there are 2 classes of ex Jehovahs witnesses (page 3)

pirata

Find new friends. Contrary to popular belief, a lot of "worldly" people are not into drugs and group sex.

WontLeave

MOST of the JWs that I knew and met were wonderful people.

At one time, I would probably have agreed with you. I wasn't in their good graces long enough to have years of experience with them acting like wonderful people. Truly wonderful people will be wonderful under varying conditions, not only in particular circumstances. If someone is "wonderful" toward you when you think and act like them, but then turn on you and attack you when you don't, they aren't actually wonderful; they're manipulative.

It's my belief that JWs fall in love with the "brotherhood" veneer JWs put on; not with the actual person underneath. The relationships are shallow and based more on a mutual fear and hatred for "outsiders" than on anything positive perceived in each other. Once someone becomes "an outsider", the relationship is over, because it wasn't personal, but organizational. When the false pretense of friendship is dropped, the real person comes out and you can see the nasty, backstabbing, busybody personality lurking inside, waiting to stroke its ego at someone else's expense.

Especially among elders, in their back-room inquisitions, I've watched people go from pleasant and friendly to vile and blood-thirsty. Since they believe they hold your everlasting life in their hands, their eagerness to cut you off from Paradise for not holding to arbitrary rules is equal to murder. But, since they're the ones who determine your inclusion or exclusion, they are the first to perceive you as an "outsider" and once you are ousted from the group, you lose the status as human, in their minds.

Elders are nothing more than entry-level management of the organization, taken from the rank and file. Nearly every male in the organization pursues a goal of becoming an elder and eagerly assumes the mentality to kill his brothers and sisters for the group, to please the Governing Body. These are not "wonderful people". They are whitewashed graves who are full of dead men's bones. When JWs are thrown out, they just lose the whitewash.

ProdigalSon

They think they're in "good standing" just because they haven't been df'd? They think they can take an extended vacation from slavedrudgery and just go back and be welcomed like the Prodigal Son? They might be in for a big fuckin surprise....

maninthemiddle

WontLeave: My experience and your experience couldn't be more different. MOST of the JWs that I knew and met were wonderful people.

I agree I have seen both, I think it is r epresentative of the community they are from.

I would answer this as, I don't want to be around people who would treat me in this fassion, so I wont be frinds with ex-jws that would treat me that way.

I would suggest you find some new friends that compliment the way you live your own life.

As mentioned above there is much truth in the "bad assocation" verse.

ziddina

"Now Im experiencing the same kind of shit that I experieced in the Hall, The ex JW,s are just as judgemental, and stupid as when they were at the kingdom hall, For eg You were DF,d WE were not, ..."

Ah, let me point out one thing...

There are more than two kinds of "ex" Jehovah's Witnesses.

In fact, they cover a broad spectrum, ranging from those who have been momentarily disfellowshipped and are eagerly attending meetings and being shunned, in the hopes of being reinstated as quickly as possible, to those who hated being intimidated or bullied into the religion and couldn't wait to get out...

But it sounds like you've been associating with those on the "nearest to the Watchtower Society's mentality..." end of the spectrum - the ones who haven't shaken off that elitist, judgmental mentality, yet.

I wish you the swiftest and best results in finding ex-JWs spread across the rest of the spectrum, in the near future...

Zid - the She-Devil

rebel8

If any ex-dubs are bragging about not being dfd and putting down those who were, then they are pathetic losers who have absolutely nothing else going for themselves.

I am certain this group of total losers has small penises and even smaller IQs.

Why hang out with men with small penises who do coke and make up stories about having group sex?

I was not dfd but since the dfing is an action taken by others, independent of how deserving the victim was, it's not something to brag about. Idiots.

Precious few ex-JWs were thrown out for rising above the organization and being labeled an "apostate" for achieving actual Christian beliefs and emotions. Most are thrown out for allowing their trashy personality to get the best of them and lapsing into totally unacceptable behavior.

Evidence?

serenitynow!

If any ex-dubs are bragging about not being dfd and putting down those who were, then they are pathetic losers who have absolutely nothing else going for themselves

.

I agree. Also, I would add that if a so-called exJW is bragging and looking down on others for being d/f'd, then that person is not really an exJW. They are I think JW apologists, who just don't go to the hall.

I'm friends with exJWs who are d/f'd, and ones who hated it and just walked away.

I am not d/f'd. I don't consider myself any less exJW than someone who is d/f'd (with no desire or intent to go back) or d/a'd.

Whenever someone asks me if I'm d/f'd I respond "no I'm not...yet." I realize that it's just a matter of time until I am d/f'd in absentia.

jam

The worst class of ex JW, the one taking an extended vacation

as Prodigal son mention. This type still believe it,s the truth.

He believe he is not good enough to be A JW and yet don,t

fit in with the world, so he,s in limbo. Those that have been

DF may feel they were not good enough, but in many cases

these ones move on, because they see the ugly side of the

borg.. So the ones who leave for A good time and not DF

continue thru life with low self-esteen. These are the ones

the WT speaks about, A self-ful-filling prophecy. They become

worst then the world.

TotallyADD

I have to agree with Outlaw. The GB does cause 99% of their problems. When I was a elder I learned more about imoral sex than I ever learned at work on a construction site. Also many people whom become JW come from very disfunctional back grounds such as "drugs, sex addication, drinking, grambling, being very violent and so on." Then many who are born-ins are raised by such people who may try their best to bring up their kids but don't have the right skillful tools to do so. With that and much more in mind the GB in their WT or KM give counsel to them on don't do this and don't do that. Always bringing up these things. Its like you have a friend who is a alcoholic who been on the wagon for many years. Every time your friends comes over to see you all you talk about is how bad it is to drink. What effect do you think it has on this person who is fighting alcoholism. This is the same with what goes on in WT land. I remember when I was 17 years old they had a talk on the service meeting about oral copulation. Most did'nt have a idea what they were talking about except younger married couples. With that thought fresh in their heads guess what happen that night in bed. All of us who leave this cult are adults. As adults we have to work hard on making right choices to govern our lifes. Whatever the choice is we have to pay the consequnces for that decision we made. Are there two classes of ex JW? There are probably even more of various shades. The important thing is what choices are we personally going to make with our new lives? Totally ADD

WontLeave

Evidence?

Unfortunately, those statistics aren't publicly-available. I could give a few "some names have been changed" sort of anecdotal evidence, but I'm afraid those aren't very persuasive. I personally know many currently or past-DFed JWs. None were removed for apostasy, but criminal activity and adultery seem to be the main reasons. Most who would be removed as "apostates" seem to fade, DA, or never get baptized. I should have made it clearer I was referring to disfellowshipped ex-JWs, specifically.

there are 2 classes of ex Jehovahs witnesses

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