Just BTTT for Barbara and for all the newbies.
You just gotta read the story, Fade From the Truth, A Tale of Learning Then Unlearning the Beliefs of JWs
by AndersonsInfo 49 Replies latest jw friends
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petitebrunette
Thank you for this article. I started reading this a few months ago when it was sent to me. I read it off and on. The last year has been a difficult one, after my disfellowshipping last April. I've just been trying to heal and process what happened. Last night I received a phone call from my older sister telling me when the memorial was. It followed with a long conversation that left me feeling worse than not speaking to her at all. All the things I said, she followed up with the pat answers I would have given a few years ago. I will never change her thinking, and I don't appreciate being tagged as a worshipper of Satan now. My Father has been inactive for my entire life (45 yrs). He started going back to meetings a few years ago, but has expressed certain doubts to me. My sister told me that he said he doesn't want to be in "paradise" if I'm not there. I'm breaking her heart, and other guilt inducing comments. I know she means well, without a doubt. I'm just so frustrated. I really appreciated finishing this article. I know my story is like everyone elses, which I draw a lot of comfort in not being alone. I thanked her for calling, no one else had the thought to call, email me or anything. None of my family would even call me to say goodbye when they knew I'd be disfellowshipped.
My sister and I'm sure all my family and former friends have come up with their own reasons why I would allow myself to be disfellowshipped and not come back. It's probably a coping mechanism for them, but frustrating to me. Alan had to deal with the rumors going around about him, and we all do too I guess. It's easier to just not think about it, until it hits you full force in the face like last night. I wouldn't tell her, but I will not now nor ever go to another memorial for the rest of my life.
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OnTheWayOut
PetitieBrunette, I hadn't noticed you posting elsewhere so I will say HELLO on this thread along with my thoughts on how sorry I am you are going through this.
It is the saddest when family members use WTS rules and policies to shun or make others feel guilty.
Your last paragraph is probably right. They are coping with filling in their own reasons. Nobody here or anywhere else has solutions to those problems. Some deal with it better because their families don't decide to shun or guilt as much as others.
Please be sure to develop healthy relations outside of the JW's.
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Watchtower-Free
Just read it . Good book from another elder who woke up . Is on Amazon for $4
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NewYork44M
I read the book. Great, other than a few formatting issues that may be unique to the Kindle download.
When I read the book I wondered the following question:
Does the Watchtower make families dysfunctional, or are dysfunctional families for some reason drawn to the jehovah's witnesses? In any event the watchtower is full of dysfunctional families. I can attest to that.
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Watchtower-Free
As a 3rd gen JW . I would say the answer to your question is BOTH .
Thats why theres so many .
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NewYork44M
good answer WTFree. Like they say misery love company.
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SkyGreen
Great read! thanks for bumping this thread.
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OnTheWayOut
Anyone who read the Kindle version, the author needs reviews.
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arwen
Just got the book from amazon.. great afternoon read and so very real behind the scenes elder stories.. I hope his wife is out and he is living happily ever after...