Did YOU Disturb The Consciences Of Others?

by minimus 29 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Finally-Free

  Sure. Every breath I took offended the conscience of someone, and I was getting counseled for everything. I eventually adopted a more militant attitude. If I was counseled I'd hold out a bible and say, "show me from here or shut up". When commended for shaving off my moustache I'd grow it back. When counseled for having a bright tie I bought a flourescent one. When counseled for leaving my ladder on my car while out in service I sold the car and bought a 2 seater van with a nice roof rack. The ladder then had a new permenent home. The added bonus was that I no longer had to take whining publishers™ out in service™ with me. Instead, me and a MS would do a return visit to Bert and Ernie's bar where we'd get shitfaced and flirt with hot waitresses.

  The elders did not consider me "maleable" and were probably glad to see me leave the cult.

  W
• 

  minimus

  Wiz makes a good point. These are "tricks to the unwritten rules". Basically, ANYTHING is applicable.
• 

  Jadeen

  So people try to find things to be offended over. I offended people by wearing boots (in the winter) to the hall. I should have brought along a pair of dress shoes. I wore tights under my skirt (winter again) and I was told that I should have worn a longer skirt to hide the tights. I was told that I should "do something" with my hair. I guess washed and brushed wasn't good enough.
• 

  undercover

  These are "tricks to the unwritten rules". Basically, ANYTHING is applicable.

  Standard cult practice. Individuality bad, conforming to group standards(as set out by the leadership) good. When the leadership can't be everywhere and enforce all the rules, set it up so that peer pressure makes everyone in the group to conform.

  There is no police, no guards, no survelliance, no hidden mics...just the pressure to conform and the threat of someone ratting you out.
• 

  troubled mind

  Yes i was a stumbler ! When adults act like whiney children I really don't care to much .

  example: For a short time I worked with a sister in her interior design business . A few times I would drive us to the job in my own car and she would be 'stumbled ' because of the radio station I liked to listen to She would try to change the channel or turn off my radio ...until one day I put my hand in the way ,and told her" In my car it is my music .Don't touch the radio again ." (i said it in a kind way with a smile )

  According to the Elders I stumbled someone in the hall because as part of my job I decorated a light pole in front of the store with a scarecrow .......When they told me I laughed at them and then said," OH wait are you serious ??"

  I stumbled somebody because I had little ceramic lighted houses displayed in my kitchen (year round mind you ) and I decorated according to the season fall , winter ,ect.... nothing holiday just seasonal . Two Elders came to our home over this one ! I told them I wasn't doing anything wrong and that I did not intend to change how I decorated ...again with a smile and kindness in my voice

  We also were stumbling blocks because we allowed our kids to do BMX racing ,go to concerts and wear clothes they liked to school ....
• 

  LatinxJW

  To me, the whole idea of stumbling others was just another form of control. It was a way to keep you from doing things they didn't want you to do, but had no scriptural basis for forbidding.

  So very true, when I sat down and spoke to my children about getting re-married. The first words out of their mouth were that they wanted to be in the wedding party. Needless to say after their mother and the borg got wind of it they no longer wanted to even attend, why because they did not want to stumble anyone since I was DF'd. This was 5 years after separation, it was heartbreaking not having my children there.
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  carla

  By 'disturbing the conscience' do you mean make them think? yes.
• 

  parakeet

  If by "others," you mean dubs, I certainly hope so.
• 

  ninja

  I was like walty (finally free)....every breath I took disturbed them.......until a brother gave me listerine mouthwash as a gift............

  now I have that ring of confidence......ding

  ninjamintybreath
• 

  Nexus

  Although there is scriptual council in 1 Corintians to support this principle of 'not stumbing others' in the same book it talks about how 'all things are lawful' and basicly doing what you think is ok for you to do. (ok I am paraphrasing a bit here). At the same time the letters in the bible are full of reminders to be reasonable towards others.

  So yea, I do think it is right that we try not to offend others, but at the same time, and this is something the WBTS seem to overlook, is that in the same book it tells us not to judge each other. So why is it that everyone keeps on being so offended by things? My only experience of this is my hair. I've been growing it for the last 5 years and when I expressed an interest in joining the ministry school, the elders told me that some people wouldn't feel comfortable with someone with long hair speaking to them from the platform.

  Now please explain to me this. How is it that when I am talking to them face to face, everyone seems so happy to talk to me and I don't seem to cause any offence to anyone. But if i were to suddenly gain 2 feet in height my hair suddenly causes offence? Yes the world in the kingdom hall is well and truly mad if you believe what the society would tell you. (oh and I didn't cut my hair, I have no truck for people who tell me how I have to look)