funny times growing up a witness

by strymeckirules 26 Replies latest jw experiences

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  strymeckirules

  i was raised from the age two as a witness by my new recruit parents in 1981. i was born in 79.

  i didn't like being jw, and that didn't mean i was a saint.

  and my parents were fanatical and still are.

  i have an an older sister and a younger brother and we are all 2 years apart.

  my brother and i were a riot. mischeivious, rambuctious, hyperactive and not afraid of nothing.

  we had games over the years.

  like singing in british accents during the songs(and during bible reading at family study) and screwing with the word just loud enough for each other to hear.

  we used to have armrest battles when we sat beside eachother. pushing elbows until the other slipped and got in trouble. even better if he fell asleep resting his head on his hand.

  or knocking the bible or watchtower or km off his lap during the sessions when it was quite.

  throwing a bible or song book under his butt right after the prayer before you sit down.

  hiding the book he needs next in my case.

  tripping in the aisle as we passed eachother to go to the bathroom.

  kicking or stomping the foot when they are giving an answer to mess them up

  when he was on mike's and i'd answer i'd grab the mike and have a little tug o war.

  seeing if you can get the last clap in the whole hall. tonnes of fun if it's a couple seconds after the majority dies down.

  if either of us had to give a talk the other would be trying to make faces to mess him up.

  writing captions like comics on the pictures in the watchtower study. so funny.

  daring each other to give basic one word "jesus" or "jehovah" comments at the meeting when we were in our teens

  pretend to try to comment all night but get missed cause you hesistate a moment too long to raise your hand. makes you look zealous.

  daring eachother to answer the wrong paragraph.

  i'm sure others have ways that they passed the time while they were too young to do anything about it.

  let's here some funny storys of youthful kingdomhall mischief.
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  tec

  That was awesome.

  For some reason I thought trying to get the last clap was the funniest :)

  Tammy
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  breathing

  ha ha, they are great,

  we used to try and get a stupid word in on the doors, your partner picked the word and you then had to slip it into the conversation, ive had to walk off from a door before cos ive been giggling so much!

  we used to do that putting your hand up at the last minute thing too! so youd look good but deffo get missed!
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  finallyfree!

  i remember i would do the same with my older bro. one time there was this particularly booming older brother giving the talk and we were horsing around, he boomed his loud voice over to us and said "isnt that right young brothers " we were scared shitless and sat like little mice till the talk was over. he reminded me of rutherford.
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  Crank!!!

  strymeckirules, me and my friends used to do all that stuff too!

  one of my favorite moves was when going to a door. start of the convo with the homeowner saying this, Hi my name is XXXX and this is my friend XXXX and he has something he wants to talk to you about. then just look at your friend, and he has the biggest OMG, what the heck am i gonna say look on his face.......priceless!
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  strymeckirules

  just remembered this one,

  singing the wrong verse in the song

  my dad used to do it accidently and we thought it was funny so we copied and played dumb. really messes up the people in front of you.

  a friend of mine would often take a songbook or bible from the person sitting in front of him during the prayer. just for jokes and give it back once they start panicing.

  i always looked up to the older youths, and they taught me some bad lymirics.

  so one sunday i go up to an elder i liked, as he was entering the doors and repeated what i was taught:

  if i was a dog and you were a flower i'd lift up my leg and give you a shower. i was 8 maybe. he gave me heck.

  or fake talks in the second school after the meeting was over.

  my mom banned the word "radical" when i was young, thanks to bart simpson, until a prominent elder was encouraging us young ones and he said "radical"

  right in front of my mom. that was the end of that rule.

  or in service, used to pretend to ring the bell. put your finger right up to it but don't push. easy morning, unless the householder sees you. whoops.

  we had a gang of teens we called "hoochie crew". bad news even though we were "witnesses". we had ties made that said our name and had the logo we came up with. we all wore them to the meeting the same night( or it might have been a convention) we got in trouble. no gangs allowed appearently.

  how many people here used to eat all the vanilla or chocolate puddings at the assembly so nobody else got any?

  or the frozen orange juice? that was great.

  still trying to remember more.....

  keep the funny coming.

  more experiances.

  (one bad story, i used to make cigerrettes out of mandarin orange peels and used service r.v. slips to roll it up with. it was horrible, but we thought we were cool. parents found them once and so we lied and said they were air fresheners. got away with it.)
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  brotherdan

  one of my favorite moves was when going to a door. start of the convo with the homeowner saying this, Hi my name is XXXX and this is my friend XXXX and he has something he wants to talk to you about. then just look at your friend, and he has the biggest OMG, what the heck am i gonna say look on his face.......priceless!

  I loved doing that.

  Sometimes we'd give each other fake names at the door and talk in aussie or english accents. The problem came when the person was interested and you had to try and keep up the lie in subsequent return visits.

  Once I was doing my presentation and when I got through the householder said, "I couldn't care less about what you're saying to me, but you might want to take care of that if you want to be taken seriously." He pointed at my crotch and my zipper was down and my tucked in shirt was sticking out about 8 inches. So embarassing.

  I had a pioneer partner that loved to fart right before the person opened the door and I gave my presentation. He did it once, and the guy opened the door, smelled the rankness, shouted "OH my GOD!" and slammed the door.

  Good times.
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  mamalove

  Oh my that was funny! Do we know each other? I too ADORE British accents! Being an American and all, I have somewhat fancied mastering the art of the regional dialect.
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  brotherdan

  I wish I knew you mamalove!

  My british accent comes across VERY cockney! So it was pretty obviously false.

  But I did have a pretty killer aussie accent. My go to character was " 'Ello mate! My name is Hezekiah and this is my partner Dill, and I have a beut of a message to give you this morning."
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  strymeckirules

  my father introduced me to monty python at about 13 years old and i mimicked every word. drove everyone crazy.

  but i won't get started on that...that's a whole thread on it's own!(life of brian and holy grail)