I'm still a bit torn on the issue of associating with my parents. They have made absolutely no effort to keep in touch and usually any contact results in a generic witness email reply.
I have been at the point that I really don't need or care for their influence in my life for a while but I keep flipping back and forth between cutting off all contact and being the bigger person and at least give them updates.
So, in light of their recent aniversary, I went to the store and tried to pick them out a card. I never really realized how difficult that is if you're looking for a card to actually mean what you say.
Unfortunately I didn't find a card that said "Sorry you two are trapped in a loveless marriage and I could really care less about your opinions" so I settled for the least bit sappy I could find.
I put the kid's school pictures in and while out running errands dropped it off. My dad answered the door and I said happy anniversary and gave him the card. He invited me to come in and I declined by saying I had a kid in the car. My father said that we could both come in which I declined. I pointed out that it has been four years and a sudden meeting would be confusing for the kid.
My father retorted that it's only been four years because of MY choice. I was a bit dumbfounded. I replied that we have called and invited them for dinner many times with no reply and he just repeated that it was my choice.
A bit annoyed I just pointed to the card, told him that there were pictures of the kids inside and that they are welcome to call us if they ever want to get together. I stressed that calling would he HIS choice. Wished them a happy anniversary and left.
What a pain. Sometimes being the 'bigger person' really sucks.