WHAT IF YOU HAD NEVER LEFT !!!

warmasasunned

i am sure that this question as been asked before. when i think of my life now,a lovely kind beautiful wife, two happy healthy kids, good job, nice home, real friends. yes since i left the jws almost twenty years ago i can honestly say i have lived my life.

when i eventually left the death by bordem cult ... i had nothing, a loveless marraige i only stayed in because of the jws, no friends, no home to call my own, in debt, i had a wife who was so depressed she shooped to make herself happy. i could go on.

what about you, is it better would you go back, i shudder when i think i could still be in that nut house, being ground into the dust waiting to start living my life in the new order (god dosent that phrase want to make you vomit) .

of course i have my problems just as many as when i lived in lala land, but it helps you to cope when your happy.

love to hear your comments

sabastious

I have a hard time picturing myself not leaving. I have such fundamental differences than the Witnesses on just about every subject.

I'd say if I stayed I would just be a fringe member and would live out my life feeling guilty for not doing enough.

-Sab

OUTLAW

I`d be with the Rest of the JW Cattle..

Waiting for the New Light..

Moo!..

.......................... ...OUTLAW

Magwitch

Great Question!

I would have somehow survived my loveless marriage, dull friends, guilt ridden conscience and mundane life. However, what would have been unbearable is to have seen my two beautiful daughters forced to live the same life I lived all over again. The thought makes me physically sick!! The mirror broke - they are both happy agnostic college students with a lovely life right now and a lovely life in front of them.

sabastious

they are both happy agnostic college students with a lovely life right now and a lovely life in front of them.

I have an 8 month old. Your statement gives me a window into the happiness I will have when he's out of house with his own healthy view on the world around us.

-Sab

jaguarbass

I couldnt have stayed and been a bad influence on my son.

He was 10 when I left. Since I left he has a 4 year business degree and 2 medical degrees.

It was too hard to find work as a witness, any job with any security or money was wrong.

Since I left, I still havent been able to find a good paying fullfilling job that treats their employees decent.

Maybe next life.

wasblind

what a great post,

it gives hope to those in need

OnTheWayOut

I would still be holding in so much turmoil and frustration- maybe I would have burst by now and wound up dead or in the asylum. Or maybe I would suppress it all so well that I would be going out in recruiting this weekend and giving the talk at some congregation.

NAH. I know that if I didn't leave when I did leave, the adjustments in "this generation" to "the anointed" and then to the "overlap of the anointed" would have put me out. I would have got up and walked out on the first one, definitely by the time of the second one.

neverendingjourney

In many ways I wish I could have remained in the blissfull ignorance of my early JW days, just prior to my baptism. It was probably the happiest I've ever been in my life. The "truth" was as real as the ground I was walking on. I hadn't been in it long enough to realize how the propaganda didn't match up with what really went on in the Kingdom Hall. Everyone saw me as a potential recruit and put on their best face when I was around. I'd also not been around long enough to learn of various wacky beliefs they generally try to keep under the rug. Most importantly, a flood of mental doubts had not developed in my mind that required extreme discipline to hold back. Sure it was happiness based on a mirage, but haven't we all had dreams we wish we would have never woken up from?

But freezing time is impossible. I eventually got baptized and realized my elder-mentor was a two-faced hyprocrite. I realized the "happy" pioneers were heavily medicated and viewed field service as a social process, an opportunity to get together and gossip about the "friends." Most of them were putting in "phantom hours." I had run-ins with householders who showed me that the name "Jehovah" did not appear in the original manuscripts in the New Testament. I grew tired of being unable to prove my beliefs to householders who actually knew a thing or two about the Bible.

Like OTWO, I would have been miserable. You can't unlearn what you already know. You can't unsee what you've witnessed with your own eyes. You can't reverse the course of logical thinking that led you to understand that there were gaping holes in the WT theology. All of the recent, aimless "adjustments" to doctrine would have made it even harder. A tide was building and it was only a matter of time before the dam burst.

Giordano

If I hadn't left I would have been dead. Serious open heart surgery in 1985, it was a successful surgery, needless to say I needed some serious blood, made a full recovery.

Funny thing is I left because of that doctrine. I knew the WTBTS had gotten it wrong (by then I knew that had gotten a lot of things wrong). Hell It was just a recipe, "Drain the blood, season to taste, roast over an open fire." Nothing to die over.

Thankfully my wife left with me over the same issue, after pioneering 'where the need was great' we wanted to start a family. I had to go to school to learn a trade and we moved to find work.

If we stayed in I would have died before I actually became very successful, I was a late learner. My retirement has been good. We have one son and 2 grandchildren. They all live free.

I was going to tell my story about how and why we were and then we weren't JWs and some adventures, some of which were pretty funny.

Also accidentally getting shot at which wasn't too funny. Maybe I'll get around to it one of these days.

WHAT IF YOU HAD NEVER LEFT !!!

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