My husband and I were siting at a Sunday morning meeting . I was looking around during the public talk at all the sullen faces and thought to myself " Do i really want to live forever with these people ?" I also took a good look at my husband as he blankly stared at the speaker ....he was not happy either ,but going through all the motions to keep in the good graces of the powers that be ....That is when I leaned over and asked , 'if he would rather be at home ,because I really want to go home ..' Once we got home I told him I was never going back again .
Many events led up to this point over many ,many years . At this point it just felt like I could not possibly survive one more moment in that place ,and still remain sane . My husband was quite shocked ,and at first thought I was leaving him . After a few tense days I was able to explain enough to him that my unhappiness was with the religion not him . Thankfully he decided not to go back either ,and over the past few years has come to see the manipulating nature of the JW's for himself .
It was the scariest decision I have ever made ,and clearly one of the BEST . I felt like I was jumping off a burning bridge ...not sure if I would survive the fall or be able to swim once I hit the water,but I knew if I didn't try I would surely die if i just kept standing there .
One of my biggest concerns was what would my kids and husband do ?? Would they shun me or hate me for distrupting the only life we all knew ? I had to squash those fearful thoughts and just made the decision FOR MY OWN HAPPINESS and sanity .....Thankfully it has worked out well . My husband faded with me . Gradually all of our three children have faded on their own and for their own reasons .
We have had some ups and downs along the way just like everyone else here . We also have JW relatives that now have disowned us ,but as far as I am concerned.......,Take the plunge " Come on In the water is fine ! "