Get your kids out!!! I've lost all mine...dont leave it too late like I did...
When I was first a mother I resolved that noone would separate me from my kids (my childhood traumas were mostly caused by the departing of my mother) and with this stalwart ideal I reared them. I had my first child at 18 and my last at 40 so it was a kind of a whole 30 odd year parenting job if you get me. The majority of my life. The advent of the 'outfit' in our lives changed so much which obviously is only so evident to me now in hindsight. My kids were very gradually guided away from real family life with the celebrations and traditions, and groomed instead to respect elders and COs and Bethelites more than their very inadequate parents in a difficult marriage. There came at time with the 4 older ones...19 -30 range..I had taken a stand about the 2 sons behaviour to me who were still at home..and they were angry..an elder they talked to made a plan. He called a meeting between himself another elder and the 4 after a meeting one night at the KH. I went in ..they all sat in a row opposite me and the elder invited them to air all their grievances about me. It was a lynch mob kangaroo court. I cant describe the horror of it all. Even silly little issues from way back which were long resolved were dragged up to me in confrontation. The lies and distortions were in abundance too. I had to walk out in the end because I couldnt take the pain. I remember driving to a friend's home and I was unable to walk after she opened the door..I had to crawl in on hands and knees I was so 'doubled up' in agony. None of us have ever been the same again. It destroyed something between us all that couldnt be repaired. Writing this down is making me shake at the memories.
I dont profess to have been the best mother in the world...god knows I've got plenty of faults..but you know what, I did my bloody best as far as I could. And even when I failed them it didnt mean I didnt love the bones of them, I did, unconditionally. I only had my own resources to give them, their dad was hopeless as a father, but I gave the best of me for many many years...
Dont let this or anything like it...happen to you and your wife.
Loz x