Friend of mine wants out - small problem

by torn in two son 17 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  yknot

  Hmmm I agree with Choosing of course but.......

  Being UBER has advantages too!

  Her parent's relationship is their own responsibility and nothing she does will 'tear them apart', if such thing happens it is the adult's fault and responsibility!

  But back to the UBER thing....

  Okay so her mum and pop are being Uber in expectation..... so why not allow that to be the gateway to her revealing some of the more gobsmaking beliefs of the WTS!

  ..... so let me see.... what is one of the top ticket desires of all JW parents for their budding publishers???? Think, think, think ... I know..GILEAD!

  Okay lets go with that one! Gilead according to posters on the board is mostly composed of the early Knorr's Administration ripping off Rutherford's claim of Russell passing the torch (Elijah-Elisha) into Rutherford unto Knorr. Allegedly much stuff can be gleaned from the CD and early Knorr publications (consider contacting AlltimeJeff or A@G for more deets).

  So between the two of you come up with a presentation of the pursuing Gilead to her parents...... download the older publications and have her do the ole' ' mum/dad I just read and did you know that....'

  Once a little time passes she should develop and interest in the 'Rutherford era' too and continue with the 'did ya know' spiel!

  At least this way she is appearing to be a good JW, mis-directing their theocratic attentions, and giving her a project while she works her way through high school and into college....... to get into college with parental approval all she needs to suggest that the WTS does indeed need college-educated volunteers so her intentions of attending are only to benefit the Org ultimately!

  Again once she is 'of age'......college, college, college...... or actually maybe technical school so that she can pay her way easier through college (hey a technical job is better than waiting tables or clerking groceries while working on her BS or Masters!)

  Think about it...... or come up with a concept that is better suited to her needs!
• 

  jamiebowers

  As your friend ages and matures, she'll come to realize that her life is her own and doesn't belong to her parents. She can't live to please them. Actually, it's really hard to live to please yourself, so there isn't much time to worry about pleasing others, especially if they have unrealistic expectations.
• 

  diamondiiz

  Not sure if anyone asked this but is your friend baptized? If she's not, she can continue the routine as she lives under her parents' roof without getting baptized and work towards going to school and getting the best education she can so that when she leaves home she will do well in life. She should never get baptized and the parents will never shun her but be just disappointed which I'm sure she can live with that. If she's baptized she should play the game as long as possible until she can get to out in the most favorable time for her, even though she may have to cope with wts life for the time being. At 14 it would be hard for her to leave and make it on her own - not that it's impossible but hard. As a child she has a better chance to get to her parents' heart by asking proper questions. She may even be able to get her parents do some real research and see that wts is a fraud.
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  darth frosty

  I really dont have any better advice to give than whats been offered. I would like to say you and your friend should be thankfull that you figured it out at such an early age. Patience is a virtue and you guys have a solid four years to plan your out. tread carefully and ready yourselves foryour future away from the JW's.
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  Bonnie_Clyde

  In some ways, I'm almost jealous. These kids figured out it is a sham at age 14--it will be tough, but they still have time to do something with their lives. I made the decision to become a witness at age 14, influenced by uncles and cousins who were in deep. It took awhile, but both of my parents became witnesses as well, my father an elder. 50 years later, I went to my last meeting and was trying to do a "slow fade" so as not to upset my father. He got upset anyway, and now my daughter and my cousins want nothing to do with me--although not DF'd.
• 

  nugget

  You have been given lots of great advice. The great thing is she has time to plan. I don't know how smart she is but in the same way JWs teach you to plan to pioneer when you are young she needs to plan her exit strategy. If she is smart enough to go to college she needs to make sure she is taking the right courses and looking for scholarships as well as getting involved in extra curricular activities that will support her application.

  In this day and age even vocational courses are highly oversubscribed so she needs to plan and do the extra curricular activities whatever she decides. This is how she can partly sell it to her parents. This will also reduce the amount of time she spends on theocratic activities.

  The other thing I would suggest is that she starts building up her alternative support network now cultivate friendships outside the org and make sure she knows how to contact her sister. The other essential is obviously don't get baptised.

  I wish her good luck, she sounds like a smart switched on kid.
• 

  OUTLAW

  Good Morning T.I.T.S..

  The initials in your name still crack me up..

  Your a funny kid..LOL!!

  You`ve been given some good advise..Talk to your dad too..He`s a good guy..

  ..................
• 

  torn in two son

  My father - a zealous JWN poster - told me that it's impolite to start a thread, and not answer the questions of the posters afterwards. So here goes.

  Thank God - she is not baptized, has no interest in being baptized, and never wants to be baptized - ever. (On a side note, today at our lovely convention, one of my other very close friends got baptized...the virus is spreading fast) Thankfully, she does keep in contact with her DF'd sister thanks to AIM, Yahoo, whatever she uses. Her parents don't like it, but seeing how it's family, their own daughter, they'd feel pretty bad cutting off ties to her seeing how the two sisters are pretty close.

  Little shout-out, "Bonnie_Clyde", your story sounds horrible. With a freshly baptized friend of mine, I know that in a few short years, I'm not going to be in contact with him - ever. I can only imagine what it must feel like to have your own family shun you. My immediate family is on board, and our only hope is for my (very liberal) aunt and uncle to wake up, everyone else is very into it.

  Of course, we both talk of life after High School, a scary, troubling thought. College is something we both look forward to, but it's also an experience we're nervous of encountering. Freshman year all over again. "Y-Knot", I am 110% sure that neither she, or I would like to go the UBER ZEALOUS route, but thank you for the idea. "Black Sheep", you've given real food for thought, and may have answered my question, so I thank you. And OUTLAW, so far as my name goes, I figured, some people may think to do it, some people may want to do it, so i did it anyways.

  T.I.T.S. :D