As a witness, what view of the world did you have? Heres my story

by stillstuckcruz 27 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Teary Oberon
    Teary Oberon

    "I just turned 20 years old. Like many I was raised as a JW. My dad is a devout elder much loved in the KH. My mother if very involved in the FS. daily witnesing, every JW cliche....she's it. All my life I've had my doubts about being a witness. Is it really the Truth? Is the NWT the true bible? Do I believe in God? All very common questions among others. I was baptised in 07'. Not because I wanted to, but because it was expected of me. And if I didnt get baptised, as you all know, your looked upon as bad association, goaless, and "on the border", even worldy. My brother did it, so I did. I've been falling off in the past two years. I havent done much of anything. I avoid FS WHENEVER possible. When I do go out, I leave the magazine and say "have a nice day", hoping I won't get "brotherly" advice from whomever i'm working with at the time. I give comments at the meetings maybe once every two months. I associate with no one from the hall. Not that there's any "good" association anyway thankfully in our hall. I look forward to work three days a week to give myself something fun to do. (love my job at Disney). Currently i've been given several assignments at the KH. Mike carrying and stage. #1 &3 talks. woohoo . I avoid them if possible. Fake sick or something. My parents have noticed my stone "progress" and have discussed it on many occasions with me, attemting to subtly "encourage" me whenever they can. I ignore it. I love them but just don't want to disappoint them, which will happen inevitably when I leave and they'l likely never speak to me again. Great work Society. . Anyway, main question is...what sort of view of people and the world did you have as a witness? At work theres an elderly woman that I see every so often. She is beaming every single day and when I ask how she's doing, she says in the most sincere way that she is soo blessed and happy. When I see people like, I can't help but think what am I doing."

    Only 20 and grew up around the Witnesses? You probably hate hearing this, but those who grow up around the Witnesses typically do have a complete and utter lack of perspective, along with lack of appreciation for what they have. But that is common--teens and young kids from every walk of life, Witness or not, tend to not appreciate what they have until they've thrown it away and burned down the bridges leading back. Such is the folly of youth...

    Another ancient saying: you get what you put in--if you put in nothing, then you get nothing in return. You say that you avoid participating in meetings, you make no effort whatsoever to get to know anybody, you only work in FS barely enough to hate it and you aren't honest and open with your parents. That is not on the WT, that is on you. It is a Hell and isolation of your own making, and it will probably not go away simply by leaving the WT. You'll find a new place, it will be great for a few months to a year, and then the newness will fade and you'll fall into much the same pattern of boredom, distrust and isolation. You've got to change your attitude first and foremost if you want to be happy, not your religion. Learn to appreciate and make the most of what you have and who you have.

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    Crap, you probably don't want to hear my story...

    Basically I was beaten and bullied into the religion from the age of 5 (when my idiot father joined and my moron mother followed...)

    Baptised at 17 because the beatings cowed me and made me feel backed into a corner...

    Left at 30 after building an "escape route" - which is what I would recommend for YOU...

    Unfortunate that you are baptised, because that will involve shunning, later on.

    Here's one course that you might consider...

    Get a better job.

    If you can't do that or don't feel confident about that, approach your parents and ask for their assistance in going to a good 'trade' school - I would recommend computer science, auto mechanics or machining, but you'll need to look at your own talents and inclinations and decide which method of earning money will work the best for you. There's also accounting, customer service, uhm, can't think of too many more options there - I don't think you'd enjoy sales, with your Jehovah's Witness background, but that is another option. There is also the option of driving - long-distance truckers are pretty independent, and you can earn a LOT of money, but I'd start out driving for a reliable company if you choose truck driving - and look up the potential companies online before you "hire" on; search for "lawsuits" connected with them. If a company has one or more lawsuits against it, it may be a bad place to work.

    After you've gotten a better job, START SAVING YOUR MONEY.

    I know there'll be the inevitable "need" for a nice car (buy USED, and consult "Consumer Reports" and the "Lemon-aide" books at your local library - and buy the car WITH THE HIGHEST RATING FOR MECHANICAL RELIABILITY. It will save you OOODLES of money, down the road), the plasma TV, the new furniture, the obligatory cell phone (a GOOD idea, especially for job-hunting), stereo set, and so on, but if you can, make do with the absolute LEAST - in other words, thrift stores and second-hand will be your "friends"; at least, until you've saved enough money to:

    MOVE OUT AND GET YOUR OWN PLACE. Preferably AS FAR AWAY FROM YOUR PARENTS AS POSSIBLE.

    This will allow you to FADE with a much higher degree of success... Be sure to move into an area [Kingdom Hall territory...] where your parents have few, if any friends in the local congregation. If you can move into an area [Kingdom Hall territory] where your parents have an active enemy in the local congregation, so much the better - they're much less likely to contact THAT congregation to enquire about your "spiritual progress".

    Of course, you'll still have to deal with your parents' frequent calls, checking up on you... Think in terms of "Reverse Theocratic Warfare" - if THEY can lie to "worldly" people about the real behaviors and attitudes within the Watchtower Society, then YOU can LIE to THEM about matters and behaviors that will improve your ability to survive - thrive - in the REAL world. [Higher education, well-paying job, overtime when possible - a good source of extra income, so-called "worldly" friends who - if chosen carefully - will be much more reliable than the "fair-spirituality" Jehovah's Witnesses you may currently call your "friends" - who will drop you like a hot potato if/when you visibly drift away from the "organization"...]

    Don't waste your time trying to "get them out" - at least, not at first. Just be prepared for some rough times ahead, with regards to your current family ties. That brings me to the most important advice of all...

    Build new relationships. Make friends with "worldly" people - but be careful as to WHO you befriend. I will say this - your current behavior will tend to set the tone for your near-future friendships; if you're currently using a bit of marijuana or even prescription drugs, you may end up with 'druggie' friends, and that is a mistake that you MUST avoid, if you're going to have any success...

    Also, since you're coming out of a "high-control" group, you'll want to examine relationships carefully and make sure that the environment that feels "familiar" to you - one with such high-control tactics - doesn't feel so "comfortable" to you that it makes you vulnerable to falling under the influence of a person who does NOT have your best interests at heart.

    This will especially apply to a significant other, after you've gotten on your feet financially and have obtained independent living quarters...

    Hope this advice helps... Wish someone had told ME about building an "escape route" when I was 16 - 20 years old...

    Zid the She-Devil

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    Oh, and "Teary Oberon" above?

    He's probably an ACTIVE Witness - perhaps a know-it-all Ministerial Servant - who's coming on here as an "apologist". You'll notice that he's flagrantly breaking the rules of the very organization that he claims is, "if you want to be happy, not your religion. Learn to appreciate and make the most of what you have and who you have. ..."

    The Watchtower Corporation's warnings against visiting "apostate" websites have been loud and strident, lately. So, if he truly believes that the Watchtower Corporation is such a "wonderful" place, then why is he going against their teachings?

    For you, however, it is apparent that the Watchtower Corporation - Jehovah's Witnesses - are exerting an unnatural level of control over your life. In fact, they are endangering your future with their edicts against higher education, seeking better employment, saving and investing wisely, taking on overtime when possible, and so on.

    Oddly enough, if you look around on this website, you'll find that most of the people here are WELL out of their "youth". Many have 'served' the Watchtower Corporation for 20 - 30 - 40 years, before finding the strength to leave - or finally being awakened by an overwhelming amount of evidence that the Watchtower Corporation isn't as "loving" or "kind" as they claim to be...

    Don't let him "guilt" you or "belittle" you into remaining in what is actually a very destructive high-control group.

    Zid

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    Teary Oberon said:

    "You'll find a new place, it will be great for a few months to a year, and then the newness will fade and you'll fall into much the same pattern of boredom, distrust and isolation."

    Well, I and many others on this board have been out for many years now.. Is it better ? Hell Yes! Of course life is not perfect, for one thing I have chosen to maintain family above my own interests , but that is my choice.

    Get out, stay out, make a life - Good Luck

  • Teary Oberon
    Teary Oberon

    "Oh, and "Teary Oberon" above?

    He's probably an ACTIVE Witness - perhaps a know-it-all Ministerial Servant - who's coming on here as an "apologist". You'll notice that he's flagrantly breaking the rules of the very organization that he claims is, "if you want to be happy, not your religion. Learn to appreciate and make the most of what you have and who you have. ..."

    You assume an awful lot don't you? Teary started out on the outside as a non-denominalist/Baptist. Then he became a fervant Witness opposer (much like all of you are now) because he had a friend that was a Witness and was worried about him/her. Next, he woke up to the misinformation being put out about the Witnesses and started studying himself, eventually getting baptized. After a few years, Teary faded and became inactive/DF'd, for quite a long time. Now, Teary is back at the meetings and enjoying himself and the association quite a lot.

    As was said, a lot of these young kids who were raised their whole lives as Witnesses don't have much perspective, But Teary certainly does. He has seen the Witnesses from just about every side you can think of.

    "For you, however, it is apparent that the Watchtower Corporation - Jehovah's Witnesses - are exerting an unnatural level of control over your life. In fact, they are endangering your future with their edicts against higher education, seeking better employment, saving and investing wisely, taking on overtime when possible, and so on."

    Just lies and distortion there. Teary controls his own life and his own decisions, including whether or not to associate with the Witnesses. Higher education? They already give that through the Bible. But if you are talking about job training then they don't have anything wrong with that. Most of the young Witnesses Teary knew went to a Vocational School to learn skills and trades (such as cosmetology, design drafting, construction management, ect.). Teary himself has taken classes at a Tech College designed for working adults (flexible schedules and nice prices).

    Saving and investing wisely? The Society has never said anything against that. In face, the Bible itself encourages wise saving with Jesus' parable of the traveling man who commanded his servants to invest his money for him while away.

    Seeking promotions and overtime? Even for a non-Witness, it is wise to keep a cautious and balanced approach with those things. Teary has seen many men who have foolishly ended up putting their job and their money in front of everything else, including their own families in addition to their service to God. Very sad indeed. As the Bible says, be content with a roof over your head and food to eat, and seek the Kingdom of God first and foremost.

    "Oddly enough, if you look around on this website, you'll find that most of the people here are WELL out of their "youth". Many have 'served' the Watchtower Corporation for 20 - 30 - 40 years, before finding the strength to leave - or finally being awakened by an overwhelming amount of evidence that the Watchtower Corporation isn't as "loving" or "kind" as they claim to be..."

    You forgot: "for 20-30-40 years, before simply being tricked into severing their trust in their brothers because of anti-cult propaganda. But eventually, even some of those ones wake back up again when they realize that the "evidence" wasn't quite what it seemed, and that the anti-cult movement wasn't nearly as loving and kind as it purported to be."

    Whether you like it or not, it does indeed work both ways (and only a person with perspective can understand that). You claim that the Watchtower is bad, and that they control their members through propaganda and false facts and social pressures and psychological tricks; but in reality, the anti-cult movement does every single one of those things themselves. It is often a case of the pot calling the kettle black, or jumping from the frying pan into the oven. The difference is though, that the Witness-to-antiWitness type (apostate in sociological terms) often get trapped in cycles of extreme anger and bitterness, while the antiWitness-to-Witness type often relieve themselves of the hatred and find more peace.

    That is just how the world works :/

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    First of all - speaking in 'third person'??

    REALLY?

    Secondly, it's "fervent", not "fervant".

    Thirdly, my comments about getting a decent college education were directed at the originator of this thread, StillStuckCruz - who, after 7 months or so, probably isn't coming back.

    Odd that you chose to "resurrect" this thread. Does that mean that this young man's struggle speaks to some inner conflicts that you have, that you have yet to acknowledge openly to yourself?

    Being a "house divided" within your own mind, must be very uncomfortable...

    But the level of cognitive dissonance that you have displayed in your posts indicate that the Watchtower Corporation may be the most fitting organization for you.

    Teary - or is that "Terry"???

  • Teary Oberon
    Teary Oberon

    @ziddina Haha wow. You attack Teary for resurrecting threads simply because he likes to type, and yet here you are reviving it once again with one of the most pointless, off topic and derogatory posts yet. How many random personal attacks were in it again? Teary lost count :/

  • Yolena Bristow
    Yolena Bristow

    Ultimately, Oberon? is at least partially correct.

    Poke holes as much as you wish, but ULTIMATELY being Happy is more about you, than it is about whatever else

    Someone I know is consistantly miserable *no he ain't a Witness, though he was raised by Witnesses* and it's consistantly someone else's fault, his ex-wife, his daughter, his mother, his father, his brothers, his boss, his old job, his ... his ... his ...

    A friend of his recently pointed out that maybe he should look into why this patern keeps repeating 'It's not a cycle, it's just high's and low's',then more complaining about how this must be SOMEONE else's fault because of how awesome he is

    I went on a vacation this year, didn't Really enjoy it til the last day .. Did the scenery change?? Nope, I changed

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