A JW MOTHER'S SO CALLED LOVE (page 2)

carvin

That is so sad, your poor sister, and yes the children. Contrary to popular beliefe, aur actions do affect others.

As to your mom lying, the elders don't care. Even if the congragation asks the elders about it all they have to say is there was not two witness to the rape so they could not act upon it so they are covered. And as long as people are gossiping, lying, and slandering, as long as it does not insult the org., they don't care. It keeps the R&F minds off the lies from the borg.

Hugs to you and your sister, please continue to be a safe place for her and the children when they need it.

elm

Hi mad,..... thank you for your kind words, it amazing that when my sister turned to the Jw's for help none was given, and so all these years she blames herself. My sister fell away from the truth through lack of help and understanding ect... and was dfd for not attending meetings, so you know the rest she was shuned by everyone..........but my mam will talk to her if my sister makes the effort to go and see her. My mam will never go and see my sister, its my sister that has to do the running.

MMXIV

Elm,

I've been shaking my head at this story and how your mother has abused her position. She seems to like male attention and was old enough to know better than cross the boundaries with her son-in-law. Maybe she justifies it as rape because she made a half-baked attempt at stopping the situation after leading him up the garden path. You're right though - there's no way she would have carried on for 6 weeks if it was rape.

The sad part (aside from all the hurt you've had and huge effect it will have had on your sister) is that by manipulating the story to your brother - it will sound to him like your sister was in the wrong for having married a dodgy brother and staying married to him.

I'm almost angry at how shameless she has acted - she's screwed up her own daughters marriage, robbed her daughter from ever being able to trust her mother and all of this at a time when she needed support just after having a new baby. Pretty sick.

Might be worth setting the record straight with your brother if you can. Perhaps asking him if he thinks what he's been told is true and if he suspects there is more to it.

MMXIV

zoiks

(((elm))) welcome

wasblind

I can believe an adult who says they were repeatedly molested as a child, because as a child, they are powerless without the aid of someone else to help them out of this situation.

But a grown ass woman? Laughin' and talkin' with the rapest for six weeks ? this is the longest rape in history !!!!! and for the mother to says it's better he slept with her than a complete stranger ? that most certainly was not rape

Your mom is a disgrace to all women who have been truly raped, i think of the women in countries like Malawi, and afganistan and here in the U.S. who have gone through that horrific experience. And to know that someone like you mom would make light of it is sickening.

elm

Hi wasblind,

It is sick that my mam would cry rape, I honestly think she in some really twisted way thought it would lesson her guilt for her part in the affair.

Because my sister wont go and see her, my mam has twisted the knife even further by cutting her out of the will.

The most sicking thing is, if anything goes wrong in mine or my sister's life she say's its because we are not witnesses anymore and that's what we get for being part of the world.

I have been dfd for 20 years, but I still always thought it was the truth and was making my way back about 3 months ago. My mam was giving me all the help she could. I learned about the "new light" on blood fractions and could no matter how much I tried work out how this was now acceptable.

Cut a long story short I found this site and I will never belong to the JW's organization again. So then I told my mam and guess what my mam will speak to me if I phone her, but she no longer contacts me anymore, my dad will he still comes round and talks to me. I have just found out that they are moving away so I will most likley not see them again.

What gets me is my mam 24 years ago showed repentance, and was forgiven by the elders and the congregation, but my sister's life was damaged, and because I no longer believe that the JW's are the truth I'm shunned and my children. But as long as my mam continues to go to meetings and out on the work she is in a good standing with Jehovah a true Christian !!

cyberjesus

I am interested in hearing your BIL side of the story, he just loves family :-) who know what else he has to say.

elm

Hi cyberjesus,

My ex BIL, has never been dfd but no longer considers himself a JW, he has always remained in a good relationship with my sister and is a good father to his children. He has never remarried, and still lives on his own to this day, he regrets very much his part in the affair.

As for the rape allegations I'm unaware that he knew anything about it, I do know that he knows nothing about that my mam has told my brother 2 weeks ago that it was rape.

Hadit

Elm - I'm so sorry for you and your sister and the rest of your family. Your mother is supposed to be someone who you can trust no matter what and love that you can count on. What she did to your sister is just awful. For her to go around thinking she is in a better standing with God than you guys is total hypocrisy!

I'm glad your sister has you. Keep loving each other.

Little Imp

Your story moved me so much. I think what Hadit says is lovely "I am glad your sister has you, keep loving each other".

My husband has a harrowing tale too which I hope he will tell one day on this site.

LI

A JW MOTHER'S SO CALLED LOVE

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