How important is it to love someone in your life?

by Mindchild 13 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Thomas Poole

  Best to love Christ first, if you have found him. Then you find a like mind, a like heart in the Body Of Christ. Make marrying in Christ a priority over romantic or sexual love.

  Then learn about dependency behaviors, search for demonic infiltrations that might be causing family disfunctions. Learn about manic depressive types and passive-agressive behaviors, and so forth. Note if every day with this person will be a new battle with new rules.

  Look at the parents of the prospective love. Note the family realtionships. Their relationship will show what to expect with your love.

  Then you examine the living skills, social skills, parenting skills. Are they able to make a living for themselves. Can they sing, play music, enjoy applying a fertile mind. Can they discover life and laugh at themselves. Can they love and cry and allow themselves to be vunerable.

  Then after you are finished with your education with a living skill in hand, prepare to dedicate yourself to this person, and serve Christ until you reach the next life.

  Remember your spouse is someone with whom you will serve Christ, someone with whom you will raise normal rational Christian children, children who will know Christ's love because of the parent's example.
• 

  thewiz

  love is what you make it.

  However, love is crucial to a well developed human being.

  Studies have been performed that children who are deprived of love and physical contact grow up with severe mental and emotional disabilities. Some even die.

  I've been a JDub all my life and have known nothing else, and I do NOT EVER remember the WTB&TS saying that a person could not develop a relationship with someone of the opposite sex.

  However, they never said that a person could not go to college either, yet I still shake a shit stick at the WTB&TS. When it all boils down to the brass tacks, it was I, who decided not to go for my dream. I gave up too easily. I eventaully went to college, but not for the dream, I settled for something. A dream only comes once, if you give it up, you give it up forever.

  Today, because I do not handle stress and aging very well my health suffers, sometimes severly for it.

  Thomas, there is NO next life, this is it. It's like Woddy Allen said in Love and Death when the grim reaper had taken him away: "I got screwed." In the end we all get screwed.
• 

  Satanus

  Wiz

  Maybe we are afflicted w self denial. Maybe we need to 'cultivate' (to use a wt term) the the fruitage of selfishness just to be normal.

  SS
• 

  cat1759

  Don't mean to get into things here but the WTBTS did say that further education was prohibited pre 75. They didn't encourage young people to stay in school as the end was coming in 75. Give me a break, they have said so many things and then retracted. If you were a good witness you would follow all the rules laid out before you. If you went to college you were looked down upon as a worldly person.

  Thomas Poole, by the time I look through all the history mentioned in your post I would not even be interested at getting to know the person. Who friggin cares. I am so much different than my parents, I am so much differen than my family. I have made choices to bring my kids up against how my sister and brought her up. I am so glad as I have well balanced children. Oh yes, they have had their share of trouble as I have been there to pick up the pieces and pay the lawyer bills. They are now productive individuals in our community and even respected. Hence while my sisters elderettes have turned to drugs and fornication and there is no one to help them through all this. Now according to your statements, my sisters kids would have been better candidates for you. How flawed your thinking.

  Mindchild:
  One thing I have learned in this life, is the old saying, "Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." Yes, while that love is deep and hurts when circumstances don't allow you to be together, but the feeling it gives us is something that we will take for the rest of our lives. Knowing that just that one time we felt love and we were able to then learn what love was.
  I don't believe you have to sleep around to learn what this is. When you are not looking it just hits you, sometimes you don't even understand what you are feeling. It is just there, then you begin to learn what love is and that maybe you never felt this burning desire and caring of another human being before that time. I don't think you get it with sexual partners. I feel it has to come long before you both decide to have sex.
  At that point in your life you are willing to give up everything for that one special person because you can't live without him/her.
  If you go looking for love, you will never find it. It will find you. If you turn someone away because they don't match up to what you envision yourself with, maybe you have given up on the one person that is able to make you happier than you have ever experienced.
  When I fell in love it was with a man I abhorred. I didn't even think he was handsome. He had these droopy eyes, so dark and weird. I hated him. Wow, what happened after that was something I never expected, I fell in love with him. He new what I needed without me saying anything. He could read me like a book. I didn't know at the time he loved me. Not until the morning he came out and told me and asked me what I felt. I didn't know that what I was feeling was real love. Yes, I was a true blue witness in and out. How was I suppose to know love, it was something never experienced. Then it bit me in the ass.
  Sorry if this is to long. Just so many feelings that you have all brought up.
  cathy