Since I have been a lurker off and on for years, I thought it was high time I got off my duff and joined. I didn't look at member names when I sat up my account, so I didn't realize there was a DesertRat already, I am just a slight difference with a space in there. Thought I would point that out right away so there would hopefully be no confusion.
My name is Sue and I live in Nevada. I used to be on Randy's forum years ago, some here may know or remember me. I wasn't born in the truth, but my folks studied off and on while I was at home. I was a teenager during the time of the big push to get baptized, since 1975 was very near, and I was of an age where I "couldn't ride into the new system on anyone's coattails".
Like many others, I watched '75 come and go without any fanfare. Discouraged, and thinking it might not be the truth, I fell away for a couple of short years. Got married, had a baby... Then it was actually someone at his work 'witnessing' to my husband that got him interested, and he towed me along when he started studying and going to meetings. That got me back into it, and I ended up wasting several years of my life being the good little zealous pioneer sister. My husband never did get baptized! What a smart man he is!
There were a lot of reason's to my finally leaving in about '93 I think it was. Probably the hypocrisy within my own congregation was the foremost factor. Then my husband made it easy for me to fade out, by taking a transfer to the other side of the state (Oregon). Then we made another move shortly after, down to Nevada. It was also easy because by that time, I had no close family that were still in. A very quick fade you might say, one day I was there, and the next I wasn't! Wish it were that easy for every one!
I haven't gone back to any kind of organized religion. I am scared to death to step into a church, even though I have really had a desire to lately. Maybe I'm afraid I'd be held captive if I did, I don't know, not sure what my hangup is with that. I think my need for religion right now, may be, because our family has had a string of five deaths recently, and maybe I'm wondering if this life is all there really is...??? I know I will never return to the jw's!
~Sue
