Robin,
Interestingly enough, I rarely posted about my journey from born-in JW to where I am now.
When I left, my mantra was "fuck God", which I guess could be considered a natural reaction to the "God" I was sold by the Watchtower religion who didn't deliver on any promises the seller of that God said He would.
The next 10 years I was an agnostic. (I was never any atheist, but I might as well have been). Then I did the Eastern Philosophies, Buddhism (especially Zen which I found quite enlightening), then I read the "Tao" by Laozi (Lao Tse) which was very illuminating. Simple. Elegant. Meaningful. No God. Just "Heaven" personified. The Tao was "The Way. The Path." Personified. Interestingly enough, Jesus talked about The Way, also. Only Jesus was hundreds of years later than Laozi.
Then I studied science at the quantum level, but only as an uneducated idiot, and I learned a lot from that.
Then I read "The Age of Reason" by that great Revolutionary patriot Thomas Paine, a friend of Thomas Jefferson and the other great patriots of that era. I realized that the Bible is not just a book that contains bullshit, the Bible is a book that is full of bullshit.
I became a Deist, just like Paine, and just like Jefferson. A deist believes a Creator exists, but is not at all involved in His creation. Whereas a theist, (like dubs and most Christians) believe the Creator IS involved in his creation and does miracles, saves lives, and even makes a miracle possible for you to catch up on your car payments! (While also letting a 4 year old little girl get raped and tortured and brutally murdered a few blocks away while you are celebrating catching up on your car payment and thanking God for being able to do it.)
Then I had another epiphany about science. It was the Big Bang. Science can not and will not address the sticky issue about HOW the super-condensed stuff that exploded to cause the Big Bang itself came into existence. It is not something that can be understood and tested. No time existed whenever the "stuff" that the Big Bang came from was just a bunch of stuff. There was NO such thing as TIME then! How did it get there? Who made it, or who provided it? Where did it come from?
It had to be a Creator or Creators. There is no other explanation.
No. Despite all the claims of the assholes who cannot clearly understand my thoughts on this subject which I've articulated for years, I am NOT an atheist.
I am a Deist.
(Side note: and the optimist in me says the Creator DOES care about us, and there just might possibly be more to us than just our bodies who will all eventually rot and get eaten up by other creation whose purpose it was and is to do that to keep our planet clean of the rubbish and stench of our bodies.)
Farkel