My method may not work for you. My wife was/is firmly entrenched. She couldn't care less about the history and doctrines. She just "knows" that it's "the truth." So she wasn't going to come out with me. I just hit them with a ton of bricks out of the blue after managing to miss "some" meetings for work. The ton of bricks was a letter stating doubts. It was carefully worded enough to not be "apostate" but it was also forward enough that they became afraid that my doubts might be contagious. The letter was a resignation as an elder, saying that I did not "know" the faithful and discreet slave as the mags. suggested (several quotes) and that I was putting more and more focus into making sure that I had a decent retirement in "this system of things" as the FDS has left me wondering that I would grow old and die before Armageddon. I also resigned from the school instantly. They told me they needed Bethel approval of my resignation, so I told them to get it but to consider me done from the moment I handed them the letter. After that, I faded out quickly and refused to meet with the elders. They gave up quickly as they were afraid of what I could say.
The C.O. came and tried to bully me. I bullied him harder. He totally blew our meeting by starting out saying he didn't have much time to talk to me because he had a dinner appointment. I told him to go enjoy the 99 and forget about the 1 [lost sheep].
Standard advice is to step aside for work or depression. Despite your current conditions, depression is easy to establish. If you see a doctor for any reason whatsoever, you are "depressed and seeing a doctor." If you even watch a television show about a therapist/shrink (although actually going to one at least once is better than tuning in to Dr. Phil) you are "seeing a specialist because of your depression." They hate that stuff. If you swallow any pill, even a vitamin, you are "taking medication and are depressed." This can come about quickly. You can even say that your wife knows little about it and you would appreciate keeping anything you say confidential. (It will spread like wildfire that you are depressed and your marriage is shakey.)
First ask for a reduction in theocratic assignments, then call at the last minute to cancel some, stating illness or whatever. Then say that you have let the brothers down and need to step aside from all responsibilities. Once you do this, you could expand your fade saying that your depression isn't getting better.