Please accept my apology for being an elder and participating in Judicial Committees

by TastingFreedom 46 Replies latest jw friends

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  blondie

  I hate to see a thread 676 views and I can't even see the first post.
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  cantleave

  Can't see it either ........ However, I concur with your sentiments and feel the same regret.
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  Quirky1

  no shit..me too.
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  Gayle

  My dad, left the organization and later called a person who he had sat on the JC which disfellowshipped her to apologize. She thanked him for the apology but thanked him also that she was disfellowshipped, told him that it was the best thing that happened to her up to that point.

  Many years later I talked with an ex-elder who has left the organization and years later spoke of his disgust/pain for sitting on the JC and what the JC had put young people through.
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  zoiks

  Good for you, Taste!

  It must be tough thinking back on those JCs and other "shepherding"-related activities. While your apology may not concern anyone here personally, it still carries a lot of value.
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  nelly136

  can see one blank post on first page none of the 19 replys, but 5 posts on the 2nd page.
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  carla

  I can see the post and am marking to print out later.
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  flipper

  TASTING FREEDOM- I was one who replied to you on the first page, however there appeared to be a glitch so many of us could not read all of he first page responses. I will reply again with my basic thoughts.

  It appears you have come to understand that you were under cult mind control just as much as any of the rest of us my friend when inside the Jehovah's Witness cult. I was one of many individuals who suffered at the hands of unjust elders - but it was not you. I don't hold anything personally against you , so you don't owe me any apology. You were mind controlled by the WT society to carry outtheir wishes and actions. You've come to realize that- so the best thing you can do now is to move on in your life by developing critical thinking ability and helping others in the here and now to see what a dangerous mind control cult we were all in. Use the zealousness you had as an elder - to help people gain freedom from mind control now. THAT in and of itself may enable you to lose the guilt you feel of having served on these unjust judicial committees . No need to burden yourself with needless and unuseful guilt now - move on in life in a proactive way helping others ! I wish you the best my friend. Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper ( By the way- welcome to the board ! )
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  Open mind

  I'll copy the original post here and see if it makes it visible.

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  Just like many ex-JWs have apologized for knocking on people's doors and disturbing them, I want to do something similar.
  
  I want to ask for forgiveness to all those people who were subjected to horrible treatment in a Judicial Committee.

  During my years as a mental slave and serving as an elder, I participated in Judicial Committees where poor people were exploited for personal perversion and mistreatment.

  Many fellow elders (repressed people) could not help but to be turned on by the details confessed by the alleged sinners. Therefore, they needed to ask more personal and intimate details that would make any person very uncomfortable. Even I felt uncomfortable in some cases.
  
  The Watchtower is to be blamed for their policies in the Flock book. They have enabled the situation by instructing body of elders to find out some more details about the extent of a sin, like how far did it go, whether parts were touched, etc. According to the WTS, this helped to determine if it was porneia, which turned out to be the case in almost 99% of the time.

  As elders, we were instructed to find out as much as possible, such as how many times it happened, to determine if this had become a pattern in life, whether the person was remorseful and repentant, etc. In such a position that I held, I know that I caused a lot of pain and suffering.

  For that reason, I want to apologize sincerely for condemning you if we as a body of elders determined that you were unrepentant or rebellious. I realize now that we were not really helping you to be spiritual or to repair the relationship with Jehovah, but rather, we were destroying your world. We were humiliating you and thus, taking away your dignity.

  We were taking away from you everything you considered valuable like your family and friends, your support system. I am truly sorry for me being part of this for 8 years.
  
  There were many times that I tried to help by being more reasonable and understanding during a Judicial Committee, sometimes it worked in favor of the alleged sinner to avoid getting DF'ed, other times, I couldn't convince the majority, and so I was forced to form consensus.
  
  There were times that I could not sleep before or after JCs. The emotional drain was unbearable, deep down I was afraid of such horrible outcome for the person subjected to this.
  There were times that we just rushed through the proceedings, making it part of the routine, without thorough meditation, prayer or preparation. Sometimes, we would make a ruling just to get it over, and to get out of there. I sincerely apologize for being part of this injustice.

  Judicial Committees were the most difficult part of the "privilege" of being an elder. I am so relieved not to be part of any of this anymore.

  Once again, I apologize for judging people and subjecting them to such horrible treatment. I was also a victim of mind control and could not see what I was doing. I was following instructions and guidelines that were provided by what I thought were God's organization on earth, the Watchtower Bible and Tract society of New York.

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  Scott77

  Just for some tips. I opened this discussioin thread first in Internet Explorer 8 (IE). It did not show up in full. Only a few threads did show up. Computer stated memory low or lost. I usually prefer IE for it allows me to copy other's reply statements then past them back for quotations during replies. When I switched to Mozila Fire Fox, all the threads showed up. Please, try to switch to Mozilla and see if all your discussion thread will come up.

  Good Luck

  Scott77