I have been there, too. The outcome depends on your wife, but I have a feeling she will throw her lot in with the old GB geezers in Bethel. She will be sorry down the road, but that won't be your problem. My kids took my side a few years later. Good luck- and I believe being honest is the best way to go.
Definitely getting DF'ed now
by notverylikely 150 Replies latest jw friends
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ziddina
..."if i really honestly tried to get back in and be a good JW, but if i didn't want to teach the kids that way i should leave. ..."
Ooooo - kaaay, now I'm REALLY worried...
Don't do anything in haste.... I sure hope that advice didn't come too late...
How old are your children??? Are they old enough to be reasoned with?? Can you get custody??
On that point, if I were in your shoes, I'd start collecting evidence about how the JW cult is negatively affecting your children; otherwise, the wife - who is already behaving in a self-righteous manner, making demands upon you instead of displaying "wifely submission" - will probably do her best to retain possession of the children... After all, she's been "mind-controlled" to believe that they HAVE to be raised in the WTBTS' teachings, or they'll be "killed" at "Armageddon"...
Totally incorrect, but a terribly effective motivator for your wifey to do whatever she can, to retain control of your children...
Like I said, I hope for you the best results possible - children who already see the inconsistencies in the WTBTS' teachings; a wife who will be willing to remain with you while you "sort out your spiritual conflicts" - (and hopefully show her some REAL "New Light"!!!); and lazy, neglectful elders who will ignore your situation for a long, looong time...
Zid
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shopaholic
It'll get better...at least now you can live, for real. Wishing you all the best...
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notverylikely
Kids are 7 and 10.
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yknot
Drag it out......to ur advantage!.....she is just wanting a reaon to have hope. WAtch the dvd together and suggest the idea that maybe you need to reaffirm you faith buy relooking at the wts. Ask he to read through from start to finish the Wts pubs as a couple study......focus on making her feel you need her help. She will wakeup on her own as she reads our history...... You have greater influence in the home then visitaion every other weekend
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believingxjw
Notverylikely,
I don't know you or your family but if you want to continue having a close relationship with your young children I think you should consider "repenting" and continue to attend meetings. Later when you feel it's right you can always fade. Don't put your children between you and your wife. Fade later and perhaps your relationship with them will be preserved. Don't let anger at the Watchtower rob you of your children!
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notverylikely
i admitted to cheating. I am not going to drag my kids into this between me and her. Over the past few weeks I was trying to get her to look at just the JW printed stuff to show inconsistencies and issues. She refused. Her brother died a few years ago and she is holding on to the resurrection hope with both hands.
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leavingwt
I'm sorry that all of this has happened. Please hang in there.
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notverylikely
With the kids, when the time comes to talk to them, I am just going to explain that i made some mistakes. honesty is my new best policy.
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notverylikely
I'm not excusing my behavior, but when your partner witholds affection for months at a time (like, 6, sometimes) because you aren't spiritual enough....well, if there's no food at home, you go out to eat.