"The devil is indeed looking after his own"
Yes, Tammy is perceptive as ever
Gladiator, keep your head up
I like being shunned - how about you?
by THE GLADIATOR 43 Replies latest jw friends
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wasblind
And just imagine, they THINK that they are following the Christ,
maybe they will get hit by a new light and realize that they are not.
Ya think?
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cyberjesus
I dont like the shunning from rational people. The problem is that all my loved ones are JWs.
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tec
I think one of the most frustrating and saddening things about the WT is that they seem to hone in on a rule (one that Paul, and not Jesus, taught) that is as much in opposition to love and mercy as possible - and then they ignore the fact that love and mercy were always supposed to be the most important matters of the law.
In my opinion, your family has no love in themselves (nor recognition of what love is)... or perhaps it is buried deep, deep beneath fear and legalism. And while I'm extremely sad and angry on your behalf, I'm glad that you knew enough to get out - it says a lot about your strength and character that you would not live by their warped views.
I just wanted you to know that you've been foremost in my thoughts. (also my prayers - you might not believe, but they certainly can't hurt you)
Strength and peace to you,
Tammy
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sabastious
Jeezus Gladiator, those are some harsh circumstances with family members dying and those letters... kind of gave me the shudders reading it, but you seem so calm...
Do you go to therapy at all? I find it hard to believe the matter-of-fact tone in your post reflects your actual emotions on such matters.
-Sab
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jamiebowers
I did have 43 JW relatives but 4 of them died recently, which I found rather encouraging.
I hope you meant that to be funny, because it cracked me up!
My jw mom has shunned me for 20+ years. It hurt at first, but now it's a relief, because I don't have to deal with an annoying jw.
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Hadit
How awful! What love this organization teaches. I'm sorry for the sheer stupidity and hateful attitude. Letters informing you of family deaths? How hurtful, disrespectful and unloving.
I'm certainly glad that you seem to be doing well. Take good care of yourself - those are hard things to go through. I wish you all the best.
The only person I don't want to be shunned by is my son. That would be devastating. He is not baptized and I'll fight to keep it that way.
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nelly136
i tried it both ways, allowing them to throw crumbs crumbs as you put it was just a toxic contamination.
once i'd dfd them and made a clean break it was far easier to detach from that part of my life and move on. just wish i'd done it sooner...but no point crying over spilt hindsight lol
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THE GLADIATOR
Thank you all for your comments. Yes there was an intentional hint of satire.
Thank you for your prayers and good intent Tammy. In the UK it is now morning and I have just slid the lid off my box.
sabastious I find it hard to believe the matter-of-fact tone in your post reflects your actual emotions on such matters.
I left the Tower many years ago and difficult as it was at the time, life moves on. It has made me less trusting and rather reclusive and guarded but it's a big world and the freedom to choose who we want have as friends brings with it a certain freedom.
To survive as humans, we have to develop the ability to let go of the past, which includes people. Our life has to be what we do each day. I have seen so many people destroy themselves by harbouring regrets and longing for the past.
The past is gone. It exists only in our mind each time we choose to give energy to recreating our version what happened. All of us who were JWs had good times too. I treasure them and still laugh when I think about those times; young optimistic and waiting for a new world. Some of the JWs I knew were great people and it was a privilege to share that time with them.
When it comes to feeling, I actually feel sorry for the people I left behind. My relatives have made some very poor life choices due to their beliefs. I have empathy for them because they have been lied to and conned. They drew the short straw.
We all have to grow up and face reality. It was my choice to leave and I have no regrets. It was not possible for me to continue living a lie, however much I wanted to. I hope you all find your own way of coping with the pain and loss of losing something that you once valued.
They key is to stop placing value on the things you chose to let go of. You once valued them and they brought you a feeling of security and joy. Now they are out of date. Imagine you are updating your wardrobe. Replace them with up to date friends and a fresh new philosophy or faith and then value those new things. Value yourself and others who have chosen to share a part of their life with you!
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Hadit
Thanks for the heartfelt words Gladiator! It's inspiring to see that making a new life is possible despite the past. Valuing ourselves can be so difficult but certainly very important in moving on. Not giving energy to the past is a very good point to.
Have a wonderful day !