Been There, Done That, Please Shut Up!

metatron

I read a ton of posts on this site that basically follow the same form: somebody has an argument with a close relative about the "truth" and long, angry e-mails follow thereafter - or heated phone calls - or face to face conversations - and the kitchen sink gets thrown into the mix.

You name it: child molestation, 1914, false prophecy, everything and anything that comes to mind.

No, No, No! Please do not do this! I have been there. I have done that. Unless you are really committed to losing your Witless family or friends, don't hit them with both barrels while you are angry and upset about a lifetime of being duped by the 'truth'.

Here's a piece of ancient wisdom - and it applies regardless of whether you are a an agnostic or atheist:

"I have many things yet to say to you but you are not able to bear them at present" John 16:12. Yes, that principle of gradualism still works with people. Guys, this is how you 'came in the truth' - and it is also the only way that many will be able to leave it.

If you want to emote or rail against Watchtower evil, have at it here with us as a sympathetic ear. Otherwise, resist the urge to spill what Witnesses perceive as venom ( as people you might want a relationship with in the future).

There are a variety of more careful approaches to use. Subversion may work better than an "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" finger pointing at you by entrenched cultists ( like your mom, sister, etc.)

metatron

elderelite

When I saw the tittle of the post I didn't have much hope for it to be logical or rational.. however, now that i've read it, well done!

sage advise

Mad Sweeney

A frontal attack causes the cult personality to instantly suppress the genuine personality and put up the preprogrammed barriers to block unwanted information.

Even if you're right, you won't win an argument with a cult member by showing him/her how they're wrong.

Resistance is futile. Subversion is the key.

THE GLADIATOR

metatron This is excellent advise.

A few weeks back we had a thread claiming that anyone who knew JWs didn't have 'the truth' and stayed or kept quiet, was a coward and a liar. I disagreed and made my views clear, which were more in line with your tolerant approach.

DaCheech

believingxjw

zoiks

Metatron - well said and exactly right.

journey-on

Very sage advice, Metatron. It's so difficult to keep the lid on when you're angry to the bone about all the misleading and false doctrine you've been gulping down for years. It takes a great deal of self-control to dispense the "medicinal" remedy in small doses gradually and methodically, but you will save yourself a lot of heartache in the end if your advice is heeded.

OnTheWayOut

I like your thoughts on this. Yes, get all your upset at WTS out somewhere else like JWN, but don't clobber family with it.
I strongly suggest reading Steve Hassan's RELEASING THE BONDS to learn how to help people. Also, try HOW TO RESCUE YOUR LOVED ONE FROM THE WATCHTOWER by David Reed for a more "Christian" way to help them- was helpful for a non-Christian also.

metatron

I think a simple defensive stance might be best. For example, I upset a long time Witness quite profoundly by pointing out that the purpose of life is happiness. If you say it is anything else, you aren't choosing happiness!

Another one might play on 'waiting for Armageddon' weariness. I'm sorry but I just can't rely on the Watchtower for authority anymore. I think they are good people ( ha - ha) but they have been wrong every year for 130 years. That's just not right and I'm sorry about it but these broken promises are just too painful.

Add your own ideas. Count to ten and take a deep breath before talking to Witlesses.

metatron

Been There, Done That, Please Shut Up!

Share this