NC, he was ignoring my calls before the incident.
Friends dad committed suicide...
by MrFreeze 16 Replies latest jw experiences
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NewChapter
NC, he was ignoring my calls before the incident.
I understand, and it seems likely that he is ignoring your calls for the same reason. I'm just saying, we don't know that for sure. As I said, SOMETIMES death softens their stance, and there is a chance he is just overwhelmed. Probably not. You are doing the right thing--demonstrating love, whether you choose to go or not. They have this crazy evil idea that those that leave are wicked---but then how do they explain the compassion? No matter what, you have made a good faith move, and you can feel very good about that! The funeral service will likely be pretty public with a large mix of people. The father wasn't a JW, so you may get to talk to his co-workers and old friends. That may be comforting.
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Lunatic Faith
After the death of a relative things can be pretty crazy. When my dad died, and it was natural, I didn't return phone calls or want to talk to anyone. He may be existing in a sort of haze right now. I would go to the funeral and leave a card with your sincere regrets and sympathy. He can then take it or leave it when he is in a better place to cope.
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Broken Promises
I agree that you can't really judge why he's not answering your calls now. When you're dealing with a death, there's heaps of phone calls to make, people to talk to, arrangements to make, etc. He may have been avoiding you before, but now he may have no choice due to funeral arrangements etc.
Not to mention the poor guy is probably still reeling from his father committing suicide.
I'd say go to the funeral, if you can get a chance to speak to your friend do, or even just shake his hand. Later, he will remember whatever gesture you make.
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Iansays
Death questions our relationship with faith & friends, especially when it is so close.
Death has no boundaries, and leaves life to be questioned.
Let him know you are there with a blink of an eye, faith has no boundaries.
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MrFreeze
So I ended up going. I didn't know what to expect. I thought at the very least I could be there for the whole family not just him. I was warmly received, at least on the outside. I expected to see a lot of JW's there and I sure did. Talk about awkward. The looks they gave me...
I'm glad I went though. I at least was able to show my true quality.
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ziddina
So sorry to hear about this, Mr. Freeze...
At least they behaved decently towards you - and who knows? Maybe your act of caring and compassion will start the wheels turning in their heads...