If Men Could Menstruate

by mrsjones5 94 Replies latest social relationships

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  mrsjones5

  If Men Could Menstruate

  by Gloria Steinem

  A white minority of the world has spent centuries conning us into thinking that a white skin makes people superior - even though the only thing it really does is make the more subject to ultraviolet rays and to wrinkles. Male human beings have built whole cultures around the idea that penis envy is "natural" to women - though having such an unprotected organ might be said to make men vulnerable, and the power to give birth makes womb envy at least as logical.

  In short, the characteristics of the powerful, whatever they may be, are thought to be better than the characteristics of the powerless - and logic has nothing to do with it.

  What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?

  The answer is clear - menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event:

  Men would brag about how long and how much.

  Boys would mark the onset of menses, that longed-for proof of manhood, with religious ritual and stag parties.

  Congress would fund a National Institute of Dysmenorrhea to help stamp out monthly discomforts.

  Sanitary supplies would be federally funded and free. (Of course, some men would still pay for the prestige of commercial brands such as John Wayne Tampons, Muhammad Ali's Rope-a-dope Pads, Joe Namath Jock Shields - "For Those Light Bachelor Days," and Robert "Baretta" Blake Maxi-Pads.)

  Military men, right-wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation ("men-struation") as proof that only men could serve in the Army ("you have to give blood to take blood"), occupy political office ("can women be aggressive without that steadfast cycle governed by the planet Mars?"), be priest and ministers ("how could a woman give her blood for our sins?") or rabbis ("without the monthly loss of impurities, women remain unclean").

  Male radicals, left-wing politicians, mystics, however, would insist that women are equal, just different, and that any woman could enter their ranks if she were willing to self-inflict a major wound every month ("you MUST give blood for the revolution"), recognize the preeminence of menstrual issues, or subordinate her selfness to all men in their Cycle of Enlightenment. Street guys would brag ("I'm a three pad man") or answer praise from a buddy ("Man, you lookin' good!") by giving fives and saying, "Yeah, man, I'm on the rag!" TV shows would treat the subject at length. ("Happy Days": Richie and Potsie try to convince Fonzie that he is still "The Fonz," though he has missed two periods in a row.) So would newspapers. (SHARK SCARE THREATENS MENSTRUATING MEN. JUDGE CITES MONTHLY STRESS IN PARDONING RAPIST.) And movies. (Newman and Redford in "Blood Brothers"!)

  Men would convince women that intercourse was more pleasurable at "that time of the month." Lesbians would be said to fear blood and therefore life itself - though probably only because they needed a good menstruating man.

  Of course, male intellectuals would offer the most moral and logical arguments. How could a woman master any discipline that demanded a sense of time, space, mathematics, or measurement, for instance, without that in-built gift for measuring the cycles of the moon and planets - and thus for measuring anything at all? In the rarefied fields of philosophy and religion, could women compensate for missing the rhythm of the universe? Or for their lack of symbolic death-and-resurrection every month?

  Liberal males in every field would try to be kind: the fact that "these people" have no gift for measuring life or connecting to the universe, the liberals would explain, should be punishment enough.

  And how would women be trained to react? One can imagine traditional women agreeing to all arguments with a staunch and smiling masochism. ("The ERA would force housewives to wound themselves every month": Phyllis Schlafly. "Your husband's blood is as sacred as that of Jesus - and so sexy, too!": Marabel Morgan.) Reformers and Queen Bees would try to imitate men, and pretend to have a monthly cycle. All feminists would explain endlessly that men, too, needed to be liberated from the false idea of Martian aggressiveness, just as women needed to escape the bonds of menses envy. Radical feminist would add that the oppression of the nonmenstrual was the pattern for all other oppressions ("Vampires were our first freedom fighters!") Cultural feminists would develop a bloodless imagery in art and literature. Socialist feminists would insist that only under capitalism would men be able to monopolize menstrual blood . . . .

  In fact, if men could menstruate, the power justifications could probably go on forever.

  If we let them.
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  prophecor

  We would commit suicide
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  wasblind

  Ha Ha Ha
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  OnTheWayOut

  Love it, girlfriend.
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  snowbird

  There would be a federally funded 4-day vacation per man each month.

  Tee hee hee.

  Syl
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  prophecor

  ---

  Anne Napolitano: I don't believe that God made man in his image. 'Cause most of the shit that happens comes from man. No, I think man was made in the Devil's image. And women were created out of God 'Cause after all, women can have babies, which is kind of like creating And which also accounts for the fact that women are so attracted to men... 'cause let's face it... the Devil is a hell of a lot more interesting! Believe me, I've slept with some saints in my day, I know what I'm talking about. So the whole point in life is for men and women to get married... so that God and the Devil can get together and work it out. Not that we have to get married. God forbid.

  Above qute from the movie, "The Fisher King". I have never heard a more truer statement. Women are closer to being God Like, than we men. Something so quizically unique about you all. Even though we carry one of your chromosomes in our body, The X Factor, we will never be able to cut the mustard like you women do. My hats off to you!!!
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  Lozhasleft

  Ha ha ha ... good points Mrs Jones... very funny too.

  Loz x
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  beenthere26yr

  Yea, and for a few days every month he would have PMS and shut the wife, kids and dog out of the house.

  Then along about 45 or 50 he would be running the A/C when it's 10 below outside.
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  mrsjones5

  Credit goes to BOTR. She posted about the piece on another thread.
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  talesin

  One of my favs, by one of my idols... tks