by pirata 21 Replies latest social humour
Feeling a bit silly tonight, so I thought I'd try my hand at some limericks. Feel free to add some more:
Two Witnesses just newly wed
Tried to get friskie in bed
But their research asserted
That oral was perverted
And quite soon their sex life was dead
Blood policy gives me a headache
Components that I have to forsake
But when they are minor
Then nothing is finer
Than the countless liters of blood they require to make
1914 jesus sat on the throne
next to the hotline phone
no one picks up to listen
the GB are too busy pissin'
So J just has a big moan.
there once was a brother from bethal
whose spiritual zeal was a marvel
but one day it seems
someone smothered his dreams
reporting he'd been to a brothal
a sister that lived in nantucket
would carry her mags in a bucket
at the market one night
she met mr. right
her response to the elders was *#@*#
@nancydrew = a sister that lived in nantucket
LOL. How did I know what this rhymed with?
There was a young witness called Nate
Who learned how to masticate(sounds like)
The demons possesed him
With independant thinking
And now he's just an apostate
................or...................
There was a young witness called Hunt
Who learned how to (as an Elder) be at the congregational front
The demons possessed him
With independent thinking
Now he’s really a twit (sorry can't think of a rhyme)
............or.........
The Governing Body hate Jesus
And to normal Christians it grieves us
They live in delusion
In quiet seclusion
Refusing to pay 'Caesars to Caesar'!
...............or...................
Obey the GB or you'll die
The Bible just isn't even their guide
Their failed prophecies
Put no one at ease
They just a filthy cult you'll decide!
There once was two brothers who heard
That the Watchtower wasn't the Word
to the old outhouse they took them
where the old rotten floor forsook them
And now they're together interred
The CO did sneeringly glower
as he answered during the 'tower
he got in a flap
they didn't overlap
those generations, to give him the power
at 10:30 sharp was their pattern
for coffee and donuts they'd pile in
there was much distress
they made such a mess
that the owner locked up all the restrooms
the neighborhood watch spread the message
that witnesses were on a rampage
so they locked all their doors
to avoid all the bores
but the tracks filled the streets just like garbage
There was a young brother from Boston
who bought himself an Austin
He had room for his ass
and a gallon of gas
but his mags fell out and he lost 'em.
There was a young sister from Wheeling
who got quite an unusual feeling
when she laid on her back
and tickled her crack
and peed all over the ceiling
There once was a lad named Taze
Who led his followers through a Maze
He made millions in his Scam
By publishing written Spam
And was succeded by Rutherford who was simply Amazed
