Longtime lurker - first post (page 4)

Curtains

Hi applehippie

welcome. I'm so glad you and your husband got outside help and have sorted yourselves out. This is great news. I also like to think of myself as being earthy and free spirited - very liberating. I admire your strength and resilience.

nugget

Welcome to the board, transition is a difficult process but you will get a lot of support here and understanding. Many of us have been through the process and felt very similar things.

TotallyADD

Welcome applehippie, Just wokeup glad you and your husband was able to work things out. I was a husband who gave my wife hell also. Professional help saved our marriage and help us both to wake up and find freedom. As to what to believe? My wife has found her way, as far as me I am still looking. Good luck to you in your search. Love that name. Totally ADD

Vidiot

applehippie - "...eventually I decided that I needed more help and ended up going to the "worldly authorities" which didn't go over well but got the results we needed."

Hiya, hippie chick!

Yeah, it's a bit of a mindf**k when you realize that following the WTS's "Five Rule" principle doesn't always help meet one's needs. It's an even bigger mindf**k when you realize how much it chaps the WT leadership's ass when "Satan's World" is able to give justice, comfort, support, and hope to an individual after the WT is unable or (for ideological reasons) unwilling to.

Vidiot

beksbeks - "I never married a JW man..."

Are you married? I only ask because (like that sexy poopsiecakes) I've seen your picture.

applehippie

Lunitic Faith- My mom is still alive. Through her down to my girls we were fourth generation JW. I'd like to tell her story soon. It's a whopper.

My dad died in 2003, in March. I miss him every day, desparately. He taught me so much about living. Reading as I said, food, wine, music, carpentry, stonework, almost anything you can do with your hands. We used to go for long drives with no plan and have a glorious day of total spontaneous escape. Old book shops, gift shops, restaurants. This was after my parents got divorced and I was married. I have held onto the hope of the resurrection to see him again.

My parents got married in 1960 in NY, near the city. He was a very young congregation overseer, only 26. I don't remember if it was John or Russel Kurzon that married them. One of them. My mom did work at Bethel but I don't think she was ever officially a member of the Bethel family.

Cthulhu

Very good to have you here on the board. Your experience of not knowing what to think sounds all too familiar. I suggest studying the primary sources (or as close to them as you can come by) and decide then what sounds good. It's all a part of your journey.

Lunatic Faith

I'm 4th generation through my mom too. She died when I was still a teenager and I have always imagined welcoming her back in the resurrection. It was a few weeks after I decided the JW's didn't have the truth anymore that the realization came over me--I may not ever see my mom again. It felt like I had been punched in the gut. I actually considered going back just so I could hold on to that hope; but then I realized my belief wouldn't make it real.

I am surprised how quickly I absorbed the disappointment and now just leave it all up to chance. I hope I see her again. I hope she's in a better place. When I was a child, she actually told another sister that she never thought I would stick with the JW's. So she was right about--uncannily right about me.

When you say you have held onto the hope of the resurrection, does that mean you are still choosing to believe in it? It would be nice if we could still live on earth and welcome back loved ones...

Morbidzbaby

Welcome to the forums, Apple! I'm sure you'll enjoy coming out of Lurkdom to play with us! I lurked for a long time as well, posted for a bit, lurked for a while more... It really is a great place to vent, to share, and to grow. I've done all three quite a lot since my awakening.

My former best friend is a JW and went through the domestic violence issue with the very same results. Eventually, she just did it HER way and the "secular authorities" ordered him into counseling and now they are happy to the best of my knowledge.

My abuse was verbal, emotional, and mental. He never got physical (because I would have killed him and he knew it), but the rest of the scars are still there and rear their ugly heads sometimes in my present relationship. So although I wasn't hit, I do know the pain of abuse and not having anyone to turn to. I'm here if you ever want to talk.

It's clear you have a lot of questions and issues...I like the way a previous poster put it... "Lost in the spiritual wilderness". Don't worry, though...there's a trail of breadcrumbs that will lead you to where you need to be. You just need to follow them at your own pace.

Good luck, and again, welcome!!

Giordano

Welcome Applehippie. My wife and I walked out together in time for the first Woodstock! We left because of the blood issue and because the concept that billions of innocent people were going to die at armageddon was a self serving delusional belief. Because of those two issues I consider JW's a death cult. Odd how Jesus never mentioned either doctrine.

Our path led us to being non believers. We are self sufficent within our own hearts and minds fully reconciled to the relative short life term we will live only hoping that we will leave this world in slightly better shape in some small way. My story can be found on the search engine if you need an amusing read.

Longtime lurker - first post

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