by Quendi 32 Replies latest jw experiences
The process is this:
1. One year you just don't go.
2. The sky does not fall.
3. You lose the fear.
My last one was '03. We happily skipped it in '04, although my wife and I held our own "mini-memorial." The next year, we went to a local Episcopal church and took communion. That was way more inspirational and the music's a lot better, too. We reached the conclusion that religion is really a personal expression of your own unique faith, despite what the dubs teach.
This will be my first year in my entire life not attending...and I don't feel one ounce of guilt or shame for my decision. I should've bowed out last year, too...but alas, I wasn't strong enough in my own convictions to just say no. I'll happily stay home and watch some movies, order in some pizza or something, and just enjoy my "just another Sunday night".
I remember when the memorial was a special occasion. I would buy new clothes for my 2 children and myself, we would get dressed up and everyone I know would be there. The ceremony felt somewhat special, at least it was a change, with the wine and crackers being passed around. By the time I left it was a total drag. I would force my then teen aged kids to put on their dress clothes, somthing they hated. I made this big effort to get us all there and then it was just stupid. I was beginning to see that it was a meaningless ritual. My children and I were ignored as we didn't attend frequently enough for anyone to bother saying hello. The meeting was in a high school facility, very tacky. My very last memorial I attended for my mother's sake, as she was dying and I knew it would make her happy. It was OK, by then I had been out a few years and it was strange and familiar all at once. I knew it would be my last meeting ever, it was closure for me. Now I don't even think about it or usually even know what date it is. That page has turned.
