As a JW Did you Feel " Guilted " to go to Meetings /Service if Injured /Sick ?

flipper

Many people in the Jehovah's Witnesses , older ones, younger ones have been expected to pioneer, go in field service with physical disabilities and are even considered "martyrs" if they push themselves to their physical capacities beyond reasonableness . Thus many witnesses feel sick, exhausted, tired, and essentially fight depression due to high expectations to " burn out " for the WT society. Have any of you experienced this while in the witnesses ?

Myself in the early 1980's when I was a ministerial servant remember going to meetings with a cold ( what was I thinking ? ) . Also I one time cracked my head open fishing in a steep canyon when I fell . I had my head stitched, shaved where I bumped it and had to wear a bandage on my head because I had a instruction talk that night . ( Was I nuts or what ? ) Another time after cutting firewood I had an oak wood splinter sling into my eye , missed my retina barely , but had to wear an eye patch like some weird pirate or something when giving an hour talk one Sunday ! I mean what was I thinking that I couldn't get out of that assignment but felt pressured to perform my assignments ? Elders would make people feel guilty if we didn't give our " best " to the organization ! Thinking back, it was really stupid.

So did any of you experience feeling pressured to attend meetings or go in service when injured or ill ? Were you told to ignore your physical, emotional disabilities in order to " perform " your meetings or ministry or elder/MS assignments - to your detriment ? As always I look forward to your responses. Peace out to all, Mr. Flipper

Quandry

I went to the KHall once when I had a bad fever-probably the flu-because I HAD to give my talk. I pumped myself up with tylenol and left after the talk.

Also, I took my infant daughter to the Hall come hell or high water, whether I'd slept the night before when she was a tiny baby or not.

Snoozy

My three kids all had the mumps...one kid at a time and one mump at a time..lol

Yep. The oldest daughter got them first, she had one swollen mump..next week she got the other one..then the next week child number two got one..then one week later got the other one. Next child number three got ONE mump..one week later got the other one..It was good for about 3 months off of meetings..then of course the boy got measles..soon as that started getting better he got Mono..go figure. That was good for a month or two..lol

And yet you always had the "Concerned sister" that would give you a call and insinuate that the kids weren't really all that sick..(she was just jealous because she didn't have sick kids at the time.) Sure, I'll just bundle them up and bring them with swollen jaws, the people there should love that..and my son ran 105 fever with the measles..with Mono he lost 30 pounds, he was really sick for weeks. Then you finally go back and they think you have been on a vacation.....

I didn't have time to get sick...

My luck if I did get sick...it would be after the then Thursday night meeting and be sick until that Sat. night..just in time for Sunday's meeting.. I too was a dork..

creativhoney

I used to remember people who liked everyone to know they had a bad back, and would come to the meeting and lie on the floor at the back.

*attention seekers*

lancelink

Mr. pirate-flipper,

I really appreciate your thoughts and insightful comments !

Yes there were many times I put attending the meeting above everything else. The weirdest thing I did was when my oldest son was a baby.

He had a rattle that was attached to a large suction cup thing, (so it could be attached to a high chair and not fall off). And while playing with him

I stuck it to my forehead in order to get him to stop crying. It worked, but I had a #4 talk that evening and I had a ridiculous round- red welt right in the center of head ! (it looked REALLY bad)

I was going to cancel,(4:00 pm) but my "trained conscience" made me go through with the talk, by the time the meeting rolled around the mark was almost purple , but I gave the talk and stayed for the entire meeting. What an idiot I was.

Another time we had a new co coming, and my two young sons were sick with the stomach flu. it was the middle of january and we were in a really deep freeze.(-20 f) My wife was feeling guilty for not being more supportive during the week, (for christ sake , the kids were sick)!

Saturday evening the elders called on the phone, hoping to see us all there Sunday morning.

So we decided to take them out into the freezing weather while they were still sick, ice and blowing snow all over the roads, but hey we were supportive !

Sometimes I look back and wish that God had hit me with a lightning bolt, and make me aware of how I was living my life and affecting my childrens lives .

crapola

I went so many times when either I or one of the kids were sick simply because of the guilt I'd feel if I stayed home. I look back now and realise how stupid that was.

I just in the last few days got in contact with a young man with severe emotional problems that back years ago was even worse. And he told me how hard it had been for him to give talks and go out in service but he was made to feel so guilty if he did'nt do it. That is so wrong. He's out now though and happier thn he has ever been and so am I.

Finally-Free

If I was sick and contagious I would stay home. I've injured my ankles, knees, and back more times than I can remember and had a few surgeries as a result. In those cases I often went to meetings when I could, but not out of guilt or attention seeking. If I had waited for a pain free day to leave the house I'd have been stuck in here for over 25 years, and I have no intention of being housebound just because some people stupidly assume that I'm an "attention seeker".

W

troubled mind

When our children were small I went through an episode of major depression w/full blown panic attacks . I still made meetings but would sit there with tears streaming down my face because of the mental stress I was feeling . Service became sporadic and our book study conductor (the Book study was in our home) put pressure on my husband to get me out in FS . I told him I didn't feel like it ,but feeling guilty I went . My husband felt horrible when we got to the first door and I broke down sobbing .

The day after our five yr old got out of the hospital from an appendectomy we took him to an assembly

finallysomepride

Sorry guys I never felt guilty about staying away when sick injured or otherwise, in fact once when I had an ingrown toe nail i deliberatly stood on it hard to make it hurt really bad just to stay away from the sunday meeting.

When I was 24 (1983) and had been married for 4 months I was diagnosed with non hodgkins lymphoma, I was in the hospital at the time, from that point on until I finished radiotherapy about 2 months I didn't attend any meetings, didn't feel any guilt wat so ever.

When I did go back my first meeting was a circuit assembly, I was 4 stone lighter down from 12 to 8, & not very energitic. All my clothes were way to big & the only ones that did fit were for lazing around home so I wore those, god the looks I got, not bcoz I was sick but bcoz of my casual attire, only one sister that I knew came up to me & guinuinely spoke to me, others it was like "what's the freak doing here".

It was at this stage of my life I realised that I did not have any real friends amongst the JWs.

asilentone

One older sister said to me in front of others if you have a migrane headache, it is not a good excuse to miss the meetings.

As a JW Did you Feel " Guilted " to go to Meetings /Service if Injured /Sick ?

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