MRS. JONES- Ooooh, la, la ! LOL ! I see !
PEACEDOG- I hear you. There are lots of very nice, decent women out there in the non-witness world
As a Man have your Attitudes Towards Women Changed since Exiting JW's ?
by flipper 31 Replies latest jw friends
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meangirl
I really needed to see a thread like this. I have been inactive for 2 years and still get enraged when I read the stupid comments by the society demeaning women yet to be honest in dealing with people in general it seems these stupid sexual stereotypes are so strong in our culture you almost can't get away from it. Also seeing the intelligent and respectful comments regarding women in this thread has shown me that maybe people don't want to continue on living that way and know that it is wrong. Sometimes I really wonder when I see some of the comments here about women and ask myself why those people left the society as they still feel the need to oppress women. Thanks for this Mr. Flipper!
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CuriousButterfly
As a child of an elder and now a wife of about 15 yrs I have to say both my husband and father treated me and my Mom with great respect. I speak my mind and I know the elder body probably cringes but I am a human being too. LOL I refuse to stay for an elder's meeting if it goes over 15-20 min. I have a life and a job so they are all aware to make sure we know ahead of time and take 2 vehicles or make it snappy.
I have seen some Men dump on their wives and if I am a good friend I have spoke my mind to their husbands.
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flipper
MEANGIRL- Good points you make. Is is sad that the society we live in certainly degrades women- as do patriarchal type cults or religions which de-value women also. The men you've seen commenting positively about women on this thread have worked to LOSE the JW view of putting women down. They've re-educated themselves and through life's experiences have learned to treat women as equals. The men you've seen who make denigrating comments - haven't lost the arrogant patriarchal attitudes which influenced them as witnesses. Obviously - THOSE men have more work to do in changing their attitudes. Glad you like the subject discussed ! Hope things are going well for you !
CURIOUSBUTTERFLY- I'm happy for you that your father and your husband have treated you with respect and dignity over the years. You are fortunate. It's good that you speak up when you see injustices occur and stand up to the elders for what is right. You have a good heart
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dinah
Flipper, I have made some close men friends here. I won't name names, but they have all become great friends and treat me like a human with a mind. I hate to say it but the WT thinking trains them to see women as a maid with a piece of ass included.
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flipper
DINAH- I'm so glad you've developed good men friends here. I too have developed good women friends also . The WT society tried telling us we couldn't have good friends of the opposite sex without the sexual tension involved. I have found that to be a lie. My wife and I have good friends of BOTH sexes here on the board and elsewhere. Sex never comes into it. WT society is full of pervs imputing wrong motives to everybody. Talk about friends - wife and I lost your phone number ! LOL ! If you get a chance PM it to us- O.K. ? Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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dinah
Okay, Flipper!!!!
Another thing, my father was never a Dub, so he didn't have those same attitudes. He would rather me have been atheletic than a good housekeeper------(no dice on either, Pops, sorry!!) I was probably raised differently than most here.
My Dad's friends were also important. I had GREAT male role models as a female child. It was NEVER expected of me to just get married and be a drone.
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flipper
DINAH- Sounds like you had a really cool dad. Good for you. I'm sure it spared you the grief that many girls had being raised by patriarchal JW dad's. And it's really good when a woman had really great male role models growing up. I'm sure it's helped yu be a very well balanced female in your attiudes in general about life ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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flipper
Wanted to bump this up for any who wanted to comment, thanks, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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XJW4EVR
My experience was different. My Elder dad was always supportive of my mom. He partook in the chores around the house, and was never violent towards my mother. In fact, I can only remember one time in which he raised his voice to her. Come to think of it, that was only the second time I ever saw him mad. Don't get me wrong I saw him angry on many occasions. However, there is a line that divides angry and mad, and that line starts with shouting.
Anyway, my dad always treated my mom with respect. On those occassions when there was going to be an Elders' meeting after a meeting, he would let my mom and grandmother know so that we could drive my grandmother's van to the Hall. During the winter this did not happen as both my mom and my grandmother did not like driving then at night. However, once I got my license, I was made the official driver on those nights. He never really made us stay late unless it was absolutely necessary. Though the Elder's meeting at the Circuit Assemblies sucked the worst because those went on and on, and my family went to those disasters in one car.
My own views towards women never really changed, as I believe that I saw modeled for me the correct way a husband should treat his wife. While there have been some modifications over the years, my general ideas have not changed.
All that being said, I realize that my experience is not the norm. For the most part, I have seen some of the most horrid treatment of women by JW men.