how do I banish negative thinking? (page 2)

moshe

Sounds like he is weak, too. He might be hoping you get mad and break it off. They say there are two men in a single woman's life- the man she is with- and the man she should be with. I have a friend who can't seem to make a pro-active decision- he always waits for the sh#t to hit the fan and then he does something. He gets plenty of good advice from friends who see the tsunami approaching his hootch, but he just won't move until he sees the big wave almost on top of him.

Heaven

I agree with Voideater and Shamus. You need to consciously choose to think of positive things. The physiology of the brain is such that for every 1 negative thought you have, you need at least 12 positive thoughts to nullify the damaging effects from the 1 negative one.

There are many things you can do to start to think positively. List 12 or more things that give you joy, that lift your spirits. If you are a visual person, look at pictures, videos, movies that do this. Start to move away from the negativity of this relationship. Get busy. DO things that lift your spirits. Surround yourself with people who are positive and supportive.

acolytes

Hi Heaven

You said "the physiology of the brain is such that for every negative thought ,you nees at least 12 positive thoughts to nullify the damaging effects from 1 negative one."

It is worth remembering positive thinking can be very dangerouse.( I say this as a great beliver in positive thinking) But from exsperience positive thinking can be as damaging as negative thinking if it is not combined with realistic thinking .

So I would say "creativehoney" Apply positive realistic thinking and remember LIFE DOESNT NEED TO BE PERFECT TO BE WONDERFUL.

Acolytes.

quietlyleaving

Hi creativhoney - hugs to you

wow you have received some useful advice here.

My 2cents worth - imo experience and suffering go together. I find it quite rewarding to take a philosophical stance which I know you often do too. Imagine your sons being in a similar boat when they get older - think of what you would say to them. Also see your doctor - maybe a short course of mild antidepressants can break the cycle.

good luck

ql

carpediem

ah creativhoney. Sorry I didnt post when you were lying awake. Not that I have anything special to say but as I was up messing about it would have been nice to say something. I have been in and out of many relationships like that during my life. Mostly because I didnt love myself enough. Looking back, the relationships werent so much about love, but about neediness and wanting to be loved. I am now married to a good man who doesnt treat me bad, but who I am not in love with. Another rushed relationship because I was scared to be on my own. So I am probably not the best person to give advice.

I think you are quite young and if I remember your photo correctly you are gorgeous. If I were you I would have some counselling, find something in in my life that I really love doing, and start to learn to love me. Also, do something for yourself everyday that makes you feel good.

xxx

highdose

i would suggest paul mckennas cd's, theres one for postive thoughts, and also for sleep. I found them very helpful as they restructure the brains thought path ways to think in postive terms rather than negitive

creativhoney

HIghdose. yea I have McKenna. and some books

Voideater. I love that philosophy - accept that you will always love someone and move on.. all i get usually from people is why do you love him its not worth it.. and thats no good, it doesnt change anything.. if someones bad behaviour just automatically stopped you loving someone, there would be no painful breakups.

creativhoney

HIghdose. yea I have McKenna. and some books

Voideater. I love that philosophy - accept that you will always love someone and move on.. all i get usually from people is why do you love him its not worth it.. and thats no good, it doesnt change anything.. if someones bad behaviour just automatically stopped you loving someone, there would be no painful breakups.

and I want to say to you all, I think the support on here is awesome. x

darth frosty

This is from KRS O.N.E I found it very helpful.

http://rapidshare.com/files/265602964/KRS-One_Power_of_Future_Lessons.rar

http://images.emusic.com/music/images/album/292/115/667/11566709/600x600.jpg

Check out the POWER OF FUTURE super conscious studies for the everyday metaphysician.

The secrets revealed in these lessons are very effective. These are the lessons and excersises that KRS ONE developed living as a home-less man. Remember, you control your destiny and never forget you are HIPHOP!

The techniques discussed in these seven tracks involve meditation, reconstruction of identity, time travel, and the sharpening of your astral senses. It’s a great guide for people who are just now coming to the subject. A great introduction for people who haven’t considered mystical practices before.

Robdar

The best way to banish negative thinking is to find something you love to do and become the best you can be at doing it. What do you like doing? What are you good at?

I like singing and have been taking singing lessons. There are so many songs and such a variety of styles. Got the blues? Learn how to sing blues. Like rock and roll? Learn how to sing rock and practice your Mick Jagger moves in front of a mirror. Believe me, you will be laughing in no time.

I'm sorry you are feeling so blue. But c'mon, a man is no reason to be blue. Believe it or not, he is doing you a favor.

Get out there and have some fun, gorgeous; and remember, this too shall pass.

how do I banish negative thinking?

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