This is a competitive universe. Well, here on Earth, anyway...
None of us has to settle for less than the very best unless we are cheap.
Why hire a cheap God when you can get a better one?
What the heck am I talking about?
I'm talking about Bible God. This deity needs to be fired and I do mean now.
I know..I know..you are going to say: "There he goes again..."
But, hear me out.
You see, I have made it pretty clear on various posts out of the ten thousand or so I've made here that I think the Bible itself has been misrepresented.
As a result of it being OVER-rated, as soon as we discover its flaws, we are very apt to chuck the whole thing in the trash bin.
The same thing is likely to be true of God. Bible God is horribly misrepresented too. We can easily get fed up with his sullen temper tantrums, grudges,
curses, threats and arbitrary value system (he plays favorites.)
I contend we need to FIRE this Bible God and hire a better one.
What does THAT mean?
It means taking personal responsibility for the kind of God you have settled for.
Tammy has proved this to me, by the way!
Tammy has a perfectly delightful God who is warm, fuzzy, loving and a real pal who is THERE for her.
Consequently, nobody's bad-mouthing of Bible God touches a hair on Tammy's flaxen-haired darling. (I'm not being sarcastic.)
Tammy has hired the best.
What are the rest of us stuck with?
Most often it is the teeth-gritting, growling, foul tempered Old Testament bully.
Or, a sort of will-o-the-wisp ethereal Zen god.
There is Super Jesus, too. He is everything! Man, God, both, neither, spirit, you name it. Completely zany and far-fetched as a Chinese algebra problem.
Let's get rid of this Sudoku superstar, shall we?
YOU'RE FIRED!
Take a moment. Deep breath. Clear your head.
What kind of God are you looking for?
The one I want to hire has to fill these requirements:
1.Kind to a fault without being a namby-pampy hippy. Solid kindness. Good souled. Helpful without asking a heavy fee.
2.No penis or vagina! I don't want anthropomorphic Gods applying. None of that women-hating nonsense. This job requires a GENUINE DEITY without human form, thoughts, attitudes or emotional baggage.
3.No Byzantine chronologies allowed! Now hear this: if something is worth doing, God, DO IT, DAMMIT! Don't string people along for thousands of years waiting and waiting and speculating and imagining....
4.MAKE YOURSELF CLEAR! Don't use humans to transmit anything. They are full of shit, goofy and unreliable. ANNOUNCE from the sky! We promise to pay attention.
5.Just Get on with it! If there is something you NEED from us--spell it out and be done with it. If you don't really need anything and don't intend to step in and help us out--get that straight with us too. Go on your merry way and let us do the best we can. But, don't flirt and leave us all hot and bothered.
Now is all that too much for you to handle?
In the final analysis, we get the God we deserve.
GOSH DARN IT---I DESERVE THE VERY BEST, so I'm staging an intervention here.
Let everybody know what kind of God you've hired (or fired.)
If a JW approaches you with their ridiculous NWT God with the veins standing out in His neck---just hold up your hand and say:
"I've dumped Jehovah for a much much nicer God. My God is so wonderful there is no name required to differentiate from all the crappy ones."
