by flipper 45 Replies latest jw friends
flipper
26 years ago now, doctors gave me an all clear about 10 years ago & their comments were "your chance of it re-occuring are the same as any one else in the general population developing this cancer". so that made feel pretty good.
still suffer from some of the side effects caused by 6 months of chemotheropy mainly depression due to chemical inbalance re thyroid.
There is no guilt worse than that delivered by an elder husband who needs for us to be the model family
on the flip side theres too many times i went to the hall and had some deovout JW coughing and spluttering all over me, i think all in health i ever had came from that place! As a health care proffestional it used to really anoy me, the balent disregard for infection control!
It was comman place in my hall for people to come up to you, shake hands, kiss, hug and talk for 5 mins before saying " i've got this terrible cough/ sore throat, cold, bug" i felt like screaming at them " why are you talking to me then!!!! havn't you ever heard of droplet infection???!!"
Yeh Guilted by my bloody wife. She put on such a performance if I did not feel like going and wanted to stay home that I'd finish up going just to keep the peace.
I remember near the end of my 'active' days, I would miss the meeting at the drop of a hat. If I didnt go, then my hubby would stay at home too and vice versa. But then its difficult staying away from meetings when you've broken an eyelash, but they spout off experiences about brother terminally ill, who lives in a mud hut in Africa, who walked for 3days to get to an Assembly, in the searing heat, over mountains and rough terrain, through crocodile infested rivers. almost drowning in quick sand, losing a leg on the way while escaping a ravenous tiger, all while having his 15 children on his back with no food or water. Yes,,,,,they sure do know how to 'guilt' you.
Of course, I knew several elders that worked on the road who said they went to the meetings on their route...NOT...and I could prove it. Then there were the elders (and family) who went to DisneyWorld for a month and never attend a meeting, just having informal WT studies...supposedly. What was their excuse?
Yup, the guilt factor was strong with me. I recall being a 17 year old dealing with severe health issues, and pushing myself to get to meetings and service, only to have the elders come visit me for a shepherding call and throw my field service records across the table and browbeat me for not doing more. My mother and I were in tears when they left and my father (an MS at the time) was ready to throw punches at them. We stopped him, but in hindsight I wish we'd let him kick their asses. They so deserved it.
tall penguin
BONNIE_CLYDE- It is the epitome of evil for this family to have gone to the assembly the next day or so right after their son drowned on the way and died. Unbelievable ! And witnesses COMMENDING them for putting Jehovah first by attending ? Gosh- I'm glad I'm NOT them . And a brother was made to feel guilty for staying sick in bed for a month also ? I saw that a lot too.
MARY- I'm glad your particular elders did not guilt people for being sick and missing meetings. But it sounds like you had a jerk for a circuit overseer guilting that poor elder for missing the memorial because of an appendix operation. There were so many people made to feel guilty.
WTWIZARD- So you went to meetings with tooth abcesses ? Ouch ! I too went to meetings even though being dead dog tired from working nights at my janitorial business . Many times I would fall asleep at the meetings. Often.
YELLOW- Yes, that was a favorite tactic of the elders telling us that " sister invalid " or " sister disabled " was pioneering, still giving their all going to assemblies - so why couldn't WE ? I just got to the point of blowing off the elders and hanging up on them when they'd try to call me. They just annoyed me.
OTWO- So you had an eye injury as well, eh ? I too wore sunglasses to meetings to cover an eye injury. It's so crazy we all thought the congregation would just collapse if WE didn't show up ! Truth be said - probably no one noticed ! LOL! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
FINALLYSOMEPRIDE- I do hope you are doing O.K. at this time. I'm sorry you suffer with depression. Please hang in there. I know it's tough.
LADY LEE- So your JW elder husband guilted you into being the " model family " ? I hear you. I had a JW wife for 19 years who was pissed off that I was " wasting my talents " and NOT reaching out for an elder position so she could have status amongst the congregation. Oh well - I'm much happier now ! LOL!
HIGHDOSE- I saw that as well what you say. I would go to meetings hearing 10 to 15 people coughing up a storm sometimes in the winter months. It's like they felt they would just DIE if they didn't attend the meetings with a cold virus. But the fact is : it would make others catch the illness and then EVERYBODY would all be sick at the same time ! One big happy family ! Sick !
LUO BOU TO- I know how you feel. I too was guilted by my then JW ex-wife of 19 years to ALWAYS attend even if I felt bad. I felt like I was on a treadmill to oblivion. Depressing.
IKNOWALL558- I hear what you're saying. The WT society really did guilt people into browbeating themselves into attending meetings by outlandish stories of brothers and sisters risking death and all worldly comforts in order to attend assemblies or meetings. It's like saying we should feel guilty for eating healthy food because all the kids in Africa or India are starving. It's ridiculous.
BLONDIE- I think a lot of brothers that worked out of town probably told their wives and others they were attending meetings. But they were probably hitting nightclubs and dancing the night away ! LOL!
TALL PENGUIN- I'm so sorry you were treated that way Penguin. It's that thing that elders have about ultimate control of people's lives - guilting them into feeling that they don't measure up to THEIR standards ! It's disgusting. I wish your dad would have kicked their a$$e$ also ! Would have been a humbling experience for them. In the WT society it was always about statistics and figures. Field service time reported, Bible studies conducted- nothing about love and kindness shown
