Watching them FADE in an other way

Darth plaugeis

My father was a Cop for 30+yrs. He was a tuff and ruff Cop. His sence of Humor was AWSOME. 2 yrs ago we discovered he had Alzheimer's.

The last 6 months we have watched him Fade away from who he was. He is scared of everything and rambles about nothing. He spent some time getting evaluated recently and I was heading home and Mom walked me to the Elevator..... There I saw my Dad ex Cop tuff guy. One you wouldn't want to fuck around with walking hand in hand with a Male Nurse begging me to take him home. I assured him everything was gonna be fine and with a smile he walked back to his room hand in hand with a man.

My Father was there.........but he was gone. My Dad would NEVER TOUCH ANOTHER MAN.

He used to check in on the Elderly when he was on duty and now he is just like those he was concerned about.

It Breaks Your Heart.

mrsjones5

That's so sad Darth. Alzheimer's is a cruel disease. My grandmother had it and during moments of lucidity she would cry because of what was happening to her and there wasn't a damn thing that could be done about it.

MrFreeze

Alzheimer's is one of the worst diseases to have. The way it eats away at you until you aren't even the same person anymore. At least something like cancer doesn't take the person's personality and everything you know about them away. I'm sorry for the terrible time you are going for.

wasblind

Alzheimer's wreaks havoc on the victims of the disease, and on the hearts of the family

Stay strong Darth, try to stay strong.

Mad Sweeney

Sorry you're going through this, bro.

StAnn

Darth P., so sorry for you. My great-grandmother died of Alzheimer's when I was in my late teens. My grandmother died of Alzheimer's 3 1/2 years ago. Granny was 89 years old. My mother is in early stage Alzheimer's now. When last I saw her, she didn't know me and kept introducing herself to me.

It is a cruel thing to watch. However, at least they aren't lucid enough to know what they've lost. Does that make sense? How much worse it would be if they were truly aware of what was happening.

A little funny story~~when my grandmother was early into her Alzheimer's, I bought her a birthday gift. I gave it to her in a gift bag. She LOVED jewelry so I bought her jewelry. She opened it, admired it, and finally put it back in the bag. About every two hours, her eyes would land on the bag and she'd ask me what was in that bag. I'd give her the bag, she'd open it (again), admire it (again), and put it back in the bag (again). This happened on and off all day and she was always so happy when she opened it! She made me sing happy birthday to her every time she opened it, since it was from me and she didn't realize I'd been there all day long. It was kind of sweet that, in the middle of the darkness, she was still able to have one last very happy birthday.

serenitynow!

I'm sorry about your dad. I wish I could say that it gets easier, but it doesn't. I went through it with my grandma and it was hard to see her forgetting how to do basic things. If you can just try to make his remaining time happy. Bring his favorite food, take him on outings, etc. That's what I did for my grandma, and for the time that she was doing something- even just going to a sit down place for burgers and cokes she enjoyed it. They often go back to a childlike state so doing simple things with them can make them happy.

I know it's hard to see your dad holding hands with the male staff, but at least he is not hostile and refusing care. I was a nurse in nursing homes for years and it's even worse to see the ones who won't let anyone get near them to bathe and feed them. Also think of it this way, your father in his career helped many people, he saw people at their absolute worst; now it is his turn to be cared for and helped. I can also tell you firsthand that when it comes to taking care of those in the "helping" professions- police, EMS, nurses, doctors, we do try and take extra special care of them.

skeeter1

I am so sorry to hear of your father's troubles and your loss that you're losing him before he's actually no longer here. I've watched a few people go through this disease; and just try to hold on to the memory of who he once was.

Here's a funny story. A 82 year old female relative was getting her initial psychological examination because family members suspected she was slipping. A family member was present, but remained silent throughout the exam. The elderly lady was very convincing, talking about where she lived, her daily routines, friends, hobbies, etc. At the end, the psychologist has a meeting just with the concerned relative The psychologist declares that he sees no sign of the disease. The relative states, "Didn't you just hear that she plans to go home and cook dinner for her mother and grandmother? Her mother and grandmother have both been dead for years!" ..... short end of the story.... sounds like the psychologist needed an initial consultaiton.

Quandry

Darth,

Please hold the memories of your loved ones close and dear. Dad needs you now more than ever. I watched my granmother, and then my mother, lose touch with reality. Yes, it is hard.

Serenity, what you said was so sweet:

Also think of it this way, your father in his career helped many people, he saw people at their absolute worst; now it is his turn to be cared for and helped. I can also tell you firsthand that when it comes to taking care of those in the "helping" professions- police, EMS, nurses, doctors, we do try and take extra special care of them.

Darth plaugeis

thank you for all the up building support. I do see my Dad as what he would of been as a child. I worked with him for 25 yrs in the Town that he was a cop. I also worked for the same Town but as Road Maintenance so he was there to watch my back. I think we bonded more in those years than my childhood. He wasn't my Dad, but he became my Friend like lots of the other Cops. His Mom (my Grand Mom) had the curse also and she became totally ......how can I say this in a good way.... Brain Dead. He is (this shows that we are aging too) young 67. He looks like he is 50. I treat him the same as I always did .....like when we worked together when ever he starts rambling I say ..."Dad what the fuck are you talking about?" And he stops and Laughs...... I don't know.
I hope it skips a Generation!!!! LOL

Watching them FADE in an other way

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