Definition of "Negativity" according to JWs

by LongHairGal 20 Replies latest jw experiences

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  LongHairGal

  I recently had a falling-out with a JW which I won't go into because it is nonsense really. In one of the pathetic retorts I was told I was "negative". This wasn't the first time I heard this from a JW over the years.

  What I have noticed is that it is because I spoke about REAL life situations in the world and/or problems and wrong things in the religion. (Can you guess that I live in the real world and not some fantasy??)

  Apparently to many JWs, they cannot tolerate discussions of unpleasant things in the world OR discussions of unpleasant things in the religion. Regardless of how "negative" this is, it does not take away from the fact that what I brought up were true things. Let's face it, not all of life is pretty and it has to be discussed and dealt with.

  Sadly, many JWs are on the edge and just cannot tolerate intelligent talk about real things. They have to exist in a controlled environment where only so-called "spiritual" things are discussed.
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  LostGeneration

  Almost anything that interferes with their cult world view can is labelled "negative"

  Get a promotion at work? They twist it into being materialistic or think you will spend more time advancing your career instead of peddling Watchtowers.

  Buy a new car? Materialism

  Move into a bigger house? Materialism

  Have a hobby? You are selfish with your time.

  Oh, and the biggie, ask questions or buck the authority of the elders or FDS...APOSTATE!

  To your point though, the org and it membership is one big collective ostrich with its head in the sand. I guess its just how some people cope with life.
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  Joey Jo-Jo

  Negativity - anything against what the WB&TS teaches lol
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  jay88

  It is a new campaign they are spreading to their followers that was expressed on the 2nd day of the 2day CA.

  Basically "Shut the Hell Up" about finding out certain truths about the "truth" and if you don't like it, you know where the door is.
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  Mad Sweeney

  I've had the opposite experience with JWs. In my experience ALL THEY TALK ABOUT is negative. How bad poverty is. How bad war is. How bad people are. And how WONDERFUL it all is because it is "the sign" that "the end" is nigh.

  I think somewhere in their holy book mister Hoover said, "woe to those saying bad is good," or something to that effect.
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  leftchica

  I agree with Madsweeney, I too, have only heard jws speak how horrible the world is and how "this life in the present system of things" is horrible, now way to live and they "cant wait for the New world".. My husband is still a jw, I dissasociated myself 2 years ago. I try hard to speak constanly of how "great life" is,, and how people are kind and share experiences from work and friends and talk of people i know who volenteer and help others. It throws him off but over the years it seems to be wearing off. (I hope)

  But when i was around them,t I remember how they always had Nothing positive or happy to say or look at you weird if you talked about a hobby or asperations. They definatley don't say ANYTHING negitive about "THE TRUTH", thats very true. They arn't allowed, its un heard of. It was one of the MANY factors that made me feel somthing wasnt' right about this religion and was a red flag for me. I tried to fit in at first and invite the witnesses over to get to know them on personal levels but felt all they talked about WAS the religion, field service, Jehovah, how horrible the world it, how bad going clubbing or at a bar is..yada yada. I realized the only thing i had in commen with these people were the fact we believed the same belif and thats it. They rarely have other interest from what I have seen.

  I remember when i was being converted, I had the 2 bible studies pioneers over for dinner and I casually said how i didnt enjoy the second half of the meeting, and that it seemed a waste of time to Re read the entire watchtower from podium, after we already read it in our homes. Smoke almost came out of the one pioneers head and her face got weird. The other one figeted around in the chair and then they both preached to me how great the watchtower studys are and how they benifit us.

  Funny, now when i think back on that night. At the time, I felt wrong for thinking that way.
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  WontLeave

  all they talked about WAS the religion

  True enough. It's a slam-dunk proof of the cult mindset. Their obsession with their religion and how everything has to revolve around it is creepy. Get a few together and the music they listen to is from the cult, every conversation is about the cult (gushing about the latest propaganda rag, exagerating events in "service", idolizing the last assembly or convetion, etc.), people take it upon themselves to go around and enforce cult rules - "Should one of Jehovah's people wear a T-shirt with a band name on it?", "Should one of Jehovah's people wear a skirt that short?", "Should Jehovah's people play a competitive game?", "Should Jehovah's young people of different genders be talking alone?", etc. Yet, with the endless river of "theocratic" gobbledygook spewing from their mouths, is there ever any mention of God, Jesus, the Bible? No, it's all about meetings, magazines, knocking on doors, the Society, and how horrible everything non-JW is. For people who talk about religion all the time, they never say anything sprititual; it's all about the mundane and man-made. Even when they do say "Jehovah"™, they're usually really referring to the Society, the literature, the cult, or the leaders thereof.
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  Stealth

  My father is a JW for 40 years and he is the most negative persion that I have ever knows. There is so much negativity in the religion that I think it has become part of his core. Everyone who is not a JW are incompetent idiots, dumb. I never hear him say anything positive about someone who is not a JW.
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  Darkside Blues

  Agreeing with a lot of posts here. I admit to being more on the pessimistic side, but I'm a Pollyanna compared to JWs. I hate how they always talk about how bad things in the world are and they fail to see anything good about it. Even events that are nominally negative can have a positive effect on individuals - for instance, getting a divorce is, for some couples, the best thing they can do instead of remaining trapped in an unhealthy marriage.

  If you have a great bod and wear clothes that show off too much leg or any degree of cleavage, you're "immodest," not confident or comfortable in your own skin. If you're able to afford the finer things in life, you're "materialistic." If you have a lengthy conversation with someone of the opposite sex and is not your spouse, you must be flirting with them. If you have time to do anything that isn't either secular work that brings home a paycheck or "spiritual activity," you're accused of having too much time on your hands and not doing enough for Jahoover.

  Personally I'm glad I don't see the world the way they do. I don't see how anyone with their kind of mindset even manages to leave the house.
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  factfinder

  My brother told me many times that I am "negative'. Whenever I mentioned any kind of problem-he does not want to hear it. He does have his head in the sand and does not want to know about anything that he sees as negative. He says he does not want to be discouraged, only upbuilt. We should only discuss "upbuilding things"- Fs experiences, points we like from the latest magazines or books or something good we heard at the meeting. He will not listen to anything he views as negative about the society or gb or "slaaaave"- he really does stretch the word out in a fake southern accent when he says it.

  There was one elder who only told me about how sick a certain sister was, or some other bad thing that happened to somebody- I always felt down after having these discussions with him.

  My brother does not even listen to music! Only the cds the society puts out! I love the Norwegian band a-ha, and anyone who is familiar with them knows that their music is not condemned by the society (although the Society does condemn pop/rock music in general). Yet, my brother does not want to hear any of their music- only the "kingdom songs". He and his wife seem to live in a protective vacuum- keeping themselves as sealed off from reality as they can. They want to remain oblivious, and only know of things pertaining to 'the truth'.

  When we were on speaking terms (he cut me off since July 2010 because I refuse to go back to the meetings) he only wrote and spoke to me about theocratic things: points from a meeting or magazine, fs experiences etc. And he would mention a brother or sister who stays away from meetings due to a dispute with someone in the cong. I tried explaining to him that the reason I gave up going was I could no longer find a reason to go. There was no longer anything there to DRAW me to the meetings. He of course, feels that all who leave do so because of weakness and a bad attitude. He always preached to me. Yet when speaking to my brother & sister he'd always talk about normal, everyday things and keep them up to date on what was happening in their lives, (outside of meetings & FS.)

  LongHairGal- I can definatly relate to your post.

  LostGeneration- I agree- they want to keep their head in the sand. But maybe they get peace that way.

  Stealth- just like your Dad, my brother never has anything nice to say about non-witnesses. Even my best friend Craig-who is the nicest, warmest guy you could ever meet, my brother refuses to even refer to him by name. He says that obedience to Jehovah is much more important than being a nice, kind guy. Sadly, my brother is a pharisee.