year 1998 AD finally. But what happens if we split the 70 weeks as Daniel 9.25 shows we may extend time !!!
    Daniel 9.25:
    70 weeks ( which is 70 times 7 what Jesus was saying in matthew 18.22) can be looked at in another way -----

    7O weeks= 7 weeks + 62 weeks + 1 week
    To make a sense from these weeks we must transform them according to the rule I gave in my original (starting post on this thread):
    long years,short years,long days,short days
    We know that 7 weeks mean:
    2520 years (which can be both literal or symbolic covering any long period of time) + 7 years (2520 days) + 2520 days + 7 days + 7 days

    62 weeks= 62 x 7 = 434 days = 360 + 60 = 14 days
    1 week = 7 days
    So we add to August,10,1999 90 days,60 days,14 days as explained earlier and we add 90 days ( a season) and a time ( a lunar year) to come to the April,7,2001.
    ### 360 days: August,15,1998 - August,10,1999
    Since there were two calendars in Israel with a half-year difference we take it into consideration and add a half year ( 183 or 182 days) and that is why we come to October,6,2001.
    And now we add 77 days for 77 years; 1914-1991 and 10 days for 1991-2001 and come to January,1,2002 !!!

    The above is from OBVES but could just as well come from the keyboard of YoYo, YouKnow, Bableman/J92/LargeSky, Dungsmere, Shallby or any number of self made internut fundy bible scholars. Well the clock has just ticked us over into 2002 and again the predicted end of the world hasn't come, the horses aren't wading through rivers of blood, the birds aren't out feasting on the flesh of kings and I ain't here earnestly rump humping the nearest female with the Angels bashing at the door and threatening to send me down if I don't show 'em my mark in the foreheadskin.

    Be nice if OBVES took some personal responsibility for his insanity and rushed screaming into the sea filled with deep gloom and remorse but alas, i have the feeling the sad fellow's barefaced bullshit and mythical number crunching won't end with this nights New Year celebrations.

    Give him a 24 hour day and he'll be up leaping from scrapture to rapture flapping his arms, preaching doom and apocalypso, enthralling us once again with his valiant leaps of faith and logic, huffing, puffing, panting in self flageolation in the fine tradition of christians past. So be it there is no cure. (tho me thinks there be something perverse and French about such as whip themselves for thier own amusement!)

    Lord God Jah Jesus Christ relieve us i pray from the myopic fanaticism and mind numbing stupidity of your followers .. no wonder you ain't never comming back, this year or any other.

    My New Years Resolution: "I will not argue with fruitloops"

    2001 was fun, may 2002 be better! unclebruce

    HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL

    PS: I'm posting this a few hours early .. so sure am I that Jesus, Judge Rutherford and the 143,999 others ain't riding into town tonight .. i'm quaffing champers till my head drifts blissfully on the new year tide.

  • WildHorses
    WildHorses

    If last night is any indication of how the New Year will be for me. wooooooooooooooooooweeeeeeeeeeeee. Bring it on! he he


    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent
    Eleanor Roosevelt
  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    Dear sweet lilacs,

    tonight may you sin 'till your lustful romantic womanly urges are fully sated .. as you know there's been a decline in the quality of men since Adam of Eden .. so grab the nearest one and tango till dawn .. if i make it to hell first i'll be waiting playfully with outstretched arms lol. xxx

    geez i'm a longwinded ol' fart - Have fun!

    unc off to the beach ..

  • jayhawk
    jayhawk
    My New Years Resolution: "I will not argue with fruitloops"


    Me either, Fruit Loops don't debate very well anyway.

    Now Grape Nuts can be challenging.

    "Hand me that whiskey, I need to consult the spirit."-J.F. Rutherford

    Jeremy's Hate Mail Hall Of Fame.
    http://hometown.aol.com/onjehovahside/ and [email protected]

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    UB

    Some Christian noses should start growing any minute now. Heh heh

    SS

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    Happy Uncle,

    Loved every word of this post. This one bares repeat;

    ***Give him a 24 hour day and he'll be up leaping from scrapture to rapture flapping his arms, preaching doom and apocalypso, enthralling us once again with his valiant leaps of faith and logic, huffing, puffing, panting in self flageolation in the fine tradition of christians past.***

    Like Scrooge of ole, we cannot seem to divest ourselves of these nasty gouls of fundyisims, they keep popin up all over the world, in one form or another. Haunting creatures they are, with tiding's of 'do or die'. Well its gotta be hard for them, they get hoarse preaching and singing, but never get any relief. Have to wonder why they don't just choose to drop the whole 'ball and chain' act eh?

    Happy new year ya old fart!

    DBear

  • jayhawk
    jayhawk

    Uncle Bruce,
    I hope you did not mind my previous post. I hope you have a great new year.

    As for me, I hope to have a great year filled with as much "fluff" posts I can get away with.

    "Hand me that whiskey, I need to consult the spirit."-J.F. Rutherford

    Jeremy's Hate Mail Hall Of Fame.
    http://hometown.aol.com/onjehovahside/ and [email protected]

    I noticed my smile did not smile.

  • zerubberballs
    zerubberballs

    Yes Jayhawk You did offend me terribly .. don't think a man used to decifering the sublties of ancient texts would be so easily fooled by your not so covert attempt to goad my passionate dislike of all things star wars! lol

    Lord Coco pops, may I never be a Jedi and all my arguments be like a chocolate milkshake only fluffy

    ===

    have a good one Dannybear .... SS ... Jayhawk .. long live the honest fluff of real men and may the serious bullshit artists of gloom get sucked up thier own dark tunnels of crud. lol .. something like that .. should i name names? .. nah you blokes who recon "this means war" know who you are .. amatures, wannabees, couldabins, little Napolians, thesauris heads, hollow hearts revealed by lack of love, panicing when cornered and unapologetic in defeat, blinded by egos and agendas out of control, not knowing what they really want or how to achieve it, hollow men not really here. Happy New Year to the puff posters. lol.

  • FreePeace
    FreePeace

    Hey UB,

    I'm sorry, but you and everyone in your part of the world have been destroyed by God. He is working His way across the time zones, and it won't be long 'til we're all toast in America.

    It's been good knowing ya'. It's also been good living without the BORGanization for the past 3 years too.

    I best get ready for my one last act of defiance against God. It has something to do with my middle finger.

    Bye cruel world!

    FreePeace
    "The World is my country, and to do good, my religion." --Thomas Paine
    TruthQuest: http://beam.to/truthquest
    Who Am I? -How to Reinvent Yourself After Leaving the WTS

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Thanks Uncle Rubber

    May you huff/fluff/puff on for many sunlit years to come!

    :)SS:)

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