Had a Frustrating Discussion with Mom... (page 3)

Quandry

Your conversation does indeed sound frustrating.

I remember a sign in the school I used to work in. There was a small circle with the words, "Bang head here." It is indeed sometimes like coming up against a brick wall. I am sure that if your head hit once, you wouldn't look to do it again. Therefore, next time, just uh huh mom and go on to something else. I am sure it's because she feels that she is getting older and is desperate to see you "get right with Jehovah" before she dies.

My parents are both gone. I can guarantee you that it just happens so fast. Don't get sucked into another time killing discussion. Tell mom you must agree to disagree, then start asking questions about your family history, talk about things from when you were a child, etc., because after she's gone you'll want to ask but can't.

tenyearsafter

Great suggestions everyone!

I will hope that a few things we talked about will get her thinking...she is a very intelligent woman. She is also alone...she just has my brother (a diehard JW) and me to rely on. The "brothers" have pretty much ignored her at this point since she is no longer able to go door to door or regularly attend meetings. The only time she gets to meetings is if my brother takes her. The elders think they did their good deed because they allowed her to have a phone hook up to listen to the meetings. She has been in her current house for almost 5 years, and I don't believe anyone in the congregation, other than my brother, has offered to take her to a meeting. When she is sick, it is up to my brother and I to take her to the doctor and arrange for her needs. I don't expect others to do this, but it amazes me how invisible she is to the congregation (she pioneered until she could no longer go door to door). I can only hope that she sees the lack of love and concern, and it resonates with her. She basically told me during our "chat" that I could never shake her faith or change her mind. I told her that was not my intention, but she should not expect to change mine my mind either.

I will use the suggestion of "Jehovah can read my heart", and let her get some comfort from it. In the meantime, I can just hope that she (and my brother) can open their eyes enough to at least think for themselves and ask themselves the honest questions.

jookbeard

you done well and I would have had exactly then same style of exchange with my mum given the chance, sure the world has problems there are 7 billion of us stuck on it FFS! just keep plugging away, she might just see the light after all these years.

ABibleStudent

Hi tenyearsafter, good logical presentations to your mother. I'm sorry that you feel frustrated by your mother's cult persona, but at least she is not shunning you. You should feel encouraged that she still associates with you. If you get frustrated talking with your mother in the future, you could always read her the 07/15/2011 Watchtower Study Edition article about shunning your relatives and ask her how the Watchtower's advice will make her life better?

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

Ding

She kept saying that JW's don't place the GB on a pedestal.

When I first read this statement of Tenyearsafter's mother, I said, "How blind can she be?"

But in one sense, she is right. How so?

Most JWs don't even know the names of the men on the GB. If they were introduced to one of them face to face as "Brother So-and-so" they wouldn't make the connection that they were a GB member. Because of this anonymity, in that sense JWs can say that they don't venerate those men.

In a way, that's a part of the problem. The don't see the men behind the WT curtain.

JWs know that all men are fallible, but they believe in a mythical, collective "faithful and discreet slave organization" that transcends all human weaknesses and feeds them good spiritual meat in due season. Somehow it's these "spirit-chosen" and "spirit-directed" ones who, they believe, direct Jehovah's work on earth, not fallible human beings like Charlie Russell, Joe Rutherford, Nate Knorr, Freddy Franz, Ted Jaracz, or David Splane.

In other words, they are trusting -- not the individuals who actually comprise the GB -- but a class of fictional leaders who simply don't exist.

In CoC, Ray Franz indicated that even the GB themselves buy into this deception. The WTS is "God's organization" and "God's organization" needs to regulate everything the rank and file do. They couldn't see that they were just a bunch of fallible men trying to run every JW's life as if they themselves were God.

cyberjesus

You must be knew to this site

ShirleyW with 500 posts since 2007 to Tenyearsafter with 1200 posts since 2007

I love it!

Babyruth

I can feel that many of you are frustrated with your parents like me....raised in the organization, pioneered, ministerial servant and elder until I was 50. I feel the organization left me I didn't leave it. I couldn't be a hypocrite and go to peoples doors or speak from the stage about a time table the organization said was from Jah that wasn't true.

My heart goes out to all of you who have parents as I do still loyal to the organization. My Mom and Dad in there Mid and late 80's like yours and see things only one way and I have come to realize that is OK. We still clash at times as they try to control me. I get upset that they don't see how what we were taught has changed and is no longer the truth and how a group of men tring to keep things together are reinventing and streaching a concept not truly from scripture to keep people in the fold.

We have to reallize that there is something that we saw or found in our hearts that changed us. Our parents have to see that for themselves as well. Most importantly we must never forget that a true spiritual person is measured not my how many times you go to meetings, comment or hours in field ministry but by the amount of love they allow to come in and out of there lives.

Had a Frustrating Discussion with Mom...