Jesus rescued me from a cult. (Just a side-note, I have had all of my scientific questions answered and then some... if you are curious about that start with creation.com.) I realized that Jesus was not my mediator, the "faithful and discreet slave" was claiming to be a replacement for Moses. But Jesus is the greater Moses! After realizing this I started feeling more joy in my life. I started understanding the meaning to scriptures. I read 1 John and I started to understand God. God can be both the Father and Jesus and also be in my heart. I also understood that salvation was a gift. I now understand unconditional love for the first time in my life. My children are so much happier because I can truly love them. Jesus gave me all of this and that is just the beginning. I am going through trials, of course, in exiting a cult, but I have been given a gift. The Holy Spirit is here with me, directing me, showing me the way and holding me to the light. I have never been so happy and so at peace. I have always felt guilty. I coudn't do any relaxing activity, even folding laundry without feeling guilty. That is gone! That huge burden is completely gone! NO guilt. Praise Him!
I feel as though I am one of the Israelites. The sea has parted before me and I follow a pillar of cloud. I don't have any excuses. I keep believing because I want to. I don't ever want to lose this feeling (and oh yes, I believe it can be lost). I pray that the Lord hold on to me and not let me go. I read my Bible every day and I pray very often. When I read my Bible I am lifted up, so it is not a chore at all, but a joy. The prayer is very natural. There is no reminding myself to do it like when I was a JW and Jesus was not with me. I just talk to Him.
I am constantly reminded that I am on the right path and that God is with me, as my prayers are answered. If I have a need it is met. This did not happen before I was born-again. I have prayed sincerely and in faith for needs and they have been very obviously answered over and over again. (1) One time I was staying at an ex-Jws house and I was exhausted, emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually. There were three families there and two of them were atheists (only myself and my husband were Christians). Several of them wanted to explain why they did not believe in God. I ran to my room there and I prayed and I slept. When I woke I couldn't come out of the room. I prayed to God that I needed my husband. I needed him or I couldn't leave the room. Seconds later he knocks on the door. (2) One day (after I had already received Jesus) the Holy Spirit led me to a church. I knocked on the door and I listened to the youth pastor's wife when she got her Bible. I listened and I cried. I found out later that was the one time out of the whole year that she was home on that day of the week. She has a normal routine of ministry that would have had that house empty any other day. (3) I was doing my Bible study and the topic was God's people. I knew what a scripture said but didn't know where to find it. I prayed for guidance because I knew I didn't have time to look it up and this was important to me. I turned right to the page. I didn't even believe it was the right page at first, but there is was, the third sentence I read. (4) I was on a walk with my little boy and he was being very unruly, trying to run away from me to cross the busy street. I prayed for help and when we got to the preschool, the teacher came out of her house to see if we needed help! (5) Another day I had been at my JW parent's house and was feeling very down. I needed someone. I prayed that God send someone to me because I didn't know who to go to. My long-distance Christian friend called me about an hour later. It was the second time in 2 years that we had ever spoken on the phone. (6) I was disappointed last weekend because we missed the neighborhood picnic. I was crying to my husband that nothing would ever change and we wouldn't have friends. I don't know where to find friends for my children. We have been alone for years. I prayed that God help me and my kids find a community so that we aren't alone. I didn't know if it needed to be school, a support group, a karate class, something, anything. God please lead me because I am so confused and this is too much to handle right now. We just need friends. Two days later our neighbor invited my daughter to AWANA club. She loves it. There is also a ladies bible study group the same night. It is wonderful. Friends for both of us! Then some exJW friends called me after that and invited us to there house to meet someone else who is just now coming out. The friends who called me are older than my parents, but the new ex-JWs are the same age as us with kids the same age! (7) My husband was struggling with something and I got on my knees and prayed for him. Later that day my pastor called me. He had not met my husband. Was my husband home? He asked. He could come by and talk to him for a few minutes. Yes he was home and I wasn't turning him down. God is good! There are others but these were the prayers that were answered very quickly and very obviously.
