ahh yes.....ever the invisible wallflower. Formerly a social butterfly....although my parents probably only ever "allowed" that because I was a pioneer at the time.
As a single adult living on my own, I've attended two other congregations at different times and even attended my "home" congregation off an on during different moving/living situations.
I found this statement ENTIRELY accurate: "they ignored me once I was no longer one of the team".
For YEARSSS I have struggled HUGELY with the heavy feeling of not belonging or fitting in with these people, knowing I could never be like some of my peers who had already accomplished the "great privilege" of helping out in foreign countries, moving where the need was greater, joining a foreign language group, or attending international conventions, etc. I've always felt less of a christian than those around me and nobody did a thing to prove me wrong. In fact, their actions only encouraged it.
The last year that I was still a JW, I was living with my parents, going through difficult depressions/medication changes/etc. I didn't USUALLY go out of my way to associate at the meetings. I would ride with my parents (which meant usually being the first ones there....awkward) and I would just go and sit in my seat until the meeting started. I found it so stupid that hardly anybody would ever come up to talk to me. If I was a stranger in the congregation, that would be one thing. But I friggin GREW UP with these people! I'd gone from childhood, to teenager, to adult, pioneering for a bit within the congregation even. And yet hardly ANYONE would come say hi to me??? Granted, they always said from the platform that we ourselves should be proactive in associating with people, but I ALSO recall them telling people that if they saw someone just sitting there, they should go out of their way to talk to them.
Some friends. Some spiritual "family".
Even the congregations I was a part of in my independence.....if I wasn't an avid commenter and over-active in the ministry, I meant nothing to them. Which really toys with your emotions and feelings of acceptance when you're like me - someone who goes through phases of being uber-zealous and then inactive. One month I could get auxilliary hours and the next, 2 hours. But if I wasn't doing the auxilliary thing, they didn't give a crap.
grr...ok now I find myself rambling....sorry lol
It's just complete crap. Unless YOU do all the work, you are completely ignored and overlooked. By EVERYONE. Well...at least...that was my experience.
