Welcome, Juci!
I like your style; it seems you know more about the Scriptures than your husband does!
LOL.
Sylvia
New (non Witness) here
by juci32 24 Replies latest jw friends
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garyneal
juci,
Welcome to the forum. Our circumstances are similar. My wife is an unbaptized publisher and I think that is the one thing that is working in our favor right now (the unbaptized part). We have similar exchanges (I've even posted some on this board) and it did not take me long to realize that she is not interested in facts that undermine her neat packaged theology. She has lots of family in the bOrg and she is a very family oriented person. So I think she is more interested in becoming a witness to please the family, especially her mom.
While her sister is also an unbaptized witness, she is currently not active. Her sister even nailed it on the head when she told me that they seem like a bunch of 'mind numb robots.' Of course, her sister and my wife also said that they dreamed of being with a JW man so you can bet that if her sister settles down, expect her to return to the bOrg.
I consider myself a Christian but I find my devotion not as strong as it probably should be. However, by not being such a devout Christian, it gives me clarity to see both sides of the situation. I guess, in a sense, that is good but if I had been a devout Christian, I may also be married to one so who knows. All I know is what am I to do with my life as it is now?
My wife and I also agreed that we not try to 'change' one another. I guess in a way she is holding up her end of the bargain though I do wonder how her religion will affect my family. I remember praying and recall being told to simply love her for her and everything else will work out. I will also admit, our situation is probably not as intense (yet) as yours since she is unbaptized and somewhat unsure of her faith at times. However, when I challenge the WTS (in attempts to free her) she 'digs in deep' and defends her faith with all her might. Now I just let it go for the most part. I guess if she did not seem to express how 'torn' she is at the holidays, I would not feel so compelled to haul out facts about the society. Then again, I needed a WTS detox myself so my advice to you is don't get to deep into thinking that they may be on to something. You're doing the right thing researching them and coming here.
I think for me, what may (or may not) get to her and her family is when I say that God is working in my life too. It also helps when you can back it up with scripture. Sure, they may believe that Satan is working in my life but Christ says that good fruit does not come from a corrupt tree. It also helps if you continue to show kindness, respect, and love to your in-laws. It may really throw some witnesses for a loop since they do not expect it from 'worldly' people.
Oh and one more thing. My wife's KH sits next door to a baptist church. I commented multiple times that I can see the witnesses facing off with the baptist both saying simultaneously, "We have the Truth and Your following false doctrine."
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juci32
Thanks u guys are great!! For the record I AM NOT HAVING ANY CHILDREN!!! lol We have been good. have been talking lately about the things I don't agree with like..the blood issue, everyone but Witnesses dying , other ways to preach besides door to door and it went pretty well. We just agreed to disagree and moved on so I think we are good as far as that goes.
GARY! How are ya!! U wanna KIT? Maybe we can encourage one another . I would love to chat with anyone going through something similiar . [email protected] C YA!
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juci32
(((Snowbird))) Thanks sis!!:-)
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GLTirebiter
Hello Juci, welcome to the forum!
Your story gave me a dose of deja vu. A lapsed Witness, seems to be utterly normal and nice, finds a non-believer fiance, promises to not try to change him/her, gets married, and then the steady pull of the oraganization pulls them right back in. Other than the genders being switched and that we have kids, it's much like my story. You have a lot on your hands, and I'll just second the advice everybody else gave you. Don't procrastinate hoping things will improve on their own, lest you end up in a place where only lawyers are happy.
I hope you're familiar with Freeminds, they have a nice repository of articles about the WT society and how it affects those it touches. I suggest starting with the marriage section, then the women's issues articles. Be warned, some of this will be a bit depressing:it's real life, not a Pollyana story from the latest copy of Awake.
Good luck to you,
GLT