Just feeling a little down in the dumps tonight...

by garyneal 31 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  garyneal

  Been putting up the Christmas tree to add a little beauty in the home. Plan to do that also at work (lights, maybe a little tree). Helps lighten the mood and get more in the Holiday spirit. Baby wakes up crying, so I stop and feed her.

  Please hang in there and try to keep your chin up. This cult does suck. I hope things improve for you.

  This too shall pass. You know, sometimes, I find myself being glad when the seasons are actually over. Times like these make me so wish I married someone who did not have such a warped view of the season.

  BAD RUTHERFORD, BAD BAD BAD....

  misery: It's unbelievable that to marry within the 'truth' would make someone miserable. An elder or an uber pioneer making it so hard on their so so spouse. So much for 'spiritual paradise.'

  You mentioned the future, after this article is discussed, depending on how lazy your wife's congregation is, you may or may not recieve some attempts by brothers and sisters showing you "personal interest."

  Ha ha ha, I'd be so waiting for that too. Now, mind you, I will behave and keep my 'apostate' thinking to myself but if one of them tries to 'witness' to me, I will hit him with both barrels.

  By the way man, I hope you feel better. I hope the best for you and your wife, and your marriage. I envy you regarding the very fact you at least have a wife. Hang in the breh.

  Yeah, I do and I am thankful for her. If only she will wake up from her brainwashing....

  Hang in there Gary. My husband won't even go to an "end of the year party" even though witnesses who own companies throw them for their employees.

  Talk about an UBER DUB. Were you a witness too or were you always the 'unbelieving spouse.'

  Maybe you could ask your wife if she would only go to the second party instead, if that's the one that will mean the most to you.

  A fair compromise but I've already committed to the first and they don't like it if you renege. Understandable since the company did pay about $100 per person.

  Here's a little sumpthin' to make you smile. You should show it to your wife:

  She's already seen this in the Proclaimers book. Her response: Good thing the witnesses kept progressing in the Truth TM . Or some nonsense like that.

  **at home with the squits** or **at home with a migraine** would actually work just as well, if not better.

  HA HA, I can try that or I can simply try the truth and just say...

  my wife is a JW, and left it at that.

  Indeed.
• 

  Snoozy

  I got JW hubby to go to one of the big christmas parties that my work threw at a big hotel..

  We got a room for the night and once we got in the ballroom he helped himself to a few drinks..lol

  A little while later I couldn't find him and he was behind the bar with our president of the company serving drinks!

  We had a ball that night. a few drinks and the "Real" him came out...

  Course after it all wore off he went back to being a JW but we still had good laughs over that one..

  Snoozy, who knows your pain all to well!
• 

  Nickolas

  Sounds great, Snoozy. There's hope yet.
• 

  meangirl

  Just wanted to say your reason for feeling down are not silly at all. Hang in there...
• 

  Podobear

  Hey Gary.. comerade.. I was told my mother is being sent home from hospital today.. they have diagnosed cancer that has spread to Liver, Kidneys and Lungs.

  Mum has opposed Dad for 50 years, he is a JW Elder.

  Christmas was always a compromise in our home.

  Happy Christmas everyone... mine is gonna be a hum dinger.

  I hate Christmas.

  Podo
• 

  mrsjones5

  Sorry to hear that Podo.
• 

  Podobear

  Thanks mrsjones... just a bit down ... gotta be strong for the family's sake. Blood is thicker than water. We kids had to learn a respect for both points of view at home.

  I much prefer Hogmaney.. a good excuse for a booze up without the pseudo Christian overtones. The Scottish people have it right!

  Thanks for the TLC shown by so many posters. I have a sense of family again.
• 

  Black Sheep

  Just make it clear that you are not going to miss out on having your life just because she thinks god is going to kill all the non-Dubs in 1975.
• 

  Heaven

  Hi Gary ... Christmas can be a rough time for a lot of people, especially those without anyone to celebrate with. If you really want to go to the party then go. Don't let her stop you. Also, you may want to show her the scripture at Colossians 2:16. Give her something to think about.
• 

  blondie

  Gary, here is some info for jw wives and holidays and non-jw husbands (who are still the head of the family). My father was not a jw but my mother went to his friends holiday parties and even cooked a holiday meal one year.

  *** w01 12/15 pp. 28-29 Questions From Readers ***

  How can a Christian wife balance loyalty to God with submission to her unbelieving husband if he shares in religious holiday activities?

  Her doing so will require wisdom and tact. But she is doing the right thing in striving to balance her two obligations. Jesus gave counsel about a parallel situation: "Pay back, therefore, Caesar’s things to Caesar, but God’s things to God." (Matthew 22:21) Granted, he was dealing with obligations to governments, to which Christians were later told to be in submission. (Romans 13:1) Yet, his counsel finds a parallel in a wife’s balancing her obligations to God with her Scriptural submission to her husband, even if he is an unbeliever.

  No one familiar with the Bible would deny that it stresses that a Christian’s first obligation is to Almighty God, to be loyal to him at all times. (Acts 5:29) Still, in many situations a true worshiper can accommodate the requests or demands of an unbeliever in authority while not sharing in a violation of God’s elevated laws.

  We find an instructive example in the three Hebrews, as related in Daniel chapter 3. Their governmental superior, Nebuchadnezzar, decreed that they and others present themselves on the plain of Dura. Realizing that false worship was scheduled, the three Hebrews would likely have preferred to avoid being there. Perhaps Daniel was able to excuse himself, but these three could not. So they complied to the extent of appearing, but they would not—and did not—share in any wrong act.—Daniel 3:1-18.

  Similarly, around holiday times an unbelieving husband might request or demand that his Christian wife do something she would like to avoid. Consider some examples: He tells her to cook a certain food on the day he and others will celebrate a holiday. Or he demands that the family (including his wife) visit his relatives on that day for a meal or simply as a social call. Or even prior to the holiday, he might say that while his wife is out shopping, she must make some purchases for him—foods unique to the holiday, items to use as presents, or wrapping paper and cards to use with his gifts.

  Again, the Christian wife ought to be determined not to share in false religious acts, but what about such requests? He is the family head, and God’s Word says: "You wives, be in subjection to your husbands, as it is becoming in the Lord." (Colossians 3:18) In these cases, can she show wifely subjection while being loyal to God? She must decide how to balance obedience to her husband with her overriding obedience to Jehovah.

  At other times, her husband may ask her to cook a certain food, whether because it is his favorite or because he is used to having that meal in a particular season. She will desire to show love for him and recognition of his headship. Could she do so even if he made the request on the occasion of a holiday? Some Christian wives might be able to do so with a good conscience, simply considering it as a normal task of preparing the daily meal. Certainly, no loyal Christian would attach any holiday significance to it, even if her husband did. Similarly, he might require her to be with him when he visits his relatives at various times each month or year. Could she do so even if it was the day of a holiday? Or would she normally be willing to purchase things at his request, without judging what he intends to do with the items she buys for him while doing her shopping?

  Of course, a Christian wife should think of others—the effect on them. (Philippians 2:4) She would like to avoid giving any impression that she is linked to the holiday, just as the three Hebrews may likely have preferred that others not see them traveling to the plain of Dura. So she might tactfully try to reason with her husband to see if, out of consideration for her feelings, he might do certain holiday-related things for himself to accommodate a wife who loves and respects him. He might see the wisdom of not putting both of them in a potentially embarrassing situation if she would have to refuse to engage in false religious acts. Yes, calm discussion beforehand might lead to a peaceful solution.—Proverbs 22:3.

  In the final analysis, the faithful Christian must weigh the facts and then decide what to do. Obedience to God must come first, as it did with the three Hebrews. (1 Corinthians 10:31) But with that in mind, the individual Christian has to decide what noncompromising things can be done at the request of one having authority in the family or in the community.