Child Abuse.

creativhoney

A question, maybe a dumbass one. but I am reading about scandal, cover up and two witness policy. - most of the cases seem to be not by the parent, but a trusted brother.

my question is this, - even if the elders might skirt round the issue, and come up with all this mouth of two witnesses stuff, why cant the parent simply go to the police - in this are they just as accountable? and are they plain thick?

I know if anyone had touched my children, believe me, there would be no middle man involved. I would be straight to the authorities.

wantstoleave

Yes, going to the police would be any parents first thought usually, but in the religion, they see the elders as well, God in effect....or at the very least, policemen. So their first thoughts are to go to the elders, get their assistance in the matter. I guess they view the elders as their justice system. I always remember my mum saying that if it happened to her kids, she would go to the police first. Depends on the person really, and how much faith they put in the elders being God like and able to sort it out. Also, some may not want to bring reproach on Jehovah's name. You know, that kind of thought process takes place.

If it were me, I would go to the police in a nano second!

creativhoney

Wantstoleave, seems you have your head screwed on. - For those of us that still kept in touch with the outside world while 'still in' we managed to have things much more in perspective I believe.

There seems to be a complete naivety amongst some. - My ex husband was spending time with a brother in his cong who took a shine to my kids. - bear in mind I am DFd and don't have any input on who they see in my exes cong. -

Now don't get me wrong, I am NOT accusing this man of anything, and he did nothing, so I don't want to sully him, but this is about vigilance. - he started to buy them gifts, coats, shoes. - my ex told me he had taken them to the trafford centre and bought them presents. - I immediately expressed my concern and disagreement - my ex said these words..

Don't be silly Andi, he's a Jehovah's Witness.

I just stared at him. Agog.

when they started to recieve text messages from him - which I saw on my sons mobile, I contacted my ex, and told him in no uncertain terms to tell this man not to text my children, -

again - he said I was being over the top, he was just friendly and harmless. - now I am sure this is probably the case, but I told him that it was inappropriate that an old man was texting young boys phones and it had to stop, as did the gifts.

it stopped. - I think my ex realised when I told him, that actually it was a bit weird.

my point is, some will go along with this kind of thing - my boys really needed coats, shoes, shirts etc, - but I was not happy for them to be spending time with an old fella who I had never laid eyes on and then trust them because they are a "Jehovah's Witness'

dumb and naive.

life is to short

I cannot understand it myself. We had three pedophiles in our hall. I told one mom who was not informed and she went to the elders. I got into huge trouble for telling this mom that the brother was a registered level two sex offender. It was public information all the mom had to do was go to the cop shops we have and look up his name to make sure what I was telling her was true.

No this mom went to the elders who told her yes this brother was a sex offender but they assured her that he was totally safe to be around kids and that it was all a miscarriage of justice that he went to prison. The man raped an eight year old child and was in prison for eight years. Miscarriage of justice. Yeh right. The only miscarriage of justice is not informing parents.

Well I got into huge trouble, the JW mom let her little girl sit with a different child molester and his family for a couple of weeks after I told her and she hates me now. Pedophiles are free to be around kids in any hall. No one is to know. Only the elders and not even all of them know who a convicted child molester is.

And I am the one casing divisions in the hall.

wantstoleave

You did the right thing...that was alarming! Plus, that man was stupid to put himself in that situation. Why on earth would someone in this day and age leave themself open for something like that? Boggles the mind. I'm glad you persisted with your ex and it stopped

I've learnt that when alarm bells go off in your head, or you get a 'weird' feeling...then it's best to trust your instincts. Even if it seems a harmless situation, it's best not to subject oneself to it, just in case. You did good

creativhoney

thanks Wantstoleave :) I think its better to err on the side of caution and be vigilant. of course not all generous old men are pedos, but some are, and if its entirely inappropriate for brothers and sisters to be alone, why not apply the same vigilance to children, people of the same sex etc.

I mean according to them, we are all struggling not to have sex all the time. - its funny how their rules on chaperoning and being appropriate, just assume everyone is straight and no one is a child molester.

and lifeistooshort, - good for you, I would have done the same thing. all you did was cause them some adminstration and damage control. thats what you got in trouble for xx

wantstoleave

LITS....how awful!!! I have young kids and have recently told my mum though that under no circumstances is my son allowed to go to the toilet at the hall on his own (I don't go anymore). Usually he'd go with me, as I don't have a partner, because no way I was letting him in the male toilets on his own. But I found out the other week my mum had let him go on his own! My sister told me, on purpose as she agrees with me, and mum got so mad! I outright told her 'no more!'. We have to be vigilent with our kids, no matter where we are and especially at the hall where we have NO clue who the offenders are.

blondie

Parents are told if they go to the authorities and there is no established "fact" of guilt by 2 eyewitnesses, that they could be charged with slander. Or at best the elders don't even suggest they go to the secular authorities but to depend on the elders to "handle" it. Some good reading on this is in Barbara Anderson's information or Silentlambs. Or perhaps here for a summary:

http://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/paedophilia.php

Actually, many non-jw parents are as ignorant to the world of the pedophile. It is good for parents to educate themselves. One sad point is that most children are molested by relatives or close friends/neighbors of the family.

life is to short

No man should be texting a child. That is just wrong. You were right on to be worried. You truly cannot trust any JW. The elders are told not to tell parents. One of the sex offenders in the hall I went to is not a registered sex offender. He missed the dead line of having to register because he did his crime before that law went into affect.

He is really scary. I got his court records and police records as the elders would not believe me that he even raped children. He was involved with my sister is how I knew he was a child molester. The elders were so mad that I got public records. Hello they are called PUBLIC RECORDS it is legal for me to do that. It was like was breaking the law or something to the elders.

In fact the elders are breaking the law to allow sex offenders to hold and be around children. At least in my state it is against the law but no one really knows that. If I had known I would have called the police on the elders. The elders could have gotten in more trouble then even the pedophile.

This whole thing is so maddening and very upsetting. But the friends listen to the elders as if it were Jehovah speaking Himself.

life is to short

btt

Child Abuse.

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