by pirata 21 Replies latest social humour
There once was a cult called JW's
Who preached world destruction and other views
The dates they'd proclaim
proved false all the same
and thier children still suffer abuse!
For persecution they wait all thier life
while dominating over thier wife
the persecution it seems
was of thier wives dreams
The Truth is the source of thier strife.
There once was a young man named Ben
who treasured his highlighter pen
the Watchtower he'd mark
while porn he would park
on the PC he kept in his den.
Here's a couple . . .
There was a young brother named Gordon
Who loved all the WT had taught 'im
When his girlfriend came by
He got kinda shy
So under his 'Penthouse' he stored 'em
Give me your lifetime to borrow . . .
And I promise you no more sorrow . . .
Just listen to me . . .
And my prophecy . . .
The fulfilment? . . . well, that comes tomorrow
There once was a drunkard at Bethel
Who reeked as if tanked up on ethyl
Fancied himself “Judge”
And Scripture he’d fudge
No truer than Hansel and Grethel
He thought, what’s the harm in a few lies?
Peddle my books! Were his outcries
Exhorted J-dubs, now peddle my pubs!
Advertise, advertise, advertise!
His mansion he dubbed Beth Sarim
Debauched, he kept his own harem
Four princes, two Caddy’s, too set was this fatty
So chill with a tall glass of aurum
There was a young man named Chuck
Who profitted from the good book.
He died in a toga
His cult banned yoga
The whole thing was totally f*cked
There was an elder called Guido (I'll stop here, you know what I'm going to rhyme it with so there's no point)
I don't
There was an elder called Guido
Who looked quite dashing in 'speedo's'
The reason no one would brooch
As they wanted no reproach
because he was an unrepentant.........scum of the earth
A virgin I've been all my life
Not allowed a chance at a wife
Now I'm seventy-five
and my thing ain't alive
might as well cut it off with a knife
A speaker Ciro Aulicino
he thought he was so in the know,
but Bethel did call him
and gave him a warnin'
so out to the field he did go.
The limericks so far have me LOLing and almost peeing my pants (though not on the ceiling like that sister from Wheeling). Keep 'em coming!
