The blessings of being disfellowshipped

by JRK 27 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  JRK

  Don't get me wrong, it does suck. But after being on ex-JW boards for years, and being DF'ed for almost 10; I do see some hidden blessings.

  First, you do NOT have to struggle with fading successfully. You are just out; the cord has been cut. No suffering about losing friends, they are long gone!

  You have the opportunity to move forward in life immediately. You have no fear of the elders anymore, as they have absolutely no power over you. What can they do, "Double Disfellowship" you?

  I see people struggling to mix bullshit meetings into their lives that are diametricly opposed to what they now believe. I would rather have glass shards shoved up my rectum than go to another meeting.

  Family wise, I really do miss my one sister that hasn't spoken to me in years. Then again, I am blessed thatI don't have to have anything to do with my other sister and her husband. I would be shunning them if it wasn't the other way around.

  Just a few random thoughts . . .

  JK
• 

  doofdaddy

  For me, the blessing of being "disfellowshipped" is I don't have to speak to those antisocial freaks anymore. I want nothing to do with them and am actually embarrassed to say I was one.
• 

  wobble

  A good summation JRK, and helpful to people just pulling away from the cult, to be DF'd has more advantages than disadvantages.

  It is not the big scary thing that we think it is when we are in the Cult. I am not DF'd, I managed a fade thus far, but I have to bite my tongue whe I talk with JW's, not a comfortable thing for a motor-mouth like me to do.

  About the only advantage I have is being able to talk to some who are doubting, and direct them here and to JW facts etc. If I was DA'd or DF'd they would not talk.

  But I am getting more pro-active so may get the chop, seen as a "spiritual danger" to their oh so fragile faith, soon anyway.

  Good post, who Effin cares about a de-effin ?
• 

  the-illuminator81

  It's also easier when you see a JW in public.. you don't have to prepare an excuse as to why you are inactive, they just run away from you so they don't catch the apostasy virus. I'm inactive for as long as they don't DF me, but I don't have any real objections to getting DF'd. Secretly I hope they DF me for something stupid, like getting caught eating a blood sausage or something like that.
• 

  wobble

  I wanna be done for gluttony !
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  MrMonroe

  they just run away from you so they don't catch the apostasy virus.

  Beautiful, Illuminator. Love it!
• 

  Murray Smith

  Bit like you wobble . . . getting more and more 'sinful' as time goes by . . . been secretly hoping for my hour in the "naughty boys chair" just for a laugh . . . and a battle of wits??? . . . but nobody gives a shit.

  Had a "witness' given to me today . . . right in the driveway where I'm currently staying . . . yeehah I thought!

  Talked for over half an hour and not a bible, magazine, book, or even a bible subject was even hinted at the entire time! . . . what the hell was that!! . . . nice chat though!
• 

  LongHairGal

  JRK:

  I am glad you are doing well. And you are right. What else can the religion do to you? Nothing. I think nothing makes them more angry than people who are beyond their reach.

  There is another thread about disfellowshipped people who are trying to get reinstated and it just breaks my heart to read about them being 'rejected' by the religion and what they are being put through.

  The religion wants to see disfellowshipped people crawl on broken glass first. Yeah. It would be cold day in hell before I would do that.
• 

  BluesBrother

  It is good when people can move on and have no fear or regrets. I have met some sad ones that still feared a death at Armageddon .

  Truth is though that one cannot generalise. I am thinking of those posters who have lost wives and the opportunity to live with their kids because of the WT's shameful policy.

  But if it is good for you..Congrats !
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  Yes, there are some curses to being a fader that you DF'ed ones don't have.

  A really good fade means not having to go to meetings, but it's still a juggling act with birthdays, holidays, voting, ex-JW gatherings.

  Hey, just yesterday my wife tells me that one of the elders (she gave his name- not the P.O. nor anyone who has had any contact with me over the last few years) asked her if it was alright to call on me. I asked her how long ago he asked that. She said it's been a couple weeks but she forgot to mention it. I said, "It would serve no purpose."

  So I have to occasionally deal with this kind of thing. Every couple of years, somebody gets a hair up their ass to help or show off to the C.O. or something. The C.O. I really had problems with is transferred by now and it might occur to the next C.O. that they have to do "something" about old OTWO. I bet this "request" was the result of just cleaning up paperwork for the C.O. and that'll be the end of it, but maybe one day they will have to go further.

  Then, I might find out what it's like on your side of the fence.