The secret things men hate about being men (page 4)

Violia

yes MLE, women get yeast infections which are ( i think) equal to jock itch.

tec

THE VISUAL, MISERY!!!! THE VISUAL!!!!!

LOL

Tammy

MrFreeze

I'm going to make my reply to every one of these things:

These are hastily thought up facts and then some stereo-typical reasons, in response to Sam's Why men seldom get depressed thread. Feel free to add ones that have been missed.

Men:

Have to shave everyday or they look like Miami Vice wannabe's.

I do hate shaving

Have to register for the draft.

Never been drafted so no issue as of yet

Have to keep up that macho image for their buds.

Meh, I'd say I don't keep up the macho image all the time.

Have to pretend to love beer.

I love beer. There is no pretending necessary. It's a developed taste but I do love beer. Sort of like a lot of people with coffee.

To them, size is an important issue. Their brains get twisted in knots wondering if it matters to women.

I'm not gonna lie, I've wondered before about this. I don't really care anymore. I'm not small but I'm not ginormous either so take it as you will.

Need little blue pills. 40% of men need them after 40 and over 70% need them from 70 on and for some the blamed pills dont' work for them at all.

Blue pills cost at least ten dollars a piece.

Not old enough.

Men: don't get the credit they deserve for being class A nags. Poor fellas. Think governing body and elders, the champions of the art of nagging.

I try not to nag people about things. I hate to bother people.

Men: they get stuck with wives who just never, ever can cook, clean, or bail them out of trouble like their mommies.

Not married so can't comment.

Men: neck ties.

Never had a problem wearing a neck tie. Many people hate them but some times I feel kind of classy wearing one.

They are too proud to ask for directions so they spend 2 years, 45 days, 7.5 hours, 20 seconds driving around lost during their life times.

I don't have a problem asking for directions.

They are not allowed to cry, dammit. Not even when they slam their fingers in the car door. The only time it is okay for men to cry is when their hound dogs die.

I didn't cry when my Father died. Does that make me a bad person? I think that JW's aren't taught to grieve properly. I will admit I did cry when a good friend of mine died. However, this was after I left the organization.

They cannot have tea cup toy poodles with pink toenails, pink ear bows and pierced ears riding around in their pockets. They especially cannot name them Fifi or Chiffon.

For me it's not an emasculating thing. Those types of dogs just don't appeal to me. I wouldn't want one. My favorite dog is a sheltie.

Have to button the top button on dress shirts.

See my answer for the tie.

Have to pretend they don't love quiche.

I do actually hate quiche.

Have to pretend they come from Mars.

I try not to pretend anymore.

Have to pretend they don't watch Hallmark Channel and Oprah.

I've watched the Hallmark channel once maybe because there was a legitamite good movie on. I can't remember what the movie was though. I'm a movie buff. I've never watched Oprah and I have watched Lifetime but only to watch Unsolved Mysteries.

Have to pretend they hate Nanci Pelosi and that they love Sarah Palin.

Don't like either.

Can get woody at the most inconvenient times.

This is true.

Can I add one more? Getting your thing caught in the zipper. Ouch.

compound complex

Thanks, FHN.

No comments due to far too many mixed emotions; nevertheless, !

CoCo

Satanus

Not bad, flyin. It says something about your level of experience;) , or about how much you think about things. Only quite a few of those apply to me. The other guys have covered them pretty well.

S

dgp

Flying, as to me, you're mistaken in every point.

Nickolas

Men:

Have to shave everyday or they look like Miami Vice wannabe's. Bullseye.

Have to register for the draft. Not if they're peace loving Canadians.

Have to keep up that macho image for their buds. Are we talking Budweiser, here?

Have to pretend to love beer. But, but, I do love beer.

To them, size is an important issue. Their brains get twisted in knots wondering if it matters to women. We must be talking about beer guts, right?

Need little blue pills. 40% of men need them after 40 and over 70% need them from 70 on and for some the blamed pills dont' work for them at all. Then, I guess that 100% will need them after 100. Damn. Not looking forward to that.

Blue pills cost at least ten dollars a piece. Unless you buy the Indian knock-offs, then they're a buck and a half.

Men: don't get the credit they deserve for being class A nags. Poor fellas. Think governing body and elders, the champions of the art of nagging. Um, ok.

Men: they get stuck with wives who just never, ever can cook, clean, or bail them out of trouble like their mommies. Mine is a great cook and housekeeper, and never has to bail me out. Now mommy, she was a great nag.

Men: neck ties. Ugh. Two points for you.

They are too proud to ask for directions so they spend 2 years, 45 days, 7.5 hours, 20 seconds driving around lost during their life times. What, exactly, is your point? Stopping to ask directions of strangers has a statistically superior possibility of being carjacked than not stopping. Besides, that's what GPS is for, so long as you can figure out how to change the voice from female to male.

They are not allowed to cry, dammit. Not even when they slam their fingers in the car door. The only time it is okay for men to cry is when their hound dogs die. Or when they spill their beer.

They cannot have tea cup toy poodles with pink toenails, pink ear bows and pierced ears riding around in their pockets. They especially cannot name them Fifi or Chiffon. You were talking about what men hate about being men, weren't you?

Have to button the top button on dress shirts. Only when they're wearing a tie ... 2 1/2 points for you.

Have to pretend they don't love quiche. I eat quiche and I am proud of it. Just don't tell anybody, k?

Have to pretend they come from Mars. Only when processing the looks of females who have that particular expression on their faces when we say something incomprehensible.

Have to pretend they don't watch Hallmark Channel and Oprah. I'd rather go to the dentist. You lose half a point.

Have to pretend they hate Nanci Pelosi and that they love Sarah Palin. You lose another point. You're down to one.

Can get woody at the most inconvenient times. Ok, you win.

VampireDCLXV

Another one:

They have to trim nose and ear hair when they get old.

(Unless they actually like to have it growing into their moustaches or further impairing their hearing.)

V665 V665

FlyingHighNow

Thanks, guys you are great. I don't think any or all of these apply to any or every man. Some do for some. Some don't for some. I love the blow by blow of each one.

Sea Breeze diluted for water for jock itch and Gold Bond powder.

I highly doubt that men over 40 are using little blue pills in droves.

Read it once more, 40 percent need them, but I'm ith you, I doubt that they would all be using them. I say to men, "Take good care of yourselves so you can keep you and your partner happy."

Not bad, flyin. It says something about your level of experience;) , or about how much you think about things. Only quite a few of those apply to me. The other guys have covered them pretty well.

It says something to experience on some things. It says I am a sponge and absorb information, jokes and remarks from both men and women and somehow was able to remember them and type them very quickly to make a thread. They are not meant to be taken as gospel set in stone unshakable facts.

The secret things men hate about being men