Without launching into my saga, of which many of you already know, I have a JW Baby Daddy who besides being a JW is an emotional midget w/women issues....I continue to come here for support and info concerning the future of my infant and the quirks of the JW Family & Belief system at large, and what I will be dealing with in the future, BF or no BF, so this inquiry has nothing to do with my relationship with this person or lack-there-of, I'm just seeking answers to what seems puzzling. My posts are lacking in any specific detail as to not alert any possible lurking done my boyfriend or his family members, call me paranoid but it sometimes the circumstances, should they be stumbled on, are far to unique for it to be anybody other then this person, or their family.
Anyhoo, my non-baptized JW BF is mad at his mother, along with many of his brothers and sisters (he has a HUGE family). Mama, it turns out was never baptized, even though she has been a JW for as long as my boyfriend has been alive (almost 40 yrs). I just found this out.
Her husband, is a baptized JW, and althoughhe is not the father of any of his bros & sisters, they treat him as if he was because they have never had anyone else. He is the faithful Robot. A softspoken, kind man who does whatever his wife tells him and follows her around like a puppy. She turns out, not to be the zealot my BF had her made out to be (he was quite proud of her alledged zealousness, BTW), and they siblings have just figured out that ol' Mama is a JW in mouth and appearances and not in action at all. Further investigation finds that she only goes to meetings when she gets up early enough, and only when she feels like it (Go Ma!). But, her social circle is almost entirely KH related, and she wraps herself in JW righteousness when it suits her.
Mama is not the best mother by any extent of the imagination, but word got out amongst her many offspring that that she was being outright ignored and treated like sh** at the KH. For example, she was sitting with a group of sisters, and another sister walks up, invites all the other sisters but Mama out for lunch, and throws her a dirty look, that sort of high school BS by women of advanced age, and it was happening more and more. The siblings run to Mama's rescue and confront parties involved. Turns out there is rumors in the hall that there is "demons in the house", and "sin in the house". The siblings investigate and find out there is indeed "sin in the house", and truth be told, its ugly and I do feel bad for her husband. It's behavior that can't be ignored, and there is no excuse for it, or Mama's behavior, but thats besides the point of my post.
What the siblings did I do not however, agree with. Because they cannot go to the elders about Mama, they could go on behalf of stepdad because he is baptized. They called him in and counseled him, which got nowhere, and only resulted in things getting worse in the Hall for Mama, and it has driven her totally away from the religion/cult. Since she isn't baptized, they can't DF her, but from what I can gather, people were told to stay away from her. I'm glad for the lady in the respect she is starting to see the light, but the whole situation is messy. It doesn't excuse what she is doing, but involving all these people didn't help the situation AT ALL.
When I was told all this, my reaction was, "WTF did you do that for? Your brothers couldn't handle this situation on their own? You had to air the dirty laundry out for all to see? You had to embarrass your stepdad further?" His brothers could handle this on there own, a little "Redneck Justice", and although Mama might be pissed for awhile, but things would go back to normal for her and husband. Basically an ass-beating needs to occur (not Mama) to somebody. Call me simplistic, but sh*t would stop if an individual got there nose broken (its almost happened, many times), and they didn't need to involve the cult.
So Mama's response to all this, is as I said, to walk away. YAY!!!!! But unfortunately, her kids are turning there back on her. I can't say I disagree with not having anything to do with her because of her current behavior, but they are more turning their backs on her it seems more for her dumping of the religion then anything else. She did something completely innocent recently, I'll say it's equal to drinking a couple glasses of wine (details, you see, what she did was innocent), and the BF lost it. He said it would lead to other "sinful" behavior she hasn't done in years. His 60+ Mom is rebelling, and he said the Sisters in the hall suspect "she has a demon". Again, her behavior toward her husband is not acceptable, but her "drinking a glass or 2 of wine" leading down the wide road to hell is ridiculous.
Then I look at the family. God God. What hypocrites. I was told they hold Mama to a higher standard because of her "beliefs". I pointed out all of my BFs behavior, and his siblings, and asked why thye didn't hold themselves to that high of a standard, and they have done a hellavu lot worse then she has ever done, including the deplorable way she's treating her husband. A few of them have been to jail, or are in jail, BTW, or deserve to be! It seems they felt betrayed but her hypocrisy (I can't say I can stand a hypocrite either), and their reaction to her apostasy shocked them. Mama is a JW in social circles only, and talked out of both sides of her mouth. Evidently, Mama only pretended to take the red pill, and has been clinging to the side of the rabbit hole for many a-year.
I asked BF, "Your studying, right, and "Goebbels" knows about me, and your less then stellar habits, but all thats acceptable?" I ramble off a list of his own deplorable behavior (BTW "Goebbels" is my pet name for the guy he studies with), and if he has, or will be counseled about any of it. What he told me was "When I am ready to be baptized, I'll be over ALL of that, and I'll be as a blank slate." So you can be an a**hole, and make mistakes, but nobody baptized can? And even you, an un-baptized sinful "study" can judge them ?????????????????
If I wasn't so confused, I'd find this all entertaining.
