Classic, MadSweeney.
Are you your own worst enemy?
by Terry 26 Replies latest jw friends
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TotallyADD
Sometimes I am and sometimes Im not. But now days I am not. Again I don't like strong debates. They for some reason make me sick to my stomach. Don't get me wrong if I am cornered I will come out fighting. Then later anxiety sets in and I feel bad about it. When it comes to christian and humanist debates I stay away form it. It is a no win war of words. All anybody cares about is being right. In the long run they are all wrong. Totally ADD.
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Terry
The core problem with religious debates is that neither side is honest. They are scoring points.
This makes it a zero sum game. Religion is serious. The price you pay when you commit to God is a lifelong payment plan.
Getting locked in to the wrong plan bankrupts you of your time, energy, money, emotional health and mental stability.
With stakes that high this is a deadly serious "GAME".
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trevor
Sometimes people do make provocative statements and when this happens, I fall back on a counselling(UKSpelling) technique called ‘reflecting.’ It involves not taking the bait but repeating what the person has said without offering your own opinion, asking a question or seeking to correct them. They feel heard and at the same time they become aware of how they sound. For example:
Customer: I come here often and all your Christian books are expensive. Is it because you’re are not a Christian?
Terry: You think all our Christian books are expensive.
Customer: Yes, well some of them are.
Terry: You think some of our books are expensive.
Customer: The little shop down the road has a sale on.
Terry: Ah! You have been to the little shop with a sale on and you are comparing prices.
Customer: Yes, I don’t want to spend more than I have to.
Terry: I can understand that, I am the same as you (establishing rapport)
Customer: Oh! I’m pleased you understand. The thing is you have a much better range and a nicer shop.
Terry: We do our best to keep a good stock and make your visit enjoyable.
Customer: They don’t have the book I want.
Terry: I see. You have returned to us because we tend to stock the books you want.
Customer: Yes, I’ve always been pleased with your service.
Terry: That’s very nice to hear. Which book can help you find today.
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cyberjesus
"What you've just said to me I find insulting. Is that how you intended it?"
pure wisdom.
I rarely get angry... but I get passionate and it oftens is mistaken as anger.... so I do have to clarify oftentimes that I am not angry.
Many people get offended as if everything is directed at them... they think the whole world revolves around them so to speak.....
Assumptions and being controlled by your emotions are the weapons of your enemy...(you)
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sabastious
Or, is there something more constructive in what we say and how we post? Does everything have to end up US vs THEM?
I don't condone bickering, but the Creationism/Atheism debate is extremely hot right now, I believe in all the world, so there's no sense trying to curtail JWN's version of the debate. I got my words in and now I just read it every now and then to check for anything new. A consensus will come, in time.
-Sab
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sabastious
I rarely get angry... but I get passionate and it oftens is mistaken as anger.... so I do have to clarify oftentimes that I am not angry.
Sometimes it doesn't matter whether or not you are angry. When you decide not to back down...
-Sab