I like being shunned - how about you?

by THE GLADIATOR 43 Replies latest jw friends

  • Desert Rat
    Desert Rat

    When I left, a quick fade out, I took my own family with me. The other few were already out, leaving only an Aunt and Uncle. I moved out of state, so never had to worry about any shunning. Just a few months ago at my Mothers funeral, I knew I would see my Uncle for the first time. When he came in, he came right to me. Gave me a hug, and asked what he could do to help. The week was filled with making arrangements, sharing meals, and memories. He never put me on the spot, or asked me anything about what I was doing as far as the JW's go...

    My Uncle never told me-- and I never asked, but I heard from many CO's through the years-- that my Uncle was 'of the annointed' and had an exceptional Bible knowledge. His 'knowledge' didn't keep him from being there for us all, when Mom died.

    Of course, the real test would be if I were to show up on his doorstep for a visit!

  • discoveringlife
    discoveringlife

    Very funny post Galdiator. I diassociated in February of this year and right away I felt a load off my shoulders. There a few really needy witnesses always on my back about needing this or that. I would be like, "hell , I've got 5 kids and shitload of work and NON ONE is helping me" . It did hurt a lot at first, but know when I think of the foolishness of it, it hurts a lot less.

  • yourmomma
    yourmomma

    im not DF'd, but i would mind if i was. all my family is out, and i have no friends that are jw's. so being DF would be great if I were in a store, so I would not have to be bothered by people coming up to me and saying "we miss you" or whatever bullshit. Although now if I see any JW, I pretend I dont see them, and since Im sporting facial hair they avoid me for the most part.

  • keyser soze
    keyser soze

    I'm not shunned, personally, though I think it would be easier sometimes. I avoid most of my JW family by choice, as it is, so it would really make very little difference. And by being shunned, I wouldn't have to make up bogus excuses to miss family gatherings.

  • THE GLADIATOR
    THE GLADIATOR

    There seems to be a consensus that shunning is painful at first but hurts less as time passes. It takes time and a positive attitude to see being shunned as a blessing. Since leaving the Tower, I have not had to attend a single funeral.

    My father died last year. My brother, who is a brainwashed elder, wrote to inform me that I would be allowed in the kingdom hall but not to the reception at his house. There was a PS that mentioned they had forgotten to tell me that my elder uncle, a prolific breeder who went forth and multiplied, had died 2 years earlier, or invite me to the funeral. I ignored the letter.

    From my mother, I received a torn off notebook page with 2 sentences stating that it was her duty to inform me that me that my father was dead; the first letter from her in 15 years. I ignored the letter. I always shred these nuisance letters from religionists, as trained to do by the Tower.

    Being let off from attending all these morbid and boring funerals, dressed up like a kipper, is an added bonus. I can honestly say that I have not shed a single tear over their failure to live forever. Instead I have experienced a warm glow, knowing that death has robbed them of the ability to continue shunning me, while I enjoy a comfortable life and good health. The devil looks after his own, which is more than their god does.

    Let the dead bury the dead!

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Its a horrible thing- I've learned to cope with it.

    Loz x

  • tec
    tec

    (((((((((Gladiator)))))))))))

    I think that's a pretty tough outer shell you're wearing, my friend.

    Shame on your family for how they treat you. 'Duty' to inform you of your father's death?

    I was with my grandfather when he went to visit his mother in a home, only to be informed that she had died a year past. No one told him - not because of shunning or anything, just out of greed. I was only about ten, but I remember the pain and shock on his face - as much at his family as at his mother's death.

    More shame on the WT for doing this to them and to you. I think you are an intelligent and sincere and respectful person from what I've seen of you here - and they are missing out.

    The devil is indeed looking after his own, and I'm not speaking of you.

    I'm glad you have your older brother.

    Tammy

  • undercover
    undercover

    Not being DFd I don't face shunning to the degree that many do, but it does happen occasionally...usually from a dub with their head pretty far up their ass.

    I find it amusing when a JW that I never really cared for or was never close to makes it a point to shun me...and I'm only inactive. It reinforces the notion that association in JWland is conditional on your activity level.

    But I have been shunned by people who I had been friends with previously. That stung a little, but it just reinforced how indoctrinated they are.

    I don't mind when it happens now. It's pretty clear that I'm not interested in coming back so if someone chooses to shun me, fine with me. Just saves me the trouble of having to pretend to enjoy seeing them again.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    Immediately after my baptism the love bombing stopped. Even when I pioneered I was virtually shunned except when they found something to nitpick about. Eventually I started to enjoy being ignored by them. In fact, I enjoyed it so much I eventually DA'd.

    My only regret is that I don't have any "family" or "friends" that are JWs. I'd really like to send them pretty little "Fuck You" cards every year in June to celebrate the anniversary of my freedom.

    W

  • THE GLADIATOR
    THE GLADIATOR
    I think that's a pretty tough outer shell you're wearing, my friend.

    Tammy - as perceptive as ever.

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